Trying To Find Their Place
by ermireallydontcare
Summary: Carlisle and his newest son, Harry, find a dying girl and make a decision that changes the lives of them and their family. They soon realise that she is like no vampire before her. Can she ever truly find where she belongs? PBD. Full summary inside.
1. A Night That Ends In Tragedy

**This idea has been in my head for a while, and I decided that I might as well write it.**

**It's a look at what happens when two new members join the Cullen family post Breaking Dawn.**

**Oh, I don't own Twilight, btw. You didn't need me telling you that, but I thought it best I did anyway.**

**A big thank you to everyone at Project Team Beta, for all your amazing help toward making this first chapter presentable.**

**Also I presume the majority of people reading this will be American. Due to the fact that Amelia is British, and this first chapter shows some of her human life, I have used some British words/ phrases in this chapter, to help keep it authentic. If you don't understand what I mean there is a list of definitions/ explantations at the bottom. This isn't a problem in later chapters, as she spends the majority of the story in America, surrounded by Americans/ vampires who've lived in America for centuries.**

**

* * *

**

**I really struggled getting the summary small enough to fit the character limit, so I feel I should put the full summary up here. Hopefully it will give you a clearer idea off what this is about and where it is going:**

When Carlisle Cullen and his newest son, Harry Leone-Cullen, find a dying girl in a London Tube station, they make a decision that will change the lives of both them and their family.

Intuitive Harry, mesmerized by the dying girl, finds himself making a request from is new adoptive father that he never thought he'd ask of anyone or for anyone.

But when she wakes up, they realize there's never been a vampire quite like Amelia Hunter.

**What can a happy-go-lucky, unpredictable, teenager of the 21st century do to help a century-and-a-half vampire with a tragic past?**

**And what will the Cullens do now that Carlisle's created, to quote Emmett, 'the world's freakiest vampire'?**

In over a century of existence, Harry has never been happier than he is now that he is a Cullen - he thinks he's finally found the place he belongs. And Amelia finds herself believing that her life was always heading toward being a vampire and that she's found the place she was always meant to be - as a member of the Cullen family.

**But was her life always heading towards Harry as well?**

**

* * *

**

**1. A Night That Ends In Tragedy**

February 2010

London, England

_Amelia_

"Bye! Happy Birthday!" I hugged my friend Katie goodbye.

"You four sure you'll be OK catching the Tube?" Katie asked with a slightly worried tinge to her voice.

"We'll be fine. There are four of us," my other friend, Nicole, replied confidently.

"Yeah, we're big girls," Holly shouted, slurring her words. Holly wasn't my favorite person in the world. There was something about her that bugged me slightly. We were friends in the loosest sense of the word. I got along with okay with her when there were others around - and she wasn't drunk.

"Someone's had too much to drink!" Emma shouted at her jokingly.

"Cos you're so sober yourself," I taunted back at Emma.

To be honest we'd all drunk a little too much that night, but it was Katie's 18th after all.

"Ok," Katie said. "See you at school on Monday," she called as she and the rest of the group walked away, while Holly, Nicole, Emma and I started to walk in the opposite direction toward the nearest Tube station.

"If we make it," Emma shouted back, and we all laughed.

As we began to walk toward the station my mind drunkenly drifted. It had been a good night, exactly what someone like Katie deserved. Poor Katie; she was so sweet and kind, but so shy that she always seem to hover on the fringe of the action and she had this unfounded self-conscious idea that no one really liked having her around. Even though she hadn't mentioned anything, I knew she worried that no one would want to come. Of course everyone had shown up. Despite her view of herself, everyone liked Katie; it a side effects of being sweet and kind. God knows I don't spend £30 present, an entire week's EMA that is, on a birthday present for just anyone.

I was pulled from my thoughts when we got to the Tube station. I hadn't really been paying much attention to my friends' conversation, so I quickly listened in time to hear Holly boasting about her latest fuck (wow, go you) as the other two encouraged while actually laughing at her. Holly assumed they were laughing with her, and not at her. Or maybeshe knew they were laughing at her and was too far out of it to care. I quickly decided I really wasn't missing much conversation-wise.

I let them all go through first at the one working barrier, and I noticed the guard eyeing us with a look that showed exactly what he thought of drunk teenage girls. Pretentious twat, I thought angrily, when he shot us a look that clearly screamed 'look at the state of the kids these days'. Don't believe everything you read in the media – we're not all anti-social chavs. I swiped my purse (which contained my Oyster card, it always amused me that I didn't have to get it out for it to work) at the barriers and went through after my friends, I ran slightly to keep up, but struggled in my heels. It didn't escape my attention that they didn't wait for me, didn't even stop and turn around as I shouted 'wait'. Sometimes I understood exactly what Katie meant about feeling invisible.

"What train are we getting?" I asked to bring myself back into the conversation, interrupting Holly's slurred monologue about which boy she was going to fuck next, apparently.

"Dunno," Nicole replied, "if we get the, oh bollocks!" I turned to what had caused her distraction. There was a big sign saying 'out of order' on the down escalator. Just great, I thought as we turned to the stairs.

"Wait, picture time!" Nicole declared, pulling out her camera. Nicole could always be counted on to bring her camera to the party. "Get one of me and the sign!" she shouted, passing the camera to Emma and rushing to stand by the 'out of order' sign. "Holly. Amelia. Get in!" she called to us. Holly nearly fell over as she bent down beside her, while I bent down at the opposite side of the sign.

"Smile everyone," Emma called to us before the camera flashed in our faces. The flash caught me by surprise even though I was expecting it. _Bet I look great in that photo_, I thought sarcastically.

"You gonna put all the photos from tonight on Facebook, Nic?" Emma asked.

"Yeah, I'll do it tomorrow," she replied, "once I've recovered that is," she added jokingly. We all laughed at he.

I was feeling rather happy again now I realized as we walked towards the stairs. It was weird how a simple thing like being included in a picture can lift your spirits right up. I wasn't invisible to my friends. They wanted me around, to laugh with and take drunken pictures with. It was with a happy skip to my step that I started walking down the stairs.

"Did you see Rebecca's status today? Apparently she's pregnant." Emma asked me. That caught my attention.

"What?" I asked in surprise. I hadn't seen Rebecca since we both finished high school a year ago.

"Yeah, she put it on Facebook. Didn't you see it?" I shook my head; I must have missed the update when I checked mine before leaving to go out tonight.

"God, she's such a mess. She can hardly look after herself, never mind a kid. Imagine having her as a mum, poor kid," Nicole said. As harsh as it sounded, I agreed with her.

"She's a fucking slag," Holly shouted. Oh just shut up you drunk bitch, I thought meanly.

Just then my heel caught on the step, and I felt my feet slip beneath me. Instinctively my hands flew out to grab the handrail as I felt each of my friend's hands grab me. Carefully I righted myself on the step.

"You OK?" I heard the three voices of my friends ask.

"Yeah. That was close," I muttered.

"Imagine if you'd fallen down there," Nicole said wonderingly, looking down the long flight of stairs. _I'd rather not thank you_, I thought sarcastically. I felt her and Emma let go of my arm, as I let go of the handrail, I stood up properly and tried to steady myself, which was a difficult task since Holly still clung to my arm, and her weight caused me to sway a little.

"I wonder if you'd survive," Holly said, continuing to slur her words. I tried to remember if she had drunk more than us.

"God, you really are out of your fucking head aren't you?" I said jokingly, though really wanted to distract them from the thought of my possible demise at the bottom of a flight of stairs.

"So what?" Holly snapped back.

"Just saying," I replied calmly. I wasn't going to get into an argument with a drunken Holly. However her grip on my arm was really beginning to annoy me. "You can get off my arm now," I ordered snappily. I hadn't meant for it to come out so angrily. I tried to pull my arm free, but Holly kept hold. What was she doing?

"No – make me!" Holly shouted at me, and I noticed her hold tighten on my arm. The alcohol was making her more temperamental then she usually was, I guessed, and she didn't have the best temper even when sober.

"Sheesh, calm down, Hols," Emma said jokingly. I could tell she was trying to defuse the situation.

"Stay out of it, Emma!" Holly shouted.

"Holly, stop acting like a twat!" Nicole snapped at her.

"Let's find out," Holly slurred the words that seemingly came out of nowhere. I didn't understand what she meant, and I felt her tighten her grip on my arm to the point where it hurt.

"Let go of my arm please, Holly," I asked calmly, making sure I didn't lose my temper this time, as I knew it wouldn't do any good.

"No, I want to find out!" Holly said strangely. What was she talking about? Find out what?

"Find out what?" I heard myself and my other two friends question her warily.

"What would happen," Holly said, as if it made perfect sense.

"Holly, what are you …" I began, my voice betraying the panic I was beginning to feel, but I was cut off when suddenly Holly pushed me. My feet slipped from below me again, but this time I didn't have time to react. I fell and heard each sickening bang vibrating through my head as I hit the steps, accompanied with an explosion of pain. It was all over in less than thirty seconds, and I lay still at the bottom. I was in so much pain that I couldn't move; I couldn't even force my eyes to open.

I could hear Nicole in the distance screaming my name and the sound of footsteps running down the stairs. Then I could hear Nicole by my side, shouting my name at me. I wanted to reply to her, to say something to calm her down, but I didn't have the energy to open my mouth. It wasn't worth the pain.

"Holly, what have you done?" I heard Emma whisper sounding shocked.

"We all did it," Holly mumbled back.

"We had fuck all to do with it," Emma snapped at her.

"We need to call an ambulance," Nicole cried hysterically. This surprised me; Nicole was usually so cool-headed and collected. She was the one I usually turned to during a crisis. Then again those crises were about boys and make-up, not me being thrown down a flight of stairs.

"NO!" I heard Holly shout, followed by what sounded like a phone being thrown at a wall. "We need to leave."

No! They couldn't leave me here alone! They had to help me! If they didn't help me then …"Please don't leave me," I tried to say to them, ignoring the pain that the simple act of speaking caused me, but I didn't have the strength to say it loud enough for them to hear. I could hear them arguing above me, but I couldn't understand the words anymore. It sounded like they still planned to leave me though. "Please don't leave me," I repeated again frantically, still unable to get my voice above a whisper. I could tell it had done no good when I heard the sound of retreating footsteps. So much for my earlier 'see my friends really do care' moment. They didn't even care enough to wait for me to die, because surely that was what was going to happen now.

_I'm going to die now and I'm going to die alone._ I found myself thinking miserably of all the things I would never get a chance to do. I would never grow up, go to university and get a job. I'd never see my mum or dad again, and they'd never see me again. That was going to hurt them so much; if it were possible to survive this then I'd do anything to do so, simply to avoid them having to face that pain. I'd never see my little brother and sister grow up. I'd never get the chance to fall in love. I'd never get married and have kids. I thought of all I had done in my eighteen years of life, and it seemed so little. Nobody has done something to make their life memorable by eighteen, I thought dejectedly; it's all in the future, all to come. Now it'll never happen for me – I'll never know what could have been or who I could have become.

"What happened to her?" I didn't know how long I had lain at the bottom of those stairs, unable to move and most certainly dying, when I heard a musical voice ask that question. I hadn't heard anyone arrive, though. The voice was one of the most beautiful voices I'd ever heard. Was I dead now? Was this an angel? I was suddenly regretting ever being agnostic. But if God was supposed to be all merciful, would he not see past that to a person who had tried her best to be as good a person as possible?_ I had, hadn't I?_

I struggled to open my eyes, and when I did I saw two of the most beautiful men I'd ever seen. But it was too much effort, and I let my eyes close again.

"Harry?" I heard another voice say, just as musical as the first one but also managing to sound panicked. It was the panic in his voice that told me this was a man, not an angel. I was still alive then, if only just.

"Her scent, Carlisle, I've never smelled anything like it," the other voice replied sounding mesmerized.

"Get out of here, Harry!" the second voice ordered sternly. "Dear God, I forgot he'd be sensitive to the blood," I heard him mutter. Scent? Blood? Who were these men? And what did they want with me? _Either help me or leave me alone_, I thought bitterly.

"It's OK. I can control myself," the first voice replied, though he didn't sound to confident.

I opened my eyes to look at them again, and I noticed that one of them, a blond man, was knelt beside me looking incredulously at the other sandy-haired man. Why were they talking about my blood like that anyway? I let my eyes drop again.

"She's the nicest person I've ever met," the first voice said sounding awed. What was that supposed to mean?

"Harry!" the second voice sounded shocked.

"I'm in control, Carlisle. I've never been more in control. She won't die." The first voice sounded confident now. I gave up even trying to understand what these strange men were talking about.

"I don't think that matters– she's going to die anyway," the second voice said my surprise I found that knowledge didn't even hurt me like it should have. I'd already accepted the fact that I was going to die in the time between my friends' departure and their arrival, as much as difficult as it had been.

"Can't you do something?" the first voice sounded desperate.

The second voice suddenly began talking to me. "I'm a doctor – I'm going to try and help you, OK?" he asked me. I nodded weakly, glad they finally seemed to be doing something constructive to help me. I felt cold hands begin to probe my broken bones, and I let out a low groan of pain. "I'm sorry," the second voice, the doctor, told me – he sounded like he was sorry for more than just the pain. "She's lost too much blood, and her spine's broken along with her ribs and her legs. There's nothing I can do for her now," the doctor proclaimed sadly. "We should phone 999, but it's probably best we're not here when they arrive," he continued, still sounding depressed. "I'm sorry," he said to me again. Why did he keep apologizing? It wasn't him who pushed me down a flight of stairs.

"No!" I found my voice again, though I doubted they could hear it, it was so quiet. I didn't want to be left alone to die again. "Don't leave me to die alone like they did. I don't want to die alone. I don't want to die at all for that matter," I muttered frantically, forcing the words out no matter how much it hurt. I forced my eyes open again to look at them. They were both staring at me; the doctor had a conflicted look on his face. His sandy-haired companion was staring at me in amazement like he'd never seen anything like me before. I supposed I must have been a sight – lying broken in a pool of my own blood in the middle of an empty Tube station.

"There is _something _you can do for her," the first voice said suggestively. What? What could he do?

"I couldn't!" the doctor sounded shocked. "Not again! I always said Emmett would be the last, and I know I agreed with Bella, but she was different. I co-"

"She's too good a person to die," the first voice cut across his ramblings; it sounded crestfallen. I found myself wondering what he meant by that – he didn't know me.

"Yes, but is she too good a person for this life?" the doctor asked with emphasis. What life? Again they were talking what appeared to be nonsense to me, but they had mentioned something they could do. I found myself clinging to that hope.

"She's too good a person to die," I heard the first voice repeat forcefully. My consciousness was faltering; I thought my hearing had gone as well as there was a moment of heavy silence.

"I don't want to die," I repeated into the silence, muttering more to myself than to them. "I don't want to die now." Then the silence was broken as I heard the doctor whispering urgently to me. I couldn't hear it properly though as I dipped in and out of consciousness. Something about a way to save my life, that it would hurt but it would be over eventually, and then I'd be … reborn? I wasn't sure I'd heard that right; his words were slowly becoming just a sound in the distance. I didn't care what he had to do. I just wanted to live. I would be able to grow up. I would get to see my parents and siblings again. I wouldn't cause them any pain. I wanted to live – no matter what it took.

I felt myself slipping over the edge, losing consciousness every second. All around me was becoming slowly darker as the pain numbed. This is it, this is dying, I thought grimly to myself. I tried to think about my life, to have the whole 'life flashes before your eyes' thing, but instead I found myself thinking of the future I'd dreamed off – the future I would never had.

Then a sharp pain in my neck invaded the numbness and the darkness, which was suddenly overtaken by a searing pain spreading through me, ten times worse than the original pain – it was unbearable.

"I'm sorry," I heard the doctor say again.

"She was too good a person to die," I heard the other man repeat in a confident voice.

* * *

**A/N: For those who aren't British (just to stop confusion):**

**"It was Katie's 18th after all" = Legal drinking age in Britain is 18 not 21**

**Tube = London Underground**

**EMA = Educational Maintenance Allowance (basically if you choose to remain in school after 16 (British school leaving age), and your household income is below a certain level, the government pay you £30 a week on the condition that you show up to lessons.)**

**Oyster Card: Card you top up with money and then charges you for your journey on the Tube.**

**Chavs: Derogatory name for anti-social young people in Britain, often associated with those who wear tracksuits, lots of cheap jewelry, large hoop earrings etc.**

**Slag: Derogatory name for a promiscuous female**

**999: British emergency number, like 911.**

* * *

**So what did you think of Amelia and Harry to begin with? Reviews would be greatly appreciated, as this is my first time doing an original character fan fic, so I would love to know what you thought of them.**


	2. Who and What Are You?

**2. Who and What Are You?**

February 2010

London, England

Harry

I was reborn into a cacophony of scents. Much like my brother, Jasper, was reborn into a world of emotions, and my other brother, Edward, was reborn into a world of unwanted voices inside his head, I was reborn into a world where, like it or not, I could tell a person's true being by their scent. A world where the complexity of humanity, which can be seen in both those who still have it and those who think they shed it long ago, swirls around me endlessly.

All vampires rely on their sense of smell. It helps them hunt, and it warns them of danger. All vampires can tell you what blood smells like and what our kind smell like. All vampires have their own unique scent, but only to me can that scent be informative of who they really are, and only I can tell you what love smells like, what caring, devotion, friendliness, and loyalty smell like – all of them sweet and fragrant but each with their own unique tint. I can also tell you what deceit, selfishness, cruelness, and inconsideration smell like – all sour and musty, distinguishing them from the positive emotions, and each with their own individual twist. I could tell you the unique scent of nearly every personality trait the human, and therefore vampire, race possesses.

It had taken over a century, but I had learned how to catalogue it all and how to use my intuition for better or worse. It was how I knew when people shouldn't be trusted, like John or the Volturi. I had learned to predict people's actions based upon it. In over a century, I thought I had seen everything there was to see about the possibilities of the human psyche. I thought nothing could surprise me anymore. However, a dying girl in a London Tube station proved my so very wrong.

"Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow!" The girl's screams filled the air from the room next door and pulled me from my thoughts as I remembered why I came here.

"I think she just broke the world-record for number of times someone can say 'ow' repeatedly," Carlisle said dejectedly to me as I walked into the room. He was watching her thrash around on the bed with a guilty expression on his face. I felt yet another wash of guilt flood over me – after all I had been the one who insisted he changed her. His current scent matched the look on his face. There was the ever-present over-riding compassion, but it was mixed with self-doubt and self-loathing. I had to resist the urge to crinkle my nose at his scent. I tried to think of something to say to stop his obviously guilt-ridden thoughts but came up blank.

So instead I turned to watch the girl, too, concentrating on her intoxicating scent – the nicest I'd ever smelled. She was nicer even then that young girl in Italy, who'd smelled too nice to be allowed to live.

That had always been my problem – the nicer someone was, the more tempting his or her scent was to me. The scent of their personalities mixing with the scent of their blood to create a temptation more irrestible than any narcotic to a user. It had taken all the self-control I had built in the last few years to not kill the girl when I first caught her scent. If I had found her twenty years ago, there would have been no chance she would have survived. But as much as my throat as burned I had spent a decade ignoring it in that cave, I knew what it felt like to burn worse, therefore I had built up a tolerance no other vampire, aside from Carlisle, could wish to have.

For over a century I had struggled with my morals. I didn't want to kill genuinely good people. Much like my brothers, Edward and Jasper, I had no distance from my prey like the majority of my kind. I knew their true being and therefore knew if I was responsible for the death of a good person or a bad person. Unfortunately my instincts drew me to kill the very people I knew deserved to live. My first attempt to consume only the bad people was ruined by the little Italian girl's death. The realisation of what I'd done had caused my own self-imposed exile, which had ended when Carlisle had arrived and convinced me there was another way.

I truly was sorry for the decision I had forced him into, but I hadn't been thinking rationally as I stood at the bottom of those stairs. All I had been thinking of then was that I couldn't let another good person die.

"We did the right thing," I said firmly, trying to sound more confident then I felt. I had to raise my voice to be heard over her screams. "Her name's Amelia Jasmine Hunter," I informed Carlisle, throwing the plastic card in my hand at him. Carlisle looked at me questioningly. "Learner driver's licence," I explained.

"You went through her purse?" Carlisle said sounding slightly outraged. I had to avoid laughing as the scent of pretentiousness became just tangible before disappearing. I made a face to show my own distaste at what I'd done before giving a shrug.

"We needed to know her name."

A blast of music shrilled through the air. I followed the sound and disappeared through the door before returning a second later with her bag, which was the source of the music. I looked at it confused. I noticed Carlisle was trying to suppress a smirk at my baffled expressed before grabbing the bag and pulling the still ringing phone out of it.

"Home," he whispered softly. _Her parents were looking for her._ I tried not to think about the pain her disappearance would cause them. Without us she would have died anyway, but at least that way they could have had some sense of closure, while now they would never know what happened.

"Should we answer it?" I asked confused as to what we should do next.

"And say what?" Carlisle asked softly, as the music stopped, and he placed the phone down on the bedside table.

"Good point," I admitted. "I don't think 'your daughter's in the middle of being transformed into a vampire' would go down very well." Carlisle shot me a look that made it clear he did not appreciate my comment. On any normal day I would have already figured that out and not said it in the first place. Today, however, I was all out of sorts, not quite as intuitive as usual. The scent of self-loathing and self-doubt became heavier in the air; clearly my badly timed joke had had the opposite effect to my desire to lighten the atmosphere.

Amelia had continued her shouts and screams all through our conversation, and they were joined by the same blast of music as before. Both of us turned to stare at the phone until it stopped ringing.

"We should probably turn this off," I said picking it up again. I turned to Carlisle who gave a nod of consent. I fiddled with the phone for a few seconds before realising I had no idea what to do, so I reluctantly asked, "Erm … how would I do that?" Carlisle smirked at me as I threw the phone at him, and he turned it off with ease.

"Still not quite up-to-date with modern technology?" Carlisle said, trying to hide his amusement. Somewhat bizarrely, this teasing was accompanied by the scent of paternalism. Then again nearly everything Carlisle did when speaking to me or any of his 'children' was accompanied by the scent of paternalism. It had taken me a while in the beginning to get used to that; the fact that I had fought hard against it hadn't helped. I hadn't wanted a father. Or a mother. And definitely not any more siblings. But slowly I had realised that maybe a family was exactly what I needed. Well, this particular family anyway.

"I was out of the loop for ten years," I mumbled defensively. "Have you told her yet?" I asked, trying to get the conversation off me, and I inclined my head toward the screaming, thrashing girl on the bed. I instantly regretted it as self-doubt and self-loathing invaded the room again.

"I can't get a word in edgeways," Carlisle replied, all amusement disappearing from his tone. He then turned his attention toward the transforming girl. "Amelia, I know it hurts, but screaming doesn't help. It'll be over eventually. I need you to listen to me – I need to explain." His voice was coloured with desperation.

"Can't it wait until I'm not in burning pain and might actually be able to listen?" Amelia managed to get the question out between her screams. I had to try not to laugh; the slight change in her scent didn't get past me either.

"She makes a good point," I said. I found myself staring at her in wonderment again. "She's feisty and clever but self-pitying right now, yet it's all wrapped up around kind, loving, caring and friendly. Self-pity's usually such a bad trait, and yet she makes it smell good," I explained, Carlisle understood the delicacy of my talent.

"Four major personalities?"

"Like I said – she's the nicest person I ever met," I replied thoughtfully. Carlisle didn't reply to my statement, and I assumed that to mean he had nothing more to say.

In silence we both watched the burning girl. I found myself thinking about her future. _Would she understand? Would she take well to this life or react badly like Rosalie? Would she become my sister? Or something else?_ I surprised myself with that thought. I had always said that I'd had my one chance already. I wasn't looking for another. _Could I really get a second chance? Could she possibly think of me like that? Could I think of her like that? _As I breathed in her deliciously nice scent, I found myself considering it. But it was too early for anything like that.

_Amelia Jasmine Hunter - who will you become?_

*****  
Amelia  
I could hear their conversation, but it was like I was hearing it from a distance. I was too overridden with the immense pain to concentrate on listening to it. It'll be over soon, it'll be over soon. I hoped the so-called doctor knew what he was talking about. But I continued to scream even though I knew it would do me no good. Even if it did nothing to help the pain it was sort of a release for me, and it was much easier than trying not to scream.  
I remembered the words of the other man that I'd overheard. How does he know me like that? I thought He doesn't know me at all, yet he knows exactly what sort of person I am, and he calls me the 'nicest person I ever met'. Who is he?

_*****_

The fire in my body had stopped, but now my throat was burning. I assumed it was from all the screaming I had done in the last … actually I didn't know how long it had been. I had screamed until I could scream no more, but the pain had been so bad that I couldn't stay quiet long. The doctor and his companion had tried several times to explain something to me, but my screams had always cut them off. Like I'd said, managing to choke the words out between screams, I'd listen when I wasn't in burning pain. It seemed like a good plan to me.

_I need a drink_. All I could think of was a cool refreshing glass of water, and with that thought, I stood up and opened my eyes.

Whoa! Wow! The drugs, or whatever it was that the doctor had given me, had some really weird side effects. The world seemed brighter and louder. I briefly wondered if I was hallucinating. I'd never gotten high, but this was sort of what I imagined it would feel like. I could hear the doctor's voice; it sounded like he was talking to someone on the phone. I was surprised when I could also hear the replies of the woman he was speaking to, and from the way they spoke to each other, it sounded like it might have been his wife. _Strange. He must have it on loudspeaker_, I told myself dismissively, and with that my thoughts returned to the idea of a glass of water, and I decided to go and try and find the kitchen.

I didn't know how, but suddenly I found myself in the kitchen. _My mind's clearly not working right, I thought. This treatment has some seriously weird side effects. Then again, it was a seriously weird treatment. What was with the burning pain?_ I shuddered, not wanting to think about that and began concentrating on getting a drink. I pulled a glass out of a cupboard and then turned on the tap. The water smelled cold and inviting, and I took a sip.

I listened to the voices on the phone somewhere above me, as I stood drinking the water.

"Alice would to speak to you," the female voice, that I believed belonged to the doctor's wife, said.

"You might want to go into the kitchen," a different female voice said. I assumed this to be the Alice mentioned. How had she known I was in the kitchen? I mean she had to be talking about me, right? "You're not the only ones full of surprises." This Alice, whoever she was, sounded amused.

"Alice, what's going to happen?" This was the doctor's voice, sounding worried.

"You won't believe me," Alice's voice replied mysteriously. "Now go!" she ordered, and I heard the sound of a phone hanging up.

Suddenly the two men from the night of my fall were in the kitchen. I got my first proper look at them. Their skin was pale white, and they had weird golden eyes. I couldn't help but notice how cautious they appeared to be; they were almost acting like they were scared of me. Without thinking about it, I took another sip from the glass in my hand. They had been staring at me before, but now their eyes seemed to pop out in amazement. I wished they wouldn't – it made me feel like a side attraction at a freak show.

"Erm…hi," I said nervously, I didn't know what to say to them. My voice sounded different, almost musical. I assumed it to be just my hearing playing up – another weird side effect. I took another sip of the water, having found it helped to ease the soreness in my throat.

"Water won't help," the doctor informed me; he still sounded sad. I wondered why that was. _After all I had survived, hadn't I?_

"Why not? It seems to be working," I replied confused. I had hoped the water would help cool the pain in my throat, and it did. _Why would he think it wouldn't help? What kind of quack doctor was he anyway?_ The doctor scrunched his face up in confusion at my words. I didn't understand it in the slightest_. I had a sore throat so I got a drink of water to help – what was so confusing about that?_

"What does it taste like?" he asked as if her was intrigued.

"It tastes like …" I was thrown by the question. _What I weird thing to ask, surely everyone knew what water tasted like? And how do you explain what water tasted like anyway? There wasn't really a word for it._ "Well, like _water_, you know?" I finished lamely. Both the doctor and the other man looked incredulously at each other and then back at me. I didn't understand this at all. _What is so goddamn weird about getting a drink of water?_

"It tastes … _ok_?" the doctor asked unbelievingly. _Yes, the water tastes ok_. _What the hell was going on?_ I put the glass of water down, fed up with the weird interrogation about it.

"So what exactly was," I couldn't think of a word to describe it, "_all that_ about then? I mean I have to say it bloody hurt, but it's worked, didn't it. I mean, like," I paused, remembering I had no idea how long it had been. "How long ago was it you found me?"

"Two days," the doctor answered. He and his companion were still staring at me in disbelief. What was with that?

"Ok, well anyway, like erm, two days ago I was, like, well, dying and now, well, I feel great. I mean, it's like I never, well you know, got pushed down a flight of stairs. I mean, erm, I don't know what the hell you gave me, but it worked a bloody miracle. You should, like, pimp it out to the NHS or something, or like hospitals worldwide. I mean you'd make an absolute bloody fortune. I mean it, like, really fucking hurt, but it fixed in two days what would have taken months or, well, even years to fix, or wouldn't even have been fixable at all, meaning I would have been, you know, stuck in a wheelchair or something. That's if I didn't die to begin with, which I probably would have if you didn't find me. I should probably like, thank you for that, you know. So, like, thanks for, you know, not leaving me to die at the bottom of a flight of stairs. Who are you anyway? " I realised I was rambling due to my nerves and my confusion, and that I was making an idiot of myself, so I shut up.

"You're welcome," the doctor said sounding confused. I didn't blame him; even I couldn't make sense of what I'd just said. "I'm Dr. Carlisle Cullen, and this is my son, Harry." I looked at the man standing next to him. He didn't look less than four or five years younger than him. _How could he possibly be his son?_ However I completely forgot my confusion at their family situation as I suddenly remembered a much more pressing matter.

"Do my parents know what happened to me?" I asked. My mind suddenly filled with thoughts of them, though bizarrely, those thoughts were blurry, like seeing them through a fog. _Weird, weird, side effects_. I just knew they would be concerned for me, and I needed to speak to them right away, to let them know I was OK, and they didn't have to worry; they didn't need to be upset or hurt.

"Amelia, your parents can't know what happened," the doctor, Carlisle, told me sadly. "You can never see them again. I'm sorry." A sudden rush of anger filled me. _Who was he to say I couldn't see them again? Hadn't I wanted to survive to stop them from missing me – to protect them from the emotional pain that would cause them? So what was the point of surviving if it still caused them pain? I was going to see them again_.

"Where's my phone?" I snapped. I noticed that both men seemed to back away from me like I could hurt them. _As if. _Even in a temper, there was no chance that I - quite possibly the weakest girl alive - could possibly do anything to hurt two grown men. My distracted thoughts quickly returned to my original plan. I would phone my parents, and as soon as they knew I was alive, they'd come get me, no matter what the so-called doctor said. Any gratitude I had felt for him had disappeared when he had told me, no, _ordered me_, to never see my parents again.

"Amelia, you need to let me explain what's happened," the doctor said desperately. I supposed I could let him do that much – I was curious to know what had happened anyway. I nodded my consent. The doctor relaxed slightly but still seemed to be wary of me.

"When I saved you, I did something that changed what you are. You have to understand that it was the only thing I could do to stop you from dying." He sounded like he was trying to placate me, like he thought I would be angry with him for saving my life. _What could he possibly have done that would have been so bad I would be angry with him for not leaving me to die?_

"You're not … _human_ anymore. Neither am Harry nor I are. I've made you like us." He paused and stared at me as if to gauge my reaction. I was staring at him in shock, wondering where the hell this was going. "We're … _vampires. _I had to bite you to save your life. The venom healed you, but it also made you one of us." He stopped, waiting for my reaction. Slowly I processed what he was saying. I gave a giant laugh and suddenly I couldn't stop laughing.

Vampire. He'd just told me I was a vampire. It was the funniest thing I'd ever heard. So ridiculous I just couldn't stop laughing at the idea. And he'd said it so seriously, like he honestly believed it. _Someone should give that doctor an Oscar or something._

"Ok, honestly, what really happened?" I managed to finally stop laughing to ask the all-important question. _If he doesn't give me a proper answer this time, I'm so out of here_, my thoughts turned suddenly angry. Both the doctor and his son looked at each other worried.

"Amelia," the doctor said my name gently, "I'm telling the truth. You're a vampire." Visions of fangs, blood sucking, stakes, silver, holy water and burning in the sunlight filled my mind. _Vampire_, I snorted to myself. _This is absolutely fucking ridiculous._

"Ok, joke's not funny anymore. Tell me what's going on, or I'm out of here." After neither of them replied, I grew even more angry.

"Fine, fuck you both, I'm going home!" I shouted.

"Don't be such a goddamn idiot! If you go home you'll kill your entire family!" the doctor's son, Harry, shouted at me. It was the first time he'd spoken since he'd entered the kitchen.

"Harry!" the doctor scolded him.

"Well, what are we supposed to do? Just let her go home to kill all her loved ones like _they_ did with Sophia?" he shouted angrily, but there was also noticeable pain in his voice. I was growing quickly annoyed at his assumptions. _I would __**never**__ kill __**anyone**__!_

"Oh, I'll kill them, will I? Why? Because I'm a vampire?" I asked with heavy sarcasm.

"Yes!" he shouted back at me. "How do you not get that? I can tell you love your parents. I can tell you want to protect them. Trust me. Going home is not the way to do that!" He sounded like he was trying to help, like he honestly wanted to stop me from killing people. For a second I considered his words before remembering they were completely stupid. _Maybe he should get the Oscar for best supporting actor._

"Because I'm a vampire who's going to murder them all?" I asked sarcastically. I just couldn't take any of it seriously – it was just such a ridiculous notion.

"Yes," he replied staunchly.

"He's, we're telling you the truth, Amelia," the doctor said gently. _Okay, this joke, or prank, or whatever it was, had gone on long enough. Who saves someone's life and then uses the whole thing to pull some sort of sick stunt? Fucking freaks._

"Okay," I began calmly, "I don't want to be rude because you did save my life, even if you won't tell me how. But there is no polite way to say this, so screw it, I'll just have to be rude. Spare me the goddamn vampire bullshit, ok?Either tell me what the fuck is going on, or I'm so out of here."

"Amelia, put your hand on your chest," the doctor ordered. I raised an eyebrow at him sceptically. "Just humor me," he asked.

"Give me one good reason why I should?" I asked angrily, debating whether I should just leave right now.

"Because I didn't leave you to die alone at the bottom of a flight of stairs," the doctor replied patiently. _Humph, he had me there. Fine, I'd humour him_. I placed my hand on my chest. "Harry, go get a mirror," the doctor ordered, and his son disappeared out the door quicker then I'd ever seen anyone else move. "What do you feel?" the doctor asked me.

"Nothing," I replied irritated. What exactly was he doing?

"And what should you feel there?" he asked patiently, but he made it sound like he was explaining something to an idiot. I shrugged, not getting this bizarre new line of questioning. _What was he trying to do? Prove to me I was a vampire? _Even in my head it sounded ridiculous.

"Your heartbeat, Amelia, do you feel your heartbeat?" Suddenly I realised my heart wasn't beating. It hadn't beat since I had been in immense pain. _What the fuck?_

"What's going on? Why don't I have a heartbeat? What did you do to me?" Panic and delirium crept into my voice. _What was happening?_ I couldn't process any of it.

"Amelia, I already told you, you're -"

"DON'T TELL ME I'M A FUCKING VAMPIRE!" I screamed at him, even as I said it, I realised if I didn't have a heartbeat, I could very well be a vampire?

Harry returned carrying a mirror. He looked at the doctor who nodded at him, and then he passed it to me. Curiously I looked into it, dreading what I might see there. My skin was pale white, the same shade as the doctor's and his son's, and I was much more beautiful then I'd ever been. My brown curly hair looked sleek and glossy rather than it's usual frizzy mess, but my eyes ruined the effect. They weren't the odd but acceptable gold of the two men. My eyes were a terrifying, monstrous red. I jumped backward in shock, and I heard two smashing sounds. I realised I had not only dropped the mirror but had also destroyed the full-length cupboard behind me. Instead of it stopping me as I'd expect, I had smashed straight through it, as if it were paper. I stepped forward again, out of the Amelia-shaped hole in the cupboard.

I believed them then. If it was possible I didn't have a heartbeat. If it was possible for my eyes to be that monstrous red colour. If it was possible I could smash cupboards without any problem. Then it was possible for me to be a vampire. Hell, it was the only explanation I had.

"I'm a vampire," I whispered dejectedly.

"I'm sorry, Amelia," the doctor said gently. He then explained to me about vampires I gathered that about from needing blood to survive, that most of the myths were rubbish. He told me how he and his were 'vegetarian' vampires and lived off the blood of animals and not humans. My heart soared at the news. I didn't have to be a killer.

"You're welcome to join our family if you want, or you're free to go your own way if you'd prefer," the doctor finished his explanation. _Go my own way? And do what exactly? Kill people?_ I had to repress a shudder.

"I'll stay," I told them decisively. _I'll take the option that doesn't involve killing people, thank you very much._ Suddenly I remembered something.

"Wait a minute. You said that my throat burns for blood, and all I'll ever be able to drink is blood, right?" I asked cautiously. Both the doctor and his son nodded. "But I drank the water earlier and … it made my throat feel better. Actually it doesn't burn much at all." _Great, they were both staring at me like I belonged behind bars in a zoo again._

"That's very odd," the doctor admitted, sounding confused. A shiver of annoyance went through me.

"Sure, you tell me you're a 'vegetarian' doctor vampire, and I'm the odd one. Pots and kettles, Dr. Cullen, pots and kettles." I said, half-annoyed but half-joking. Harry gave a snort of laughter at that, and even the doctor gave a smile.

"Good point, Amelia. And you can call me Carlisle," he said. "Actually, if you don't mind, could you try and drink some again?" he asked, sounding curious. Picking up the glass and taking it to the sink took me less than a second. Now I knew what was going on, I marvelled at my vampire speed. Suddenly the time it took for the glass to fill seemed slow. Trying not to feel like a freak show attraction under their stares, I drank, the glass of water and felt the still present burn in my throat cool slightly.

"Amazing," the doctor, Carlisle, said in awe. I heard his son give a low chuckle. "I've never seen anything like it. I wonder if you can drink anything else but water?"

I was also somewhat curious. "Let's find out," I said chirpily. I was all for anything that didn't involve drinking blood. I went to open the refrigerator, but in my eagerness I ripped off the door. "Oops, sorry," I said shame-faced.

"It's ok. It'll take some time to get used to the extra strength. And we don't have anything in there anyway." He was right; I was looking inside an empty fridge. Cautiously I placed the door back into place.

"Just go," I heard Harry say to Carlisle. "I can tell you're dying for more information." Harry rolled his eyes Carlisle turned to address me.

"I'm going to buy some more human drinks so we can experiment. Stay here, and Harry will watch you." As much as I didn't appreciate being spoken to like a child, I understood that in many ways that was what I was now. A newborn, they'd called me. Carlisle disappeared out the front door, leaving Harry and me to stand in uncomfortable silence.

"I'm sorry I called you a goddamn idiot," he said sincerely.

"It's okay. I'm sorry I acted like a goddamn idiot," I replied. He gave a slight smile. "It's just seemed so ridiculous, you know?" He nodded.

"I didn't mean to shout at you – it was just the idea of you returning home to your family." He shuddered.

"Would I really have killed them all?" I asked, horrified by the very thought. They had explained that human blood would be irresistible to me in the beginning. "Maybe I would have been okay with the whole 'freak thing' going on. You know, the whole 'only vampire able to drink something other than blood thing'. Maybe I'll react differently." I saw a silver lining in the cloud that was the whole 'oh by the way you're a vampire' situation. Maybe one day I could see my family again. It would hurt them for a while, but one day I could go home and help heal the pain.

"You're willing to risk your family's lives on that possibility?" he spat out at me, his voice suddenly disgusted

"No," I whispered sadly, realising the truth behind his question. Maybe I could see my family again without killing them. But maybe I still couldn't.

"Sorry, I shouldn't have shouted at you," he said. He truly did sound sorry again. _What was going on with him?_ "You're not Sophia." He said this more to himself than me. I recalled him mentioning her earlier as well.

"Who's Sophia?" I asked, my sense of curiosity winning out over my sense of decorum.

"Just someone I used to know," he replied softly. It was clear it was something he didn't wish to discuss. I wished I'd kept my mouth shut.

Just then I heard the door close as Carlisle returned home. He carried several shopping bags.

"You know you can buy clothes at supermarkets now?" he asked sounding surprised.

"You've been able to for years." I found his surprise at this insignificant detail slightly amusing.

"Well, I haven't been inside a supermarket for decades. It's usually Esme who does our shopping."

"Shopping? Why would vampires need to shop?" I questioned curiously.

"To keep up appearances. It would appear very odd if a household of nine never bought any food," he explained. I guessed that made sense, seemed like a lot of hassle though. What a weird way for vampires to live.

"Anyway, I thought you might want something to wear other than …" His words trailed off. I looked down and realised I was still wearing my outfit from Katie's 18th party. The purple dress and leggings were shredded in places. They were also covered in dried blood. I fingered one of the patches of dry blood, as I did so I was hit by the most delicious smell ever.

"Amelia…" I heard Carlisle's voice say gently, pulling me out of my trance.

"What was that?" I asked. "Oh, wait, blood," I answered my own question. "Well, at least I didn't try to drink it."

"It's two days old and dried up, it would be impossible to drink. Only a newborn could find the smell even slightly appealing," Carlisle informed me. I realised the truthfulness of his words, the blood had appealed to me. The smell of it had anyway. Despite it being dried up, it had still filled me with a desire to drink blood. My own blood for that matter. The thought was repulsive to me.

"I should go get changed," I said, trying to hide my growing annoyance and repulsion. Carlisle passed me the bag containing clothes.

"There's a bathroom upstairs if you'd like a shower as well," he told me. Realising I was still covered in dried blood, I recognised how good an idea that was. I flew up the stairs and into the bathroom, again marvelling at my newfound speed.

I placed the bag of clothes in a corner and turned the shower on, breaking the nozzle in the process. I began trying to get undressed, but as I grabbed my dress to pull it over my head I felt it rip under my hands and an unbidden quiet growl came out of my mouth. Of course, I was now much stronger than I used to be and had to be much more careful. I didn't even bother trying to remove the leggings and shoes properly; I just ripped the leggings off and broke the straps of my heels. It wasn't like I ever planned to wear them again; it would be a bit morbid wearing the clothes I died in. Now there's a phrase you don't say everyday, then again neither is 'I'm a vampire'.

Finally fully undressed, I stood under the caressing shower of warm water and let my newly expanded mind drift, trying to process everything that had happened to me.

_I am apparently a blood-sucking vampire who can drink water as well but still finds the smell of blood appealing, even my own two-day-old dried up blood. I am a vampire. I am a vampire. I am a vampire._

_What the hell is Harry's problem? I mean what's with the whole flying off the wall one second to being oddly polite and remorseful the next. That kid has issues. And so do I for that matter. I am a blood-sucking vampire. One who can apparently also drink water. What is going on with me? What is going on with him for that matter either? _

*****  
Harry

I watched with amusement as Carlisle lined up his purchases: milk, orange and apple juice, Coca-Cola, lemonade, tea bags, and coffee granules. Curious intellectual scholarly Carlisle. Always seeking more knowledge, I was relieved to note that his scent had changed back to something more like his usual self.

"I've never seen or heard of anything like this," he told me. I hadn't either, I was nearly as curious as he was. But it wasn't just her 'freak thing', as she'd called it, which had caught my attention. It was _her _herself_. _

Even as she had shouted and swore at us, she hadn't meant it nastily, I could tell. She had been shy at first, but it had switched to confident; she was very confident that we were a pair of idiots. She had been temperamental, yes, but it wasn't the bad sort of temperamental - it disappeared too quickly. Self-confidence had switched to self-doubt the moment she'd realised she had no heartbeat. She had trusted us, then not trusted us, and then trusted us immensely again. The swapping between trust and mistrust was something I had experienced before, but she surprised me with the overwhelming strength of her trust when she did trust us.

In the short amount of time we'd been in that kitchen she'd been all that, as well as enthusiastic, curious, stubborn, decisive, protective, and naïve. While her four major personality traits had always stayed the same, as was normal (except people usually only have three), her minor ones had changed at a rate so fast it was unbelievable to me. Most people had only a few minor personality traits that came out in any abundance, and they were only provoked at certain times. Most of the time it was the difference in the strength of each trait in their main scent that helped me deduce what was going on. Amelia's minor personalities swirled around her and changed so quickly I couldn't keep up with her. I considered myself intuitive, and I can usually tell what someone is thinking or feeling by a swap in his or her personality traits, but she was unpredictable.

I couldn't blame her for how she had reacted. All she had wanted was to know what had happened to her and then be able to go home to her parents. It was a perfectly understandable wish. It wasn't her fault the news we had to give her wasn't good. But, even among the never-ending surprises she seemed to cause me, I had been surprised when she had become protective while discussing her return to her family. What did she want to protect them from? The only way to protect them was to stay away. The only thing they needed protecting from was her.

I had made a fool of myself, I knew. I shouldn't have shouted at her like that. But when she had mentioned returning home, anger had boiled out of me as I remembered what had happened last time a vampire had attempted that plan.

Sophia.

I had returned to Britain to speak to her for the first time in a century, but I had found I didn't have the courage to do so. I didn't want to revisit my past; not when I had finally found a brighter future. But even though I hadn't gone and spoken with her, my past had been heavy on my mind for the last few days. How could it not have been, when I had finally returned to the country of my birth? So when Amelia had mentioned going home, a century-and-a-half-old anger had spilled out of me. I should never have shouted at her. What happened then had nothing to do with her. She was just a confused child who wanted to see her parents again. But then again, that was exactly what Sophia had been as well, and a hundred and fifty years later I was still mad at her.

Amelia returned downstairs dressed in the jeans and T-shirt Carlisle had bought at the supermarket. Her scent was just as nice smelling, as kind, as loving, as caring, as friendly, as always. She was also enthusiastic, curious, and optimistic at this present moment, but that could swap very quickly as I'd already learned.

"You know, this is like the third outfit I tried on. All the others got ripped," she announced to Carlisle, surprisingly chirpy. I didn't miss that she seemed to purposefully not address it to me.

"Your new strength takes some getting used to – that's the reason I bought several different items so it doesn't matter if you rip them"

"Doesn't matter anyway, since Alice will probably burn that outfit or something once we get home," I said jokingly. She glared at me.

"I like it," she said with a hard edge to her voice. Defensiveness began creeping into her scent. Was there anything this girl wasn't? And would I ever be able to say the right thing to her – her unpredictability was throwing my usually intuitive self into the deep end, and I had no idea how to react around her.

"While I'm glad you appreciate my fashion choices, Harry's right. It came from a supermarket so Alice, while she probably won't burn it, will put it straight in the Goodwill pile. She's probably bought you an entire wardrobe of designer clothes by now," Carlisle said jokingly to defuse the situation, and then he looked at me clearly expecting some sort of explanation concerning her attitude. I shrugged, not wanting to explain that I'd shouted at her yet again.

"Who's Alice?" she asked Carlisle but glared at me. The look clearly said sarcastically, 'Am I allowed to ask that?'

"Alice is one of my daughters. She has what we call a talent - she can see the future," Carlisle explained. "And she loves to shop," he added, and Amelia nodded.

"She can see the future? That explains how she knew I was in the kitchen and how she knew you'd be surprised because I was drinking the water." Both Carlisle and I looked at her in confusion. "Oh sorry, I could hear you on the phone after I woke up," she explained. Self-doubt crept around her again – she was clearly debating whether she'd done something wrong.

"That's the downside of extra-sensitive hearing. Keeping things private is pretty much impossible," I told her, hoping to get across that it was fine. I had to resist the temptation to smile when the smell of self-doubt disappeared; I'd finally guessed something right about this mesmerising girl.

"You have to tell me all about your family… and their talents," Amelia said, curiosity flaring around her again.

"Of course. But if we could try to figure this out first," Carlisle said as he pointed to the array of human drinks lined up in front of us. Amelia smiled and picked up the glass she had used earlier. There was a swirl of self-doubt from her again; she must have been worried about it not working. She poured herself a glass of each of the first five drinks while we watched in amusement and astonishment as she drank each. As she drank each drink, the self-doubt was quickly replaced with more and more self-confidence.

"Shall I put the kettle on?" she said, pointing to the tea bags. Carlisle began quickly searching through the cupboards until he found what he was looking for. Why we even had a kettle here was beyond me. Amelia pulled a cup out of the cupboard and placed a teabag in it while the kettle boiled. "Do you have any sugar?" she asked us. We both looked at her in amazement before she said, "I take it that's a stupid question to ask a pair of vampires?" We both nodded silently, and I almost smiled as naivety briefly entered the room. She picked up the now boiling kettle and began pouring it into the cup; she then took the teabag out, poured some milk in, and stirred. She brought it to her mouth, but then pulled it away and placed it on the counter

"Don't you like?" Carlisle asked curiously, clearly wondering if we'd found her limit.

"No, I just don't want to burn my mouth. I'm waiting for it to cool down. So tell me more about your family," she said curiously. "So far, there's you two and a shopaholic psychic called Alice. Oh, and someone called Esme who does all your pretend shopping," she recalled. Carlisle smiled indulgently at her.

"There's my wife Esme and I, our children: Harry, Edward and Bella, Rosalie and Emmett, Alice and Jasper, our granddaughter, Renesmee and a … _friend_ of Bella and Renesmee's named Jacob." I smiled at his choice of words to explain Jacob's position in the family; it had taken me a while to get used to his presence in their household when I first joined.

"Wow, large family," Amelia said as she picked up her cup of tea and began drinking. She smiled at our astonished expressions. "Can't beat a good cup of tea," she informed us jokingly. "So are any of the other members of your family 'talented' like Alice?" she asked curiously.

"Yes. Edward can read minds." I sensed a sudden shot of secretiveness and defensiveness at those words; she didn't like the idea of someone reading her mind. I couldn't blame her for it since I had felt exactly the same way at first. But keeping secrets in the Cullen family was impossible. Carlisle continued without noticing her reaction. He wasn't, of course, getting distracted by weird scent changes caused by parts of her ever-changing personality coming to the forefront. "Bella is a shield. She can shield herself and others from mental talents. Jasper can feel and manipulate emotions. Renesmee can both break down other's shields and project her thoughts to others. And Harry can …" He looked at me, clearly expecting me to explain my talent.

"I can sense people's personality. What their main personality traits are; the ones that are always present, in everything you do, and also the more minor ones that come to the forefront as you're placed in different situations." It was the simplest explanation I had. Amelia was staring at me, the curiosity coming from her was increasing dramatically, but there was also self-doubt. I knew what she wanted to know.

"What's my personality like?" she asked me, just like I knew she would. I couldn't help but feel smug as I got confirmation that I had actually predicted something about her right, and for the second time in ten minutes as well.

"You're the nicest person I've ever met," I told her truthfully. There was no need to add 'and the most confusing and the most mesmerizing and the most unpredictable and the most bizarre'.

"You've said that before," she said and then paused. "When I was … dying." She winced at her words. "And burning."

"That's why I asked Carlisle to save you, because you were too good a person to die," I said softly.

"I know, I remember now," she said sadly. She was suddenly self-doubting again, however somehow she still made it seem good as it was wrapped up with caring. I wanted to ask her what was wrong, but she turned from me, pointing to the last thing in Carlisle's human drinks line.

"I don't like coffee," she said, putting the cup down. She was looking at me funny. Carlisle was watching us both intently, clearly trying to figure out the sudden change in mood.

"Would you like to hunt?" he asked Amelia gently.

"Hunt? Hunt what?" Amelia asked. Her naivety again came to the forefront.

"Animals." She continued to look at him like he was mad. "For their blood," he continued.

"Oh right, vampire, I forgot," she mumbled distractedly. "No thanks." She didn't sound impressed by the idea.

"Okay, I'm going to phone the airport then, we'll take the plane out of here tomorrow."

"Can I get on a plane?" she asked confused.

"We have a private plane," Carlisle explained.

"Vampires have private planes?" she asked unbelievingly.

"These vampires do!" I said jokingly. I was rewarded with a happy smile. It felt good making her smile.

* * *

**First off, yet another big thank you to Project Team Beta, who, again, helped make this chapter so much better than it was originally.**

**So what are your thoughts on Harry's 'talent' and Amelia's 'freak thing'? Reviews are always greatly appreciated.**


	3. Nice Surprising Surprise For The Family

**3. A 'Nice Surprising Surprise' For The Family**

February 2010

Astoria, Oregon 

Amelia

"They'll like you," Harry told me for the millionth time. We were sitting in the back of Carlisle's Mercedes, as he drove up a long driveway at about twice the speed he should have. Surprisingly, for someone who came across as such a gentle person, Carlisle drove like a bloody maniac.

I was, of course, worrying about how their family would react to me. I mean, what were they going to think when Carlisle and Harry brought some random newborn home? _What if they didn't like me? What if they were angry at Carlisle and Harry for bringing me here? What if they thought that I should have been left to die?_

"They'll like you," Harry said again. I knew he could sense my self-doubt. He had explained in more detail about how his talent worked during the long twelve-hour flight between Britain and America. It had been weird to leave Britain, when I knew I was never going back, at least not for a long time. Carlisle and Harry had explained a lot to me during that flight, giving me extra information about vampires that hadn't been given to me in the first explanation, where they had simply been trying to get me to believe them, and stop acting like a, as Harry put it, 'goddamn idiot'.

They had explained about the rules, the need for secrecy, and some weird bunch of vampires called the 'Volturi'. (I hadn't missed the way both their voices had hardened when they said that name.) They'd told me about the unique way in which their family lived among the humans. _Repeating high school, now there was something to look forward to - I think __not__. _They'd told me how Carlisle had managed to overcome his bloodlust to become a doctor, about Renesmee who was half-human, and Jacob who was a shape-shifting wolf.

They'd told me pretty much everything I'd asked about, and more, except one thing. After Carlisle had explained his past, I had asked about Harry's, but all he would tell me was that someone other then Carlisle had created him, and that he had found the Cullen family and joined it. I could tell there was more to the story then that, but I could also tell he didn't want to share. Having learned to ignore my curiosity after last time, I let it drop.

Harry and I had formed somewhat of an unspoken truce on that plane flight. After remembering that he had been the one to ask for me to be saved, I had felt guilty about being so petty to him when I had returned from my shower. He was clearly sorry for having shouted at me. Now I'd like to think we were becoming friends of some form or other.

The car stopped outside a large white house.

"Wow, posh!" I exclaimed.

"Wait until you see inside. Nobody does interior design quite like Esme," Harry whispered to me. In the rear-view mirror I saw Carlisle smile up front, clearly having heard Harry's compliment about his wife.

I could hear other voices too, from inside the house.

"Oh come on, Alice, what's the surprise?" a male voice asked enthusiastically.

"Didn't you hear the car pull up? They're back. We can finally find out what exactly the 'nice surprising surprise' is," another male voice said.

"Oh, Carlisle's home!" a female voice said happily. I recognised it as the same voice from the phone that I had thought belonged to Carlisle's wife, which would make her Esme.

"It's a very nice surprising surprise, you'll see," a second female voice trilled mysteriously. I recognised it as the voice of the woman called Alice, which I'd also heard on the phone.

"See, Alice already likes you," Harry whispered to me from across the backseat. As I recalled that Alice was the psychic, I found myself wondering what it was she had seen. Then almost instantly I realised she was referring to me. I must be the 'nice surprising surprise'. _She called me nice; she must like me_. Harry smiled at me, I wondered if my sudden optimism had caused a change in my 'minor personalities', as he called them.

Carlisle was already out of the car and was gathering some stuff from the boot. I was still seated in the back with Harry. Self-doubt had crept back over me, replacing my brief optimism.

"You have to meet them some time," he said gently to me. He was right. I would have to meet them all eventually if I was to stay with this family. _Please let them like me_, I hoped, as I opened the door and stepped out, crossing my fingers. I'm not particularly superstitious, but it was an old habit and it brought me some comfort, maybe because it felt like at least I was doing something to help myself, even if in the back of my mind I knew it wouldn't make a difference.

Instantly I felt something small and solid around my waist. I almost jumped backwards until I realised it was someone hugging me. She let go after a few seconds.

"Nice to finally meet you," she chimed happily.

"You must be Alice!" I said. She was quite small, less than five foot, with short sticky-up hair and an almost pixie-like quality to her. She was beautiful, of course, with the pale skin that all vampires share and the golden eyes that all 'vegetarian' vampires share, or so I'd been told. I liked her instantly. She was one of those people whom you like instantly without really knowing why.

I relaxed a little; maybe I really could fit in with this family.

I was instantly put on edge again when Alice was dragged back away from me by a blond male vampire, who stepped in front of her and looked at me menacingly, like he thought I was going to attack her or something. He was making it very clear what would happen if I did. The fact that he was covered in what appeared to be bite marks did nothing to temper this violent image of him.

I felt Harry move closer to me. I was surprised by how comforting it was to know he was close.

"Jasper, you overprotective fool, she's not going to hurt me," Alice said to her protector. Jasper – so that made him her husband. He was the one who could manipulate emotions, I recalled.

"She's a newborn, Alice," Jasper hissed. They way he said it was like an insult. What did that matter anyway? It wasn't like I was going to attack her – I liked Alice.

"Jazz, chill. Do you sense any aggression coming from her?" Jasper looked at me quizzically.

"No," he replied confused.

"Trust me, she's not like a normal newborn," Alice told him cheerfully.

"Appears nobody is nowadays," he muttered to himself.

"Trust us, Jasper, you've never seen anything like this before," Harry said from beside me. His voice was very close. Jasper simply glared at me. _Well, at least his wife appeared to like me._

"No really, Jazz, you haven't," Alice said chirpily. Then she disappeared into the large white house.

"Jasper. Emmett. This is Amelia," I heard Carlisle say.

Looking around me, I saw a muscular vampire was standing in the doorway watching the scene with interest. He seemed relaxed, unfazed by the events unfolding in his front yard. Carlisle stood by the back of the car, and I assumed the vampire in his arms was Esme. They were both also watching Jasper and me with interest, unlike the muscular vampire however, they both looked worried and cautious.

By the time I'd taken all this in Alice was back, holding a red drink can. _Time for the freak show again_. Happy as I was to have a way around the whole blood sucking part, I wished I could do it without being gawped at. I suddenly felt empathic with zoo animals.

"Alice, what are you doing?" the vampire in the doorway asked. "I still don't get why you specifically requested Esme buy a large multi-pack of Coke and a bag of teabags on her last shopping trip. Seriously, lil sis, I think you're finally losing it."

"Wait and see, Emmett. Wait and see. Have you not learned to never bet against me yet?" Alice said to him as she threw the can of Coke at me. I caught it with ease - got to love vampire reflexes - and opened it. Then, concentrating on the drink and not the staring vampires, I took several gulps.

"Aaah! Refreshing!" I said. If they were going to stare than I might as well give them a show.

"WOAH, what the FUCK?" Emmett shouted. _My feelings exactly mate_.

"Emmett, language," I heard Esme scold for somewhere to my left. _Oh she's going to love me_.

"Told you it was a surprising surprise," Alice giggled. "Now let's get you out of that 'supermarket bought' outfit," she said, grabbing me and pulling me towards the house.

"Told you!" Harry whispered in my ear.

Twenty minutes later, I was dressed head to toe in designer clothes. Alice, it seemed, was impossible to say no to. Carlisle had been right; in one of the Cullens' spare rooms, which was apparently going to my room now, there had been twenty (I counted) boxes of designer clothes. All bought by Alice, for me. It was overwhelming that someone should do that for me, especially considering I had never owned an item of designer clothing before. I had tried to persuade Alice that I couldn't accept them, but her reply had simply been, "you're my sister now, you better get use to designer clothes". The fact that she had called me her sister made me much happier then any designer clothes could do. She already accepted me as part of her family. She thought I belonged here.

I was stood looking out of the large glass wall in the Cullen's living room, taking in the amazing scenery with my enhanced eyesight (no need for contacts anymore), and wondering what the hell to do with myself next. Everyone had drifted off upstairs: Carlisle with Esme, Alice with Jasper, Harry and Emmett to their respective rooms. I had been informed that the other five Cullen family members were visiting a place called 'Forks' and would be back in a few weeks or so. I had resisted the temptation to ask if they were also going to be stopping at 'Spoons' on the way back, seriously though what a stupid name for a town, then again, I come from a country with a town called Cockermouth, so who I am to say anything.

_Great, more people I had to try and win over and have gawping at me like a freak._

"What's up world's freakiest vampire?" a booming voice asked me. I looked up to see Emmett smiling at me. I briefly wondered whether I should be offended by his nickname for me. Probably not. It was, after all, the truth.

"Just wondering what to do now," I answered truthfully.

"You any good at Wii?" he asked me excitedly.

"I think so," I replied, searching through my blurry human memories. I had played on one with my family. The memories caused a wave of sadness as I thought about my family, and then a wave of guilt as I realised that this was the first time I'd thought about them all day. It was weird that I could remember the amusing name of a town from a news report last year, but was losing memories of my family.

"Amelia, what's up?" Harry was suddenly at the top of the stairs looking down at me. Clearly my guilt over my parents had caused a personality switch.

"Nothing," I lied. The look he gave me clearly indicated he knew I was lying. "What games you got?" I asked Emmett.

"You ever played the retarded knitted cow game?" he asked me. I had to laugh at that.

"Erm…no," I replied.

Half an hour later the score stood at Amelia: 9, Emmett: 11. Harry was sat on the sofa watching and laughing at us and having an ongoing debate with us both about which of us was more competitive.

"Bro, I thought competitiveness was one of my main ones or something?" Emmett asked him, as we started our 21st game.

"It is, and yet she's still nearly as competitive as you," Harry said sounding amused. I ignored them both, concentrating on the game. On screen, Emmett ran into the back of my cow and sent it drifting to the right, I turned my controller left again, but I must have done it with too much force, as the wrist strap broke, and the controller went flying out of my hand. It smashed into a nearby wall with such force it left a dent, and the controller itself smashed into a million pieces.

"Oh shit!" I exclaimed. I noticed that the rest of the Cullens were now at the top of stairs, staring down at us.

"Emmett! What have I told you about being careful when you play on that?" Esme scolded.

"Sorry, Esme," he said apologetically. _That's not fair, he shouldn't have to take the blame._

"It wasn't Emmett's fault, Mrs. Cullen, it was my controller that went flying. I'm sorry," I said apologetically. Esme turned to look at me instead; she had a surprisingly soft and tender look on her face.

"It's okay dear, you don't know your own strength yet. And call me Esme," she said sweetly, smiling at me.

"I'll clean that up," I said, I standing up and flitting over to the broken pile of bits. "Erm… I don't know what you're going to do with that dent though, sorry."

"Don't worry about it, and I'll get that," Esme said before flitting off. She came back with a dustpan and brush.

"Go on, Jazz," I heard Alice whisper to her husband. I turned just in time to notice her prod him in the back. He descended the stairs and stopped at the bottom.

"Amelia," he said to me, but he didn't move any closer, clearly keeping his distance on purpose, "I'm sorry for how I behaved earlier."

"It's okay," I said, somewhat shyly. There was something about him that scared me slightly. Maybe it was the battle scars, or maybe just that he was the only Cullen who hadn't exactly been nice to me so far. Or a combination of both.

"She's not going to bite, Jasper," I heard Alice giggle. I giggled too, what a thing to say about a vampire. Jasper walked closer to me. He held out his right hand and we shook.

"Welcome to the family, Miss Amelia," he said politely. Alice danced over to his side. She grabbed hold of his hand before it could return to his side.

"Yes, welcome to the family," Esme said kindly, returning from throwing the broken pieces of Wii remote away. She pulled me into a gentle hug.

"Thank you." I smiled at them both as Esme released me. I noticed my throat was burning slightly again.

"I'm off to get a cup of tea. Would anybody else like one?" I asked. It had been an unspoken rule in my family that you couldn't make a hot drink without offering everyone one. All six of them looked at me like I was mad, and slowly it dawned on me what I'd just said, and whom I'd said it to. "Stupid question right?" They all nodded at me, and then Emmett gave a booming laugh and we all joined in. I had just offered to make six vampires a cup of tea – it was fairly ridiculous.

* * *

**As always, a big thank you to everyone at Project Team Beta.**

**A/N: 1) On the off chance that anybody from the town of Cockermouth reads this (very slim I know), I mean no disrespect to anyone affected by the floods last year. However, all the Brits reading this will probably admit that, as serious as the news report was, you had a little giggle to yourself first time you heard the name.**

**2) 'Retarded knitted cow game' – anyone who owns a copy of Wii Play should understand which game that is.**

**Anyway reviews are always appreciated. What did you think of Amelia's first meeting with the Cullens?**

**Don't worry, Edward, Bella, Rosalie, Nessie, and Jacob all show up as well. Just not for a few more chapters.**


	4. Psychology, Hunting, and Secrets

**4. Psychology, Hunting, and Secrets**

March 2010

Astoria, Oregon

_Harry_

"When are Edward, Rosalie and the rest coming back from Forks?" I asked Carlisle. They had gone there at the same time that Carlisle and I had left for Britain two weeks ago. Jacob's father Billy, had diabetes had taken a turn for the worse, and he had wanted one last chance to visit him. Bella, Edward, and Nessie were going to support him and to also visit Bella's father, Charlie, and stepmother, Sue. Rosalie had gone with them on the hope that, as Jacob would be busy with his father, she could get some wolf-free time with Nessie or to, watch Nessie while Jacob, Bella, and Edward were busy with their families, as she'd put it. As far as the good people at Astoria High School knew, Edward, Bella, and Rosalie had all decided to spend some time with their 'birth families'. Renesmee and Jacob were not even known about in the town. The presence of a Quileute obsessed with a rapidly developing twelve year old being something we did not wish to have to explain to the humans.

"Edward said they would be coming home in about month, but Jacob may be staying a little longer with his father," Carlisle answered. There was a pause. "Amelia seems to be fitting in well with the family."

We were sitting in his office, as we were both working on trying to figure out exactly what she was. Carlisle wanted to know how she could consume fluid other than blood. I wanted to figure out what was going on with her personalities.

"Yeah," I said. It was true. Amelia had slotted into our family with ease; she was so likeable it was unsurprising.

Alice adored her. A sister, as she already called her, who loved to talk about fashion and such topics, but had the easygoing nature that Rosalie lacked. As Alice summed her up 'she's like the perfect mash-up of both Rosalie and Bella.' Jasper liked her simply because Alice did. Esme was fawning over her new daughter. Emmett enjoyed having someone who was willing to play games with him and didn't get bored. Carlisle liked how well she fit in with everyone. I just liked having her around.

The last I'd seen her she had been downstairs with Esme, discussing the new plans for the house. Since my brothers, sister and I were at the school during the day, and Carlisle was often at the hospital, it was left to Esme to watch our newest family member. As she was still a newborn (albeit a bizarre one) she was subject to the house arrest that Carlisle asked every newborn member of his family to abide by. So far Amelia had insisted on helping Esme redecorate and was also quickly devouring every novel Esme owned, I could tell that as soon as Bella got home she would quickly move on to reading all her books as well. She could read at a speed unlike anything I'd ever seen before, even other vampires. When I'd mentioned it to her, she had simply shrugged and said she'd read fast as a human as well. Esme enjoyed having a 'child' who actually was little more then a child, and the two were fast building a mother-daughter relationship.

"I still don't understand it though," I said to Carlisle.

"The drinking or the personalities?" he asked.

"Well both, but I'll leave it to you to obsess over figuring out her drinking."

Over the past century and a half, I had worked on my theory of how people's personality reflects them, and how vampires bring their human personality with them into this new existence.

Vampires who bring a supernatural or physical trait with them through transformation have three major personality traits; these never change and are what make up their scent to me. However, some vampires bring a personality trait with them instead, and they have only one major personality trait, but it is much more influential on their behaviour.

Carlisle and Esme are classic examples of this. Carlisle brought compassion with him, but it was increased in transformation to a point where it is way beyond human compassion. Esme brought the ability to love with her; her one major personality is loving, but she is able to do it with a passion beyond any human heart.

The rest of the vampires in my family all brought a supernatural or physical trait with them, and so all have three major personality traits.

All eight of them also have several recurring minor personality traits; these influence their behaviour nearly as much as their major personality trait or traits.

Now quite often someone's actions can reflect his or her minor personalities more then their major ones. It all depends what their major personalities are. For example, Rosalie's defensiveness causes her to use her vanity, self-loathing and stubbornness as a shield.

Renesmee has major personality traits that reflect those of both her parents.

Jacob on the other hand is more human-like in his personality. Humans also have three major personality traits, but they are much less defined then vampires, as humans can still change. Jacob's personality is more defined then a human but less defined than a vampire..

Of course they all also have minor personality traits that only appear ever so often in different situations.

Then there was Amelia. She had four major personality traits and the most intoxicating scent I'd ever smelled. She had so many minor personality traits they appeared and disappeared too quickly for me to keep up, predict, or understand. She was quickly becoming my own personal mystery.

"FUCK! FUCKING FUCKING FUCKITY FUCK FUCK!" The angry outburst filled the silence that had quickly settled, as Carlisle and I got lost in our own personal musings.

"DAMNIT! DAMNIT! DAMNIT! DAMNIT!" Both Carlisle and I looked at each other questioningly, wondering what on Earth could have fuelled the Amelia's angry outburst. Without a word we rushed out of the study and into the kitchen, arriving next to a confused-looking Esme, who was watching Amelia shout and swear at what appeared to be a cup of tea, a glass of water, and a can of Coke. Carlisle moved to stand beside his wife.

"FUCK IT!" Amelia shouted, crossing her arms angrily.

"Amelia, what's wrong?" Esme asked gently from her place in Carlisle's arms.

"I've drunk, like twenty million glasses of each drink in this house, and my throat is still fucking killing me," she growled angrily. She was self-doubting again but also being stubborn and pessimistic. The last one surprised me; I had only ever sensed optimism off of her. Generally speaking people didn't have contradicting personalities. You were either an optimist or a pessimist - you couldn't be both. But then again this was Amelia – the girl who didn't follow any of the rules, either my own or those of vampirism.

"I think I'm thirsty," she said dejectedly; we all looked at her confused. "You know, like, you people sorta thirsty." Realisation dawned on us all then. For the past month Amelia had stubbornly refused every time anyone asked if she'd like to hunt. You didn't need to be intuitive to realise the idea was repulsive to her.

"It's ok, Amelia. It's to be expected," Carlisle said gently.

"But I thought I'd got out of it," she replied, sounding sadder then I'd ever heard her. My heart swelled with pity at the sound. I was overtaken by a desire to pull her close and make her feel better.

"It'll be ok dear. It's awkward the first time, but you get used to it," Esme said kindly.

"It's really not that bad, believe me," I said.

"But the idea of killing some poor little animal," Amelia said sounding disgusted. She gave a little shiver at the end of her sentence.

"Amelia, you weren't an actual vegetarian as a human were you?" Carlisle asked quizzically. Oh the irony if that were true.

"What? No. It's just, you know," she paused then as if she wasn't certain whether to finish her sentence or not, "my meat came in a packet from the supermarket – I didn't have to actually kill it." She shuddered again. A smile crept on to my face, and I had to try my hardest not to laugh, knowing it would just aggravate her more. I didn't have to turn round to know Carlisle and Esme were doing the same.

"Well, the others only left to hunt a couple of hours ago. Harry, do you think you could take Amelia to catch up with them?" Carlisle asked me.

"Sure," I replied, smiling at her. She smiled back, but I could tell it was forced.

_Well, this should be interesting to say the least._

* * *

_Amelia_

_What's the point of being a freak if it doesn't even come in useful?_

Harry and I ran through the forest. This was the first chance I had had to run at full vampire speed; it was mesmerizing. I had to marvel at my newfound abilities. Unfortunately, there were also downsides to being a vampire. For example, there's the whole blood sucking thing, which it appears I haven't sidestepped after all.

Suddenly a scent on the wind caught my attention.

"Elk," I heard Harry say beside me. I could hear the heartbeats of the herd. I was being pulled forward toward the sound and their scent. Before I knew it I had jumped on the back of one, and my teeth were clamped around its neck. I wasn't thinking about it; I was just doing. I drained the animal dry before chasing after the rest of herd, catching a straggler and bringing it down too. This all happened quicker than I could have imagined.

It felt like it was a stranger doing it, not me. It was almost like having an out of body experience. I could look back at what I'd done, but I couldn't wrap my head around the fact that it was I who had done those things. That girl, that creature, that had killed those two defenseless animals with such ease – she wasn't me. SHE COULDN'T BE ME SHE

"Amelia?" I heard Harry's worried voice. I briefly wondered what my 'personalities' were up to now. "Amelia?" he repeated.

"Did I really do that?" I asked disbelievingly. "That didn't feel like me. It felt like someone else." He was looking at me like I'd lost my mind.

"When we hunt we have to give in to our instincts – to the more vampiristic side of us," he explained. Was that why I felt so disconcerted? From the minute I woke up, I had still felt distinctly human, but just now I had acted like nothing more than an animal.

"Oh … ok," I replied lamely, not knowing what else to say. It scared me – this vampire version of me.

"Maybe we should try and catch up with the others. Their trail leads east. Do you smell it?" I gave a slight sniff and smelled the now somewhat familiar scents of Alice, Jasper, and Emmett. I was distracted when a trickle of sunlight came through the trees above us. It reminded me of something I wanted to see.

"What have you spotted?" Harry asked me. I looked at him quizzically. "You're curious," he explained.

"Sunlight," I replied. "I want to see what I look like in the sunlight." Before he could reply I flitted over to the stream of sunlight and purposefully stood in it. Despite having been told what to expect, I was still amazed when my skin shone like a million diamonds. It was fascinating to just stare at my own hand and watch it glisten.

"You look wonderful," Harry whispered to me. I wouldn't have heard it without my new sensitive hearing.

Suddenly intrigued, I had an idea. Before he could even guess what was happening, I zoomed over, grabbed his hand and pulled him into the sunlight. Then I let go and stepped out to have a look at him. His entire skin glistened in the sunlight. His entire being was like looking at sculptured diamond. It was a dazzling effect. If I had thought the vampires were beautiful before, it was nothing compared to now.

"How do I look?" he asked jokingly, giving a mock twirl in the sunlight.

"Beautiful," I whispered the truth without thinking about it. He reached across and grabbed my hand, pulling me back into the sunlight.

"So do you," he whispered, staring at me.

I didn't know what to say or do next. There was a sudden tension in the air, caused by how close we were standing in the thin stream of sunlight. Seconds dragged on as we both stood there glittering. I noticed he was still holding my hand, and I realised I didn't want him to let go. He just stood there staring at me like a man who'd never seen the sun before. He took a small step closer, and I found I didn't go backwards as I usually would. I didn't want to. I was staring at his face, the golden eyes surrounded by his glistening skin, the overall effect so entrancing I couldn't look away. Timidly, I took a careful step closer myself, mesmerised by the glittering diamond chasms of his face. His hand reached out and gently stroked my face, and my skin tingled at his touch. I watched him closely, concentrating on his golden eyes, the only part that wasn't sparkling, as our faces drew closer.

Next thing I knew I was flying through the forest, propelled forward by a scent much sweeter than the elk's had been, oblivious to anything else around me. Before I knew what I was doing, I was attacking a large grizzly bear. The bear put up more of a fight than the elk. It took a few swipes at me. I briefly noticed their ineffectiveness before my teeth were clamped against its neck, and I was draining it dry of blood. Only when the last drop was drained did I regain control over my own mind and body. Only then did I remember about Harry left alone in that stream of sunlight.

"Amelia?" I heard him say. He must have followed me; he used the same worried tone as before.

"I don't know what's happening to me!" I wailed as I collapsed onto the forest floor

"You're a vampire," he replied softly.

Only then did the truth of that statement finally impact me. Only then did I realise that, though I had accepted that the Cullens were vampires, up until this point I hadn't accepted that I was truly one. That I would have to spend all of eternity as a blood sucking monster. Up until now I had subconsciously still considered myself something different than them. Despite accepting the vampire explanation, I had still thought of myself as human in a way. There had been a line in my subconscious, with the 'actual' vampires on one side and me on the other, considered a vampire but not really one.

"Amelia?" Harry was sounding more frantic now. God knows what my realisation was doing to my 'personalities'. Well I wasn't explaining myself to him. He'd probably just laugh at my naivety.

"Let's go home," I ordered decisively, looking up at Harry. As soon as I looked at him, he looked away, deliberately not holding my gaze. _Who did he think he was?_ Without even thinking about it I hissed at him and found myself in a crouch.

"Look at me," I growled. He reluctantly turned to me and then turned away from me again almost instantly. Then he began unbuttoning his shirt. _What the fuck does he think he's doing?_ I thought angrily. Another hiss came involuntarily from my mouth. _If he comes anywhere near me I'll make him pay._ The defensive thoughts came unbidden from nowhere.

"Here, you might want to cover up," he said gently to me. He threw his shirt at me without turning to look at me. I looked down and saw the massive rips in my dress, undoubtedly caused by my tussle with the grizzly bear. I quickly put his shirt on, feeling more and more embarrassed about my earlier behaviour. _What had come over me?_ Just like when I had hunted it had felt like a different person had done it. Amelia the vampire, not Amelia Jasmine Hunter.

"Would you like to hunt some more?" Harry asked gently. Now that I was covered up he was looking at me again. Even in my current state of despair, I couldn't help but notice the firm tautness of his chest and arms as he stood there shirtless.

"No!" I replied quickly, barely containing a shudder at the thought of the return of vampire Amelia. "Let's go home," I repeated, and then I set off running back toward the large white house before he could say anything.

The run back wasn't enjoyable like the run there; it was just another reminder of what I now was. Harry said nothing to me, and I said nothing to him, and so we ran in uncomfortable silence. Neither of us brought up what had happened, either before or after the bear had distracted me.

After about ten minutes of running we arrived back at the large white house. I could hear Carlisle and Esme watching the news inside, I could just hear the sound of the reporter, but it was too quiet for me to fully hear the story.

Carlisle instantly turned the TV off as we came through the front door. Weirdly Esme and he had a somewhat guilty look on their faces, like they'd been caught watching something they shouldn't. _What was that about? They'd been watching the news for God's sake. It's not like we'd walked in on them watching porn._ I quickly shook my head to dispel that bizarre image. Harry glanced at me curiously, but I sure as hell wasn't going to explain my current train of thought to him.

"You're back quickly," Carlisle addressed us, sounding surprised. "What happened?"

"Amelia didn't want to hunt anymore," Harry explained.

"How's your throat?" Carlisle asked me. I got the feeling he was dancing around something.

"Fine," I replied. I hadn't thought about it until now, but I realised it felt better than it had in weeks, though it still burned slightly.

"So … erm," Carlisle began to say something but stopped, looking uncomfortable.

"What happened to your dress, Amelia?" Esme asked softly. I had forgotten about my ripped dress and the fact that I was wearing Harry's shirt. That at least explained Carlisle's discomfort. I wondered what he thought had happened. I wondered what would have happened if that grizzly bear hadn't distracted me?

Harry was looking at me quizzically again.

"Oh you know, my dress got into a bit of an argument with a grizzly bear," I said jokingly.

"And?" Esme prompted.

And … I acted like a terrifying animal. And … I made a fool of myself. And … I really am a fricking vampire and it scares the living (or not so living) daylights out of me.

"Well, put it this way: the bear won the argument, but I won the fight." I forced a smile. Carlisle and Esme instantly relaxed.

"Have the others not come back yet?" Harry asked. Carlisle and Esme both shook their heads.

"So, what's going on in the world?" I asked them. They both looked at me confused. "I was just wondering what was on the news," I explained. _Also I'd like to know why you were acting so weird about being caught watching it_

"Oh, just someone complaining about Obama and some sport star who's been cheating on his wife," Carlisle replied calmly.

"Nothing of interest," Esme chimed in quickly … a little too quickly. I didn't know why, but I had a feeling they were lying. _Why were they lying to me?_ I wished they wouldn't. Whatever it was they were hiding from me, they should just tell me the truth.

Just then, a funny feeling came over me. It was like something was building up inside my own head but couldn't quite get out.

"Ow!" Esme said, rubbing her forehead. So it wasn't just me then.

"Esme?" Carlisle said worryingly, grabbing his wife's wrists and looking at her face. "You okay?"

"Yeah, I think so," she answered, sounding confused. "My head it just … hurt. Like something was pressing against it. I'm fine now."

"Let me take a look at you," Carlisle insisted.

"No, I'm fine," Esme replied, still sounding confused. Carlisle didn't look like he was buying it.

"Just like me take a look at you," Carlisle insisted again, and the two of them headed up toward his office.

I wasn't even going to mention my own bizarre headache. It hadn't been like something pressing against it anyway; it had been more like there was something trying to get out.

Confused, angry, and annoyed, I just wanted to get away from them all.

"I'm going to go read," I announced before flitting off upstairs and into the room Alice had prepared for me, in which I had several of Esme's novels stacked on a shelf.

I could hear Carlisle and Esme in his office, he was panicking other her headache, and I heard Harry go upstairs and ask if they had found out what was wrong. I blocked out the rest of the conversation, not caring what else they wished to talk about. _Probably about me anyway_, I thought angrily before flipping a book open with such force that I heard the binding tear. At this moment in time I didn't care about ruining Esme's book. _She's just a stupid, lying vampire like the rest of them_, I grumbled.

Within half an hour I had finished the entire book. I had heard the other three as they returned from their own hunting trip about twenty minutes ago. I was about to go downstairs and join them when I realised I hadn't changed. Quickly, I took off Harry's shirt and discarded it onto the floor, and then I changed my dress for another one of the million Alice had bought me. _It had been kind of nice of him to give me his shirt. It wasn't his fault I was in the middle of some random 'oh shit I really actually am a vampire' meltdown._ I picked the shirt up, deciding the least I could do was return it.

I knocked on his door nervously.

"Yes?" I heard him reply from within, and I heard the muffled sound of a book shutting. I opened the door and held the shirt up and then threw it at him. He was sitting on the floor with a large leather book on his lap.

"Thanks," I said. _I really should apologize__ for acting like an idiot, but how to bring it up?_

"Look I'm sorry, for, you know, what happened," I blathered, unsure of what to say.

"It's ok." He smiled at me tentatively. I didn't know what to say next, so instead I looked around his room uncomfortably. The first thing that caught my eye was a wall covered in pictures. They were beautifully painted – it was almost like looking at photographs. I stared at them, mesmerized.

"They're amazing," I said. "Where did you get them?" I asked, as I looked at the signature of one of them. _HLC_. Quickly scanning them I noticed that, aside from a few that had only _HL _on them, they were all signed the same.

"I did them myself," he replied. Of course, HLC: Harry Leone Cullen.

Looking closer I realized that I recognized some of the people in them. Carlisle, Esme, Alice, Jasper, and Emmett. There were other recurring golden-eyed vampires I didn't recognize: a bronze-haired male vampire who always seemed to be accompanied by a brunette and a human-looking child with the same strangely coloured hair, a statuesque blonde who always seemed to be beside Emmett in the pictures, and there was also a Native American. I knew who they were by the descriptions I'd been given of them, though I was yet to meet them: Edward, Bella, Renesmee, Rosalie, and Jacob.

But there were also others who featured prominently in the pictures, but I don't think had been mentioned to me, as I couldn't place whom they could be. The most prominent of them was a red-eyed female vampire with the same sandy-coloured hair as Harry, often beside a black-haired, red-eyed male vampire (whoever he was, it was clear by the way Harry drew him that he didn't like him). Another red-eyed female vampire, who even in the picture seemed to have an immense presence, appeared in a few, often in relation to a cave, darkness and Carlisle.

There were also several humans. A woman was the most common of them, she had brown curly hair and startling blue eyes, she was sometimes drawn alone, but more often she was drawn with a young girl beside her and a baby in her arms, in some of these pictures she was clearly pregnant with another. There was a grieving tone to those pictures. There was a young girl who shared the sandy-hair of both Harry and the red-eyed vampire. There was another young girl who had black wavy hair and deep brown eyes; by the way she'd been drawn I could tell something regretful happened to her.

"You never mentioned you could draw," I said, not looking away from the pictures. I avoided the temptation to ask who and what some of the pictures were about. Looking at them closely, there was a definite difference between the pictures with the Cullens in and the pictures without them. Somehow the pictures that featured the Cullens seemed happy and hopeful, while the others seemed dark and depressed.

"It never seemed important," he replied. I was startled by how close his voice was. I had been so entranced by the pictures I hadn't noticed he had moved to stand beside me. _How long had I stood here staring?_

My eyes flickered to the book that now lay on the floor where he sat. I now recognized it as a sketchbook.

"What are you drawing now?" I asked curiously, flitting over to pick the book up.

"Nothing of interest," he replied calmly, though the calmness seemed forced. He had followed me so quickly that I was certain it was only because of my newborn speed that I beat him to it. I went to open it, but he roughly grabbed it from me.

"I only wanted to look," I snapped defensively.

"Well maybe you should have asked," he replied haughtily.

"Fine! Sorry!" I snapped back. I had had it with everyone acting weird and secretive and stormed out at vampire speed without thinking about where I was heading. I came to a stop in the middle of the living room. _Stupid, secretive vampires!_ I seethed to myself. Spotting Carlisle and Esme now sat on the sofa again, my anger increased more. Then suddenly I felt myself calm down unexpectantly.

"I heard you got into a fight with a bear today!" The booming enthusiastic voice of Emmett cut across my internal grumbling.

"Yeah," I said calmly. I was surprised when I remained calm even when thinking about that terrifying hunt. Bizarrely, I was no longer worried about it.

"Jealous, Em?" Jasper asked jokingly. He was looking at me weirdly – the same way Harry did when I assumed my 'personalities' were acting oddly. I guess my emotions were acting strange now as well. To start with, what was with the peculiar calmness all of a sudden? Wait a minute, was the damn empath playing with my emotions? I'd been warned about that. To my surprise, I found that it didn't annoy me. Wait another minute; I wasn't annoyed because he wasn't letting me be annoyed. And as annoying as that was as well, I couldn't be annoyed about it.

"Yeah, man!" Emmett replied to Jasper.

"Jasper, are you playing with my emotions?" I asked calmly.

"Sorry," he said apologetically. I felt the calm leave me and be replaced with the annoyance I hadn't been able to feel under his influence.

"What's wrong?" he asked kindly.

"Doesn't matter," I snapped back. I had to resist the urge to throw a dirty look at either the floor above me where Harry was or to the right of me where Carlisle and Esme sat. A second later guilt flooded me for snapping at him for no reason when he was simply being kind. I should apologize to him. I seemed to be doing that a lot today.

"Apology accepted," he said to me. I was briefly confused before realizing he had been able to sense my guilt.

Across the room Emmett and Alice were having an ongoing conversation. "It's been seventy-five years since that bear beat you, Emmett. Maybe now's the time to, I dunno, let it go," I heard Alice say . The other four in the room laughed at that. I was confused – beating the bear had been so easy with my new vampire body. How had Emmett lost?

"Emmett, how'd you –," I began to ask but was cut off by Alice.

"Emmett was mauled by a bear as a human. Rosalie found him and brought him to Carlisle," Alice explained. This caught my interest again. I knew what had happened to Carlisle, as he'd explained on the plane, and I now knew what had happened to Emmett. _What were the rest of the Cullens' stories?_

"Pull up a chair, and we'll tell you," Alice replied, clearly predicting my question. "She wants to know all our backgrounds," she explained to the others.

"Can I go get a drink, first?" I asked. The draw of something as human as sitting and drinking a cup of tea while I listened was compelling after my 'vampire Amelia' moments this afternoon. "Does anyone else …" I stopped myself just in time, stupid ingrained human manners, and flitted to the kitchen before anyone could make a joke about it. I was not in the mood to be the butt of the joke.

As I waited for the kettle to boil, I found myself thinking about Alice. _Had she foreseen what had happened during my hunt? She said her visions changed as decisions were made. Had she seen what would have happened if I hadn't chased the bear? Did I have the nerve to ask her? _The answer to that question was a resounding no.

I sat and drank my cup of tea as first Esme, and then Alice, and then finally Jasper explained to me how they had come into this life. Esme's story filled me with pity – any anger I had toward her quickly disappeared, and I promised myself then and there that I would do all I could to be a daughter for her. Jasper's early beginnings horrified me; the thought of the barbaric nature of vampires scared me senseless after what had happened today. Alice and Jasper's love story appealed to the old romantic in me that just wanted to go 'aww'.

But overall, I couldn't stop concentrating on how the tea didn't taste as nice as it used to. Not now that I'd had the sweet taste of fresh blood on my tongue.


	5. Guilt All Round

**5. Guilt All Round**

April 2010

Astoria, Oregon

_Amelia_

"The search continues for missing eighteen year-old Amelia Hunter,"the news reporter started his report.

The Cullens were out hunting. I had refused to join them, as I had done every time they'd offered in the last month. I would fake-smile my way through Carlisle's patient questioning and Esme's gentle attempts at persuasion. I would laugh along at Emmett's jokes about my refusal. I would make sure to hide my fear in front of Jasper. And I simply ignored Harry.

So they went to hunt, and I sat down to watch TV. Flicking at vampire speed, which was undeniable fun, through the hundreds of channels on the Cullen's TV, I had been intrigued upon finding the BBC news channel. BBC. It reminded me of home. Of Britain. Of my human life. It turned out to be a much bigger reminder of my human life than I had expected.

I watched as my mother and father pleaded for my safe return. "We and her little brother and sister miss her very much." Guilt flooded me as a picture of me with my three-year old brother and one-year old sister appeared on screen, followed by a shot of my parents crying. I had wanted to save them from this pain, but there was nothing I could do.

I wiped away the tears that flowed down my cheeks. Venom tears – a reminder of what I was now. The fact that I could cry at all was a reminder of what _I_ specifically was: 'Amelia - the world's freakiest vampire'. I wasn't Amelia Hunter anymore. But the people who still loved the girl I used to be continued to search for her. _But they will never find her, me._

Now I knew what Carlisle and Esme had been so desperate to hide from me the day I returned from my first hunt. The last drop of anger I had felt towards them quickly melted away. Listening to Esme's back-story had washed away any ill feelings I felt towards her. Though they had returned briefly, it was impossible to stay angry with either her or Carlisle, when they had been nothing but kind and supporting since the day I woke up to this new life.

Harry, however, I could remain angry at. _What the hell was his problem? _I asked myself this over and over again; obsessing over it slightly, to be honest. He kept changing from being perfectly nice to shouting at me, and I could never tell why.

_And he claims I'm unpredictable?_

As the news report continued, I considered what would happen if I simply phoned home and told them I was OK. I had my home number memorized from a young age, to the point where I could rattle it off without thinking about it. This meant that even now, when I was forgetting so much, it was still there.

_Just one phone call couldn't hurt anyone._

Except it would, because how could I tell my family I was OK, but couldn't ever come back, without hurting them more? It was better for them to think me missing and then, eventually, presumed dead. Guilt and grief washed over me as I came to my realisation. I couldn't help them. I couldn't stop their hurt. As much as I may want to, I was powerless to do anything to help them. I couldn't even give them a phone call.

Suddenly anger flared up inside me as the news story continued. Three familiar faces came onto the news, talking about how I'd left them to head in a different direction. _Liars._Nicole, Emma, and Holly, my mind hissed the last name. _I _couldn't help my parents, but _they_ could - all they had to do was tell the truth. But of course they weren't doing anything but covering their own arses. The anger that flared up in me was like nothing I'd felt before; I was just so angry. I wanted to hurt them. I wanted to make them feel pain. I wanted to kill them. I wanted to get on the next plane to Britain and hunt them all down individually; make them pay.

I'm fairly certain I would have thrown the remote through the Cullens' TV if the news report hadn't moved on again. This time to a shot of my Grandma Kathleen, again pleading for my safe return. All the anger dissolved as I stared at the face of the woman who had always spoilt me – a fact I may have used to my advantage quite a few times in my youth. Who had loved me so much I'm fairly certain she would have given anything for me. I was her first grandchild and her only grandchild until my brother followed me fifteen years later.

What sounded like the soft footsteps of vampires approaching the house distracted me, and I quickly turned the channel over. There was no need for them to know I'd seen it. No need for Carlisle to feel guilty about his decision. No need for them to know I wasn't doing so well adjusting to this new life.

*****

Harry

Just when I thought Amelia and I were making headway, I went and ruined it. Again. I should just have let her look at the pictures of her I'd drawn in my sketchbook.

I hadn't been able to stop thinking about her. Her on the day she woke up. Her victorious a week after we'd arrived home and she'd beat Emmett 10 – 0 on the 'retarded knitted cow game'. Her on the day I had returned from school to find her wearing a pair of Esme's paint overalls. And so I did what I had always done when something was on my mind. I drew it.

But the idea of having to explain those pictures to her was so embarrassing that I had acted how I had.

I had tried in the month since now and then to make it up to her. But her temper just wouldn't go away. I could sense there was anger over something else as well, but I wasn't going to take the life-risking option and ask her what.

But she still played on my mind. Her standing in that sunlight. Her glistening face mere inches from mine. Her ripped dress clinging to her feminine curves. Me being decidedly ungentleman-like in my appreciation of her, before she had looked up at me, and I had forced myself to do the right thing and look away.

"Could you please think about something else?" Jasper's voice cut across my internal dwellings. His nose was wrinkled in disgust.

Of all my new siblings it was Jasper that understood me best. Yes, Edward knew what it was like to try and hunt the evildoers of this world, but he had lived off human blood for mere years. Not decades like Jasper and me - over a century in my case.

"You really need to sort things out between the two of you, " he said, "if only for _my _sake," he added jokingly.

"Your sake?" I questioned back mockingly.

"Do you realise how all over the place your emotions are? And hers for that matter." _Her emotions were all over the place as well? Did that mean she was more then angry?_ I had resorted to trying to use her minor personalities to figure out what was going on, as I would have been able to do with any normal vampire, but had given up. They were just too haywire. _Were her emotions the same?_

"Well, sorry!" I said sarcastically. "Now you know how I feel around her," I joked to him, trying to keep the emotion out of my voice. He shot me a look that reminded me how stupid an effort that was with an empath, for crying out loud. I really was not functioning normally anymore. And it was because of her, even when she wasn't here.

"I doubt I do – especially since I actually do know how you feel around her!" He smirked mischievously at me, reminding me he knew exactly how I was becoming to feel about Amelia. _Damn the impossibility of keeping a secret in the Cullen household_. At least Edward wasn't around to read my thoughts about her as well. That may just take me over my embarrassment threshold. Over a century in which hardly anything could phase me, and now I was acting like a fool over a girl who clearly didn't return my affections.

"Guess what?" a chirpy voice called from the trees. Its pixie-like owner arrived in front of us. "Edward, Rosalie, and Bella are home!" she chimed. _What was I just saying about at least Edward wasn't here? Clearly God was feeling sadistic today._ I felt a brief moment of religious guilt over that thought, not that I had been an actual practising Christian since my days as a human in Victorian England. Religious belief was something that I had lost in the fire of transformation. A century and a half later, even the discovery of a religious vampire hadn't been enough to bring it back into my heart.

"Oh no!" Alice exclaimed as she returned from a vision. She was being protective – I was instantly on edge. "Edward doesn't appreciate Amelia's presence!" A rush of anger flooded me. If he'd hurt her! The anger left me as quickly as it had appeared, replaced with a contented calm. _Jasper. _I turned to look angrily at my brother, but he was too busy paying attention to Alice.

"He hasn't said anything to her. She doesn't even know that they've seen her. They're come to speak to us. Edward is vivid about something in her thoughts, and Rosalie is going to be angry once she finds out what happened. We need to tell the others." Alice disappeared into the forest. Jasper followed her instantly, and I followed a few seconds later, wondering what the repercussions of my hasty request to Carlisle would be now. I was lucky that the rest of the family had intentionally accepted her as one of their own. Would Edward, Rosalie and Bella refuse to do so? I hated the idea that I could be responsible for a rift in the family that had so generously taken me in. But if the other option was to have left her to die … it was an unthinkable thought.

We followed Alice to where the other three were hunting.

"The others are home and they want to speak to us," she announced to them.

"Do they know about Amelia?" Carlisle asked and Alice nodded.

"Edward's heard something in her thoughts that's annoyed him, but I don't know what it is or what he's going to say. He keeps changing his mind."

"How's Rosalie?" Emmett questioned about his wife cautiously.

"She's going to be angry once she finds out," Alice replied.

Then she turned to her husband. "Prepare yourself Jasper, emotions are going to be running high." Jasper grimaced at her words. At times like this, I really didn't envy him his talent. It was bad enough having people's personalities flying around me, at least I didn't actually absorb them.

"Oh, and don't try to calm them down. It just annoys them further in the end," Alice told him.

_What were we going to tell them? How could I explain what had happened?_ I needed to get my thoughts in order before Edward got here. I most definitely needed to not think about her in that ripped dress. I quickly changed my stream of thought, I was right; I most definitely did not need to think about that with Edward around.

"What were you thinking Carlisle?" Edward said with disdain, he didn't bother with any form of greeting as he arrived in front of us with Rosalie and Bella trailing behind.

"Edward, let me explain," Carlisle requested calmly.

"Her parents are looking for her." He grimaced at us then, and I knew that the others' guilty thoughts had joined my own in his head.

"You knew?" he spat at us, looking around at us all in disgust.

"Edward," Bella said calmly, grabbing hold of her husband's arms.

"What's going on?" Rosalie asked annoyed. "First we get home and there's some strange vampire in our house, and then Edward tells us to follow him without any explanation. Who is she? Where'd she come from?"

"Yeah, Carlisle, where'd she come from?" Edward asked sarcastically.

Rosalie was going to hit the roof when she found out Carlisle had changed another dying girl. She's misunderstood is Rosalie; many people only see the vanity and the selfishness. But I can sense there's more to her then that – the loyalty and protectiveness of her family to start with. But her self-loathing over what she had become has been a part of her for so long that it reappears frequently, even though recently she has been trying to let it go. The news that Carlisle had changed another dying girl was sure to bring back all sorts of memories and regrets for Rosalie, and I pitied her for it. I didn't mean for my decision to cause her any more pain when she had already suffered so much. The fact that Amelia was so different, so very human in many ways, was only going to hurt Rosalie more.

While I was thinking about Rosalie, Carlisle was explaining what happened in that Tube Station, except the way he said it made it sound like it had been his decision alone to transform Amelia. As expected, Rosalie flew off the handle. Only I could tell that she did so out of the knowledge of her own self-loathing. In a bizarre way, she was trying to protect Amelia, even if it was from something that had already happened. Protect her from the repercussions of Carlisle's decision. _My decision._

"What do you mean your decision?" Edward turned to me. _Damn mind reader._ Even after three years I still forgot. "You two are omitting something here. What aren't you telling us?"

"I asked Carlisle to change Amelia," I explained. I purposefully thought about that night, about her scent, about her niceness, and how irrational and spontaneous my thoughts had been.

Edward's anger seemed to deflate as he listened to my thoughts.

"Good people die every day, Harry," he argued half-heartedly, but I could tell his spirit wasn't in it anymore. He was looking at Alice; I wondered what she was telling him. _Or was it something in my thoughts that had affected him?_

"I know what it's like to be alone, Harry" he said rather randomly, his arms pulling Bella closer to him as he did. _What? What did my decision that day have to do with being alone?_ I hadn't been thinking about her as a potential mate that day. I had been thinking about how I couldn't let another good person die, not when I'd already seen so many killed, often at my own hands. Then again, the thought of her as my mate…

"Harry!" both Edward and Jasper snapped at me.

_Sorry, _I thought at Edward, purposefully concentrating on feeling apologetic for Jasper's benefit.

"You changed this girl for Harry?" Rosalie asked Carlisle incredulously. "You just don't learning your fucking lesson, do you?" We all gasped then_. Did Rosalie seriously just swear at Carlisle?_ Though Carlisle and Rosalie's relationship was not as close as that of him and his other 'children', she still, perhaps grudgingly, had some respect from him, or so I thought. It would be interesting to see what Sophia made of their relationship. Not that I ever intended for Sophia to met them. It would be too complicated to explain how I came to want a new family to the only surviving member of my old family.

"Rosalie, language!" Esme scolded her daughter, she seemed as lost for words as the rest of us, and appeared to be falling back on what she knew.

I used the long drawn out silence to sample the atmosphere. Carlisle was self-doubting again; clearly Rosalie's words had triggered some old doubts to resurface. Rosalie's protectiveness and defensiveness was over-whelming in her scent. _Is she trying to protect Amelia? But from what exactly? And what is she being so defensive about?_

"Because it turned out sooooooo well last time," Rosalie spat at Carlisle sarcastically. _Last time?_

"Actually it did," Edward pointed out to her. Seven vampires looked at him incredulously. "Last time, when Carlisle turned Emmett for you," he continued, looking pointedly at Rosalie. "This isn't so very different. Harry requested Amelia's change. Just like you requested Emmett's change." He heavily emphasized the word 'requested'.

"Edward, enough!" Carlisle ordered. _Why is he ordering Edward to stop when Edward is defending him, especially since his self-doubt has disappeared at Edward's words?_

Rosalie's defensiveness was at an all time high, Emmett was being protective and Edward was being malicious, that was a new one from him. I couldn't understand the situation, and I don't like being in situations where my intuition can't help me to predict people's response. Right now I had no idea what Rosalie, Edward, Emmett, or Carlisle would say next, and how the others would react, and it put me on edge.

Knowing Rosalie I would have thought that this was related to her hatred of her own transformation, but what did that have to do with transforming people for others? Rosalie wasn't transformed for anyone.

"Well, I'm sure glad she did," Emmett said jokingly, but his face didn't match his tone. He pulled his wife closer and shot Edward a look that clearly said 'shut it'. It was weird seeing his usually joyful face so serious.

"We should be getting back, we don't want to leave Amelia alone for too long," Esme said, in a completely transparent attempt to change topics.

Bella was looking intently at Edward the way she did when she had let her shield down for him to read her thoughts.

"Can I just explain something first?" Edward asked.

"Go ahead," Carlisle said, when no one else replied.

"When we arrived, Amelia turned the news report about her disappearance - yes she knows - over, thinking it was you returning. She didn't want Carlisle and Harry feeling guilty over their decision. Something about that … innocence in her thoughts made me enraged on her behalf, hence my angry reaction."

"It's ok, we all already know you're a melodramatic know-it-all, Edward," Emmett stated and everyone laughed at that. _Trust Emmett to find a way to cut through the tension._

Bella shot her husband a look that suggested that she was mentally scolding him.

"And I'm sorry Rosalie – I didn't mean to be offensive to you," Edward apologised. I'd guessed he'd offended her, but I still couldn't figure out why.

"It's okay, Edward," Rosalie said grudgingly, suggesting it most certainly was not OK.

"Let's all head back now," Esme ordered gently, and with that her, Carlisle, Edward, Bella, Rosalie and Emmett set off towards the house. I was about to follow them when Jasper caught my attention.

"So, want to know what that was all about, Mr. Curiosity?" he asked me mockingly. He knew how frustrated I got when I couldn't figure things out; it was side effect of instantly knowing what sort of person people were. Edward was even worse for it than me.

"Fine, what was that about?" I asked annoyed. Alice smiled impishly at me.

"You didn't think you knew every Cullen family secret did you? It'd been around for 90 years when you joined, you didn't think we'd told you ever part of our past." _Now they're just winding me up. _

"Are you going to tell me why talking about transforming people for others is such a sore spot with Rosalie or not?"

"So you figured that much out at least," Jasper mocked me. "Because Rosalie was transformed for someone," he explained. Alice just smiled mischievously.

"For who?" I asked my curiosity increasing. Alice and Jasper just looked at each other, both wearing identical smirks.

"Edward," they answered together. _Edward?_ I looked at them questioningly. _Rosalie was changed for Edward? Why?_

"Let's just say Carlisle's match-making skills seriously suck," Alice said emphasising the last two words. It all clicked together then. Carlisle had found Rosalie dying and decided to change her for his unmated son. Clearly that didn't turn out well, and nearly eighty years later she was still furious about it. Knowing Rosalie it was not just because of her transformation, but also because of Edward's rejection. And Edward's words had her on the defensive because she had been changed for him, but he hadn't requested it – reminding him of her rejection.

But still … Edward and Rosalie? Mated? That was just an unthinkable idea. I suddenly felt better about not being able to guess at what was going on. _Who would ever have guessed that? How could someone as intelligent as Carlisle have ever have thought that could work out?_ His matchmaking skills really did suck, to use Alice's turn of phrase.

Clearly things did work out a little better when he allowed his children to pick out the person they wanted changing. Rosalie and Emmett – now those too were perfect for each other. Yin and yang, so different and yet perfect combined. _Would it work out as well for me with the person I had, unknowingly at the time, picked?_ Judging by the last month … no. Amelia was being even more standoffish with me than Rosalie was with Edward.

_So that makes it 2-1 down for Carlisle's matchmaking abilities._

"Do I even want to ask what's got you so down all of a sudden?" Jasper asked. I shook my head in response.

"My money's on a certain freaky brunette newborn vampire," Alice said. "And you don't bet against me," she reminded us.

_No Alice, I wouldn't dream of it. As, once again, you're right._

*****

Amelia

I didn't know what was going on. I was sat watching the TV again, I'd changed to some mindless American sit-com, but I wasn't really paying attention. I was certain strange vampires had been here and left. Had it been the missing Cullen family members or different vampires altogether? I shuddered at the thought of other vampires – traditional vampires. Just then I heard the sound of more vampires approaching. Instantly I tensed, then relaxed as I recognised the now familiar scents of Carlisle, Esme, and Emmett, along with the three strangers.

Carlisle and Esme were the first through the door. Two strangers, that I recognised instantly from the descriptions I'd been given, and from Harry's pictures, followed them. Bella and Edward. Then came Emmett, with another stranger I figured was his wife Rosalie.

"Amelia, this is Bella, Edward and Rosalie," Carlisle told me, pointing to each one of them as he said their name.

"Erm…hi," I said shyly, I didn't know what else to say. _What do you say to people when you've pretty much just pushed your way into their family while they were away? And what if they didn't like me? I didn't want to have to leave, but how could I stay if I wasn't liked?_

"It's nice to meet you," Edward said politely. He smiled at me kindly. "And you don't need to worry, no one's going to make you leave." _How had he known what I thinking? Oh wait. He's the mind reader. Just great. What between the psychic, the empath and the intuitive I was already finding it difficult to have any privacy in my own mind and decisions, so let's just add a telepath as well. Just bloody great._

"Did nobody tell you privacy is an impossibility to come by in the Cullen household?" he asked me, his voice much harder then before. _Shit, had he heard all that?_

"Yes," he said coolly.

"Shit, I'm sorry!" I blurted out without thinking, not that it mattered. He'd have heard it whether I thought it through or not. He laughed then. _Great, now I was the court jester as well as the freak show._

"Sorry, it wasn't you. Esme was mentally envisioning washing your mouth out with soap." Humph, I was trying to control my swearing. Old habits are just hard to break, not all of us were born in the 12th century or whatever.

"I ensure you, none of us was born in the 12th century," Edward said, he sounded amused now.

"Edward, get out of the poor girl's head," Bella snapped at him. Then she smiled smugly at him. "I'm shielding you for now, he won't be able to read your mind while I'm shielding, but I can't keep it up for too long." I smiled gratefully at her.

"What was that, Carlisle?" he asked quizzically over my shoulder to his father. I turned to look at Carlisle. He seemed to be concentrating on something. Just then Harry, Alice, and Jasper arrived back.

"Show them your freak thing, Amelia," Alice ordered chirpily. _Of course, let the freak show commence_, I thought as I went to the kitchen and got a glass of water

"Freak thing?" I heard Bella ask.

"That's definitely one way of summing it up," Edward was saying as I returned from the kitchen.

"Well go on then, world's freakiest vampire," Emmett said jokingly, but it sounded forced. I noticed him tighten his grip on his wife. Without further prompting I drank the water. Three vampires stared at me in amazement.

"And you really have no idea why she can do that?" Edward asked Carlisle. I turned to look at him again.

"No," Carlisle replied.

"Rose!" I heard Emmett say behind me. I whipped round to look at them instead. Rosalie shot me a look of pure hatred. _What had I done?_ This is what I had feared. _How could I stay if one of them didn't like me?_

"Don't be so selfish, Rosalie," I heard Edward say to her.

"Get out of my mind, Edward," she hissed at him.

"Rosalie. Edward. Stop it!" Esme ordered.

"Leave her alone, Edward!" Emmett stood between his wife and his brother.

_They were arguing. They were arguing because of me. _I couldn't stay, not if I was going to cause arguments. I wouldn't be the reason a family was divided.

_I have to leave_. The thought filled me with sorrow, even though I had been expecting this day in many ways. After all, it just didn't happen like this right? You don't get pushed down a flight of stairs and taken in by a loving vampire family that easily accepts you. Life isn't that simple, even I wasn't naïve enough to think that.

But where would I go?

"You're not leaving!" Alice and Edward said this at the same time.

"I don't want to cause arguments in this family," I said forcefully. I didn't want to leave, but I would do if I had to.

"Don't be ridiculous – you're not leaving!" Alice was even more forcefully. Hope filled me; they didn't want me to leave.

"Do you actually _want_ to leave?" Carlisle asked me gently.

"No."

"Then it's simple, stay," Esme chimed in. I nodded. Rosalie looked around her at all her family and then stormed upstairs. Emmett looked back at me apologetically and then followed. Edward, Carlisle, and Esme walked off in conversation about the trip to Forks. Harry, Jasper, and Alice disappeared, also in conversation. This left just Bella and me.

"Sorry, I don't know if you noticed, but I couldn't keep my shield up." I shrugged, it wasn't her fault her husband could read minds. Wasn't his fault either, I realised.

"Don't worry about Rosalie. She didn't like me to begin with either. She'll come round eventually," she said kindly. I could see she was trying to make me feel better.

"Thanks." I smiled back at her.

"Hey Bella!" Alice was suddenly back. I noticed Jasper and Harry were now watching the TV. She hugged Bella tightly. "So where's Nessie and the dog?" Alice asked.

"Billy's not got much longer left, and Jacob wanted to stay till the end. However, we accidentally ran into Mike and Jessica Newton and they were a little suspicious, and you know how Jess likes to gossip, so us three had to leave before any more suspicions could come about. I'm not sure we'll be able to return for a while, but maybe Charlie and Sue could visit us here, since we'll no longer have to visit Billy," her voice tailed off sadly. Whoever this Billy was, it was clear she was upset by the thought of him dying. "Anyway, we left Nessie with Sue and Charlie for the week. It seemed too cruel to take her away from Jacob right now." That confused me. _Why would taking their daughter away from the wolf be cruel?_

"And Edward's okay with this?" Alice asked surprised. Bella smiled at that.

"Edward and Jacob have come a long way in the last three years." I could sense a story here, but I wasn't going to ask.

"You have to come see my new purchases for your closet!" Alice chimed excitedly. Bella groaned. Alice had mentioned to me her determination to get Bella to understand the importance of clothing. Watching Bella's reaction, I knew it was a doomed mission.

I left Bella to complain to Alice and flitted over to the TV. The boys were watching some American comedy show. About ten minutes later, Jasper darted off upstairs, leaving just Harry and me. It was uncomfortable to say the least. I had hardly spoken to him since our argument over his sketchbook.

"Would you really have left?" he asked me curiously.

"Yes. I don't want to be the reason for a fight between a family."

"Can I ask you a favor?" he said.

_This should be interesting._

"Sure, go for it." I faked nonchalance.

"Please, don't," was all he said. I looked at him in surprise before nodding my head, unsure of what to say to that. He smiled at me and then turned his attention back to the TV.

_What was that supposed to mean?_

* * *

**A big 'thank you' as always to Project Team Beta. I think I forgot to mention that last chapter, so a big 'thank you' to my two Betas for Chapter 4 as well.**

**Reviews are always appreciated. I understand that this fic is less popular than my other fics; I was expecting that as it has two OCs as the main characters. But for those who are reading this, please let me know what you think. It would make my day :)**


	6. Philosophy

**6. Philosophy**

April 2010

Astoria, Oregon

_Amelia_

You know what's really annoying? People discussing your own death behind your back.

I didn't know what happened in the forest the day that Edward, Bella, and Rosalie returned home. But ever since they had, my death was the hot topic of choice. And I wasn't even invited to participate in the conversation.

_Do they not realise I can hear them for Christ's sake?_

_That's it! _I thought as I heard Edward, Carlisle, Harry, and Rosalie having another one of their whispered discussions upstairs in Carlisle's study. I couldn't catch the words this time, but I knew what was being said. Rosalie thought I should have been left to die, Edward was sitting on the bench, and Carlisle and Harry were defending their decision. _The only person they owed any explanation was me, and I understand their decision. _Perhaps I wasn't particularly happy about what had happened to me at times, such as when I had acted like a blood-crazed animal. But it was better than being left to die.

Angry as I had been at times over the past month, I could never hate them for their decision. Despite the whole hunting incident, overall, I quite liked being a Cullen. They were good people, and I enjoyed being around them, with the exception of Rosalie, who had seemingly taken an instant dislike to me. Plus, I really did seem to fit in with them in a way I had never fit in as a human. Within my family, I had been the girl whose siblings had been fifteen years apart in and with no cousins of her age either, who felt out of place at family gatherings. With my friends, I had often felt disconnected, just like I had for much of the walk home that fateful night. But with the Cullen children, I got along with all of them, Rosalie aside. But I guess it was too much to expect everyone to instantly like me. Then there was Harry. I didn't understand what was going on between us, but somehow it felt right being around him, though I couldn't put my finger on why.

"Excuse me," I said to Bella and Esme, slamming the book I had been pretending to read shut. They both looked over at me from over the tops of their own book. "This," I pointed my head upwards, "has to end!"

"Appears Amelia has something to say," I heard Edward say. _Yes, I have something to say, mind reader. How has it taken you so long to pick that up?_

All four of them came downstairs to where I sat with Bella and Esme. Jasper and Emmett looked up from the corner, where they were playing the most complicated game of chess I'd ever seen; I had been watching them earlier, but an hour in and with no end in sight, I'd given up out of boredom and confusion. Alice, who was working on some clothing design program on the computer, twirled round in the computer chair to face me.

_Just great, looks like the 'Amelia's philosophy of life' lesson would have a full audience. Actually, let them all listen. At least this way they'll all know I wasn't angry and stop trying to make Carlisle and Harry feel guilty._

"You know what I believe?" I began. "I always believed everything in life happens for a reason. That even the bad stuff that happens to you in life has a point to it. So maybe I was supposed to become a vampire – maybe that's why I was pushed down a flight of stairs. All I know is, it has happened, and there's a reason behind it, and I'm not mad.

"So can you please stop with the 'should we have changed Amelia' conversations? To start with, it's really rude that you're having them with me in the house. There's talking behind someone's back, and then there's doing it blatantly in front of them.

Not once have any of you asked my opinion, now have you? Well, here it is anyway. I'm not mad at Carlisle and Harry for their decision.

"If you what to be angry with someone on my behalf, hop on a transatlantic flight and go hunt down my so-called former friends. There were two decisions made that night. One I understand, the other I don't. I think you can figure out which is which. So, no more conversations about my death, okay?

"It's happened and I'd like to think it happened for a reason. Maybe I was always meant to become a part of this family, and that's why I was pushed down a flight of stairs. Maybe fate or destiny, or whatever, planned this."

"Or God?" Carlisle interjected.

"Or God, I suppose, though I'm technically agnostic," I replied.

"How can you be agnostic and believe that everything happens for a reason?" Edward asked, curiously. _Good question._

"I like to think everything happens for a reason – I don't claim to know why. If it is God, then prove it. Maybe it is, maybe it isn't. It's just comforting to think that even the lowest moments in your life have a reason behind them, you know?"

The entire family lapsed into silence, clearly thinking about my words. I'd never voiced my own approach to religion, destiny, and life before. I was just glad they didn't find it stupid.

Even Rosalie seemed absorbed in what I was saying. She was looking at me with curiosity, instead of disgust and hatred. I didn't know what her problem was, but maybe my little speech could help to solve things.

"So, anyway, no more 'should we have left Amelia to die' convos, please," I repeated. They all nodded their agreement. I smiled, pleased. Not only had I gotten them to shut up, but I'd given them something to think about as well.

* * *

**A big 'thank you' as always to Project Team Beta.**

**Short chapter, but Amelia needed a chance to explain that she isn't mad.**


	7. Rescued When I Thought I Couldn't Be

**7. Rescued When I Thought I Couldn't Be**

April 2010

Astoria, Oregon

_Harry_

11th April 2010: It was three years to the day since I got my second chance at life, therefore, I found myself thinking about the decisions and actions that led me to where I am today.

Amelia's words six days ago had got us all thinking. _"Everything happens for a reason." Is there a reason for the all the terrible events in the pasts of my family and me?_

When you thought about it - it did make sense. Of all the places Esme could have run away to, she chose Ashland, and even though she lost her baby, she gained Carlisle and her adopted children. Bella chose to move to Forks, despite the fact she despised it, and because of that decision she met Edward. Carlisle has saved thousands of lives – surely that's the reason he was turned in a vampire. A bear attacked Emmett and Rosalie was assaulted, but if those things hadn't happened they would never have found each other.

When Sophia and me fled England, we went west instead of east. It was a seemingly random decision at the time, had we gone east instead, my life would have been turned out very differently.

I looked at the pictures I had drawn and placed on my wall.

Sophia and Me.

The Irish coven.

Sophia and John.

The young, too nice to live, Italian girl.

Me, Carlisle, and Siobhan in my cave.

I looked at some of the puzzle pieces of my life and reflected on how they all fit together.

_1888_

_The Irish Sea_

_The sea was dark and silent. It was night-time so there was no way anyone could see us as we swim at full speed. Sophia swam just ahead of me._

_We were fleeing, from England, from our coven that was responsible for the death of our family four decades ago. I had never liked them, not from the very beginning. I had never wanted to stay with them. They were bad people. From the very start, even when I didn't understand how my talent worked, I had known they were bad people._

_I was glad to leave. Glad to get my sister from their clutches. She claimed the vampires of our former coven were respected, and because of that we should stay with them. Just as I could tell what people's personalities were, my sister seemed able to tell who was respected and who wasn't. It was the day she realised they didn't respect her that the trouble started. If I hadn't got back in time to fight alongside her, then she would be gone by now._

_I watched Sophia as she swam ahead of me. After everything she'd done it was surprising to others that I still stood up for her. But I always would. She was my twin sister, and despite it all, we would stick together through thick and thin, just as we had promised each other as kids growing up together. She was my sister and I would protect her, as a brother should._

_Also, I knew my sister was not a good person despite what she had done to me. Naïve, yes. But also friendly and loving. I had begun to recognise the different components of her scent for what they were. _

_I don't know why we had fled west instead of east. It seemed a stupid decision all things considered. To the east you had the whole Europe, while to the west all you had was Ireland, and then the Atlantic Ocean stretching out the long distance between us and America. What could we possibly find of interest in Ireland, the land of potato loving peasants? Oh well, anywhere was better than England right now._

_1902_

_The English Channel_

_I was fleeing again. In fact, the situation was eerily similar to fourteen years ago. There was just one major difference – I had left my sister behind this time. There was nothing more I could do to protect her, and after everything she's done to me, why should I even bother anymore? Why did I ever bother? If she wants a mate that's malicious, deceitful and selfish that's her choice. I don't care how respected he is. Surely she should have learned by now how to tell the difference between the different types of respect. She's been living in a world where she can sense who respects who for over fifty years now, so surely she can tell the difference. But if she can, then why would she stay with a man who is only respected out of fear and hatred?_

_I had tried. We returned from Ireland after staying with the coven there for a year. And shortly after our arrival we ran into John and his coven. John, my thoughts sneered his name. I had tried to get her to leave. But my naïve sister hadn't believed me. Still I tried. For thirteen years, I tried. I had vowed I would always protect my sister, and it was that which kept me there for all those years._

_But I would try no longer. I had already wasted fifty-four years of immortality looking after my sister. I couldn't do it any more. She had made her decision, and I had made mine. And last time I had tried to speak to her about it, she had had made it very clear that she would be perfectly fine without me. She didn't need me to protect her anymore. So I took her words to heart and left. If she didn't want my protection, then I was going to stop trying to protect her from her own stupidity and naivety. _

_And why, after everything she's done to me, should I try any longer? After everything she's done, she's lucky I tried in the first place!_

_1997_

_Volterra, Italy _

"_Why so distraught, my young friend?" Aro asked me in his usually chirpy tones. "So, you killed a human. It's hardly a new occurrence. Certainly no reason for such self-disgust."_

"_You know why," I spat back at him. His joyful manner was infuriating to me as I wallowed in self-hatred._

"_You know I never understood your position on that. Killing only bad people. Forcing yourself to kill those that don't smell as appetising to you. Why do that when you, with your unique take on the world, could enjoy such a banquet?"_

'_My unique take on the world', well that was certainly one-way of putting it._

_I had been in Volterra for the past few years. I had accidentally come to close to the city, as I had never been warned about the Volturi. That was usually a creator's job, but I was hardly created in usual circumstances. Aro kept me around, not because my talent was particularly useful to the guard, but because I was something of an oddity to him. Vampire talents don't usually affect your sense of smell, and the way I chose to live my, well not life, but existence, intrigued him._

"_By killing good people?" I said sarcastically._

"_Good people. Bad people. They're all people. Just silly humans going around their mundane lives."_

"_Lives we take away from them. While I don't mind taking away the lives of those I can tell do not make the most of them, I do not want to be a murderer of those who try to. Those who deserve the chance to live."_

"_What humans do with their lives is of no matter to us. This girl you killed – is her death really going to make any difference to you?"_

_I thought of the poor unfortunate girl. I hadn't noticed her until her scent hit me. The nicest I'd ever smelled. It called to me and I followed its call without thinking. I didn't even get a proper look at her until she was already dead. She was young, no older then seven. She had long black wavy hair and brown dead eyes. Eyes, that a minute ago, would have been filled with life. Until I found her. I wanted to run there and then. Run away from what I was and what I'd become._

_She was an innocent, sweet little girl. She would have grown up to be a good person too, and in a human world full of liars, cheats, and criminals, that was a rarity._

_And I'd killed her._

_As much as I wanted to, I couldn't just run away and leave her there. Even though I didn't want to look at her corpse, a shameful reminder of what I was, for one second longer, I knew I couldn't just leave her. Dispose evidence, it was a fundamental rule. And so I did just that, all the time with a crushing pain where my dead, still, heart was._

_I thought I could be something different. I thought I could be of use to society, to kill only those that wouldn't, well shouldn't anyway, be missed. I had thought I could fight my temptation to kill those who smelled nicer. Those who were nicer. I was wrong__**.**__ I was exactly what I should be – a menace to human society._

"_Yes it is!" I answered Aro's question passionately. Yes it would. I would make sure my life, my very existence, would never damage the lives of those who deserved a chance at life._

_April 2007_

_Rural Russia_

_I didn't know how long it had been. The burn in my throat was omni-present; it had been ten years since I had last satisfied my need to cool it. I was too weak to do so now anyway. I couldn't move, locked in my own stone body, trapped by the lack of energy. But I couldn't die. I would spend the rest of eternity frozen like the stone I was in this cave. So far away from the human populace they'd never tempt me again. This barren part of the wilderness of rural Russia was so deserted that not even any animals lived nearby. Or maybe that was just since I had taken up residency._

_I would never move again. I would never kill again. As always, my thoughts returned to my last kill. The sweet, young, Italian girl. It had been her death that had shown me I was weaker than I thought. That showed me that unless I got myself away from humans, good people would always die because of me._

_For the first time in a long time I sensed something nearby. One of my own kind. Influential, determined and strong-minded, it was a scent I recognised._

_"__Hello, old friend," I heard Siobhan say softly. What was she doing here? I hadn't seen her since Sophia and I had left Ireland in 1889._

"_I had a run in with your sister. She said she'd been to Volterra, and they said you were starving yourself in a cave in Russia somewhere. So, she returned to England deciding not to intervene. Which I thought was a little harsh after everything you did for her. After you forgave her for what happened the night your family died. After you stood by her side and fought to save her as she made stupid decision after stupid decision." _

_There was a pause. I tried to look quizzically at her, but I didn't have the energy to do so. What did my siblings problems have to do with her? It was all part of a long distant past anyway. I wasn't Harry Leone anymore. I was just a starved stone statue in a cave, one that wished to be left alone to suffer for all eternity. Why was she here invading my self-destruction? To help? I was beyond help._

"_Well, anyway, I decided I had to see you for myself. I owe you, and her I suppose, a favor anyway don't I?" she answered my unspoken question. _

_I wanted to tell her to leave. That favor or not, there was nothing she could do to help me, but I couldn't speak. My mouth hadn't done so in so long. It was like I'd forgotten how too._

"_Leave … me…be!" I managed to get out._

"_Now that's just rude, Mr. Henry." If I'd been able to, I would have rolled my eyes at her use of my proper name. Nobody called me 'Henry' nowadays, not since the day my mother died along with the rest of my human family that wasn't now immortal. It had always been 'Harry,' ever since the day when I was six years old and Sophia, and our elder sisters (I can't even remember their names now due to the blurriness of my human memories), had first called me it._

"_I … don't … want … to … kill." I would have continued but I didn't have the strength to continue my argument._

"_Well, luckily for you I have a friend who can help you. He owes me a rather large favor."_

"_I … don't … want…" I started to argue but she cut me off._

"_You can't live like this for the rest of eternity. Let me get in contact with my friend, and we'll be back in a few days for you," she said forcefully._

"_Don't … bother!" I ordered. I didn't want help. I wanted to be left alone in my misery._

"_You won't have to kill humans again, don't worry." Even in my stupor this caught my attention._

"_How?" I asked. She smiled knowingly at the curiosity in my voice._

"_I'll leave it to my friend to explain. This will work, Harry. Trust me, I'm willing it to." She smiled then. I remembered the jokes there were about her 'power'. Did she finally believe?_

"_Two days, Harry, and you'll be starting a whole new life, see you then." Then she disappeared, leaving me to wonder if she'd been a hallucination. Could vampires go mad? If it was possible, I shouldn't be surprised if I had. I'd been starving myself in a cave by myself for ten years. What vampire wouldn't go mad in that situation if it were possible? I almost rejoiced in my madness. What did my sanity matter right now? I was never going to leave this cave._

_My hallucination was returning. It was a very realistic hallucination. But she wasn't alone this time. There was another scent on the horizon. Over-riding compassion. Not anyone I'd ever met. Who was this? The friend Siobhan had mentioned? Could they really help me? Judging by there scent they most certainly would want to. In an under-world full of greed, bloodlust and self-indulgence, compassion was an unusual trait to find among my kind, especially to have it so over-powering, to have it as the only trait. Who was this compassionate stranger?_

_I heard them talking in the distance, but couldn't catch the words. Then I heard the quiet footsteps of the stranger disappearing, as the smell of compassion disappeared alongside it._

_"Hello again, Harry," Siobhan said kindly, sitting down beside me. "My friend, Carlisle, went to get you a meal." A meal? I didn't want a meal!_

_"I … don't…"_

_"You don't want to kill humans, I know." I couldn't help but notice the way she emphasised the word humans. She said it like there was another choice. But I couldn't get my hopes up at that thought. There was no other choice! I was what I was!_

_Suddenly I smelt something I hadn't smelt in over a decade. The siren call of fresh blood. It didn't smell the same as I remembered though; there was a bitter tang to it somehow. I didn't care. My instincts overtook me, and using every amount of energy I had left, I moved for the first time in a decade. They were sluggish movements, probably slower than even a human. But I moved without thinking; it was pure instinct. I felt my mouth bite down on something, and I began to drink the delightful elixir I hadn't touched in a decade, though it tasted slightly bitter compared to what I remembered. Only when every last drop of the tempting liquid was down my throat did I stop to consider where it was coming from. I tried to force myself to look down, expecting to see a blood-drained human corpse as always, but I couldn't do it. I was a monster again and I didn't want to see the evidence._

_I began wondering what kind of person they'd be. Suddenly I realised that I didn't know the answer to that question. I hadn't got any sense of their personality before I'd killed them. Had they really found a solution to my problem? Sheer curiosity caused my eyes to flick down to the blood-drained corpse I knew lay at my feet. It was a deer. Understanding flared in me. You could drink the blood of animals. Animals didn't have personalities. I had found a solution. Why hadn't I thought of this? Why didn't anyone tell me about this? I could leave this cave! I didn't have to starve myself anymore!_

"_So, what'd you think?" Siobhan asked chirpily._

"_You've found a solution," I replied in awe._

"_I __didn't!" she replied. I turned my attention to her compassionate companion._

"_Harry, this is Dr. Carlisle Cullen." I offered him my hand and he shook it._

"_Nice to meet you, sir." Even a century and a half later, I hadn't forgotten the manners my mama drilled into me. I took a closer look at him. He must have been about early to mid-twenties when he was changed, I guessed. But there was one thing about his appearance that caught my attention._

"_What's wrong with your eyes?" I asked curiously. I couldn't help myself. Dr. Cullen smiled at me._

"_It's a side-effect of living off of animal blood. Yours will go like this too if you stick to this diet."_

"_Are they like that already?"_

"_They're still too black to tell," Siobhan informed me._

"_Maybe you should hunt some more," Dr. Cullen said kindly. I hadn't even been thinking about the burn in my throat. I had been ignoring it for so long to pay it much attention._

_I briefly wondered if Dr. Cullen was another hallucination. It wasn't possible that after ten years, someone would bother to even try to save me, never mind have the perfect solution._

"_I'm hallucinating, aren't I?" I asked casually. There was no need to be embarrassed around them. After all, they were just by-products of my starved mind._

"_I ensure you, you're not," Dr. Cullen said gently_

"_Let's go hunt then, sir," I said. I may as well play along with the madness._

"_Call me, Carlisle," he said and then continued, "follow me. I found that deer about twenty miles away. The herd shouldn't have gone to far."_

_I followed him, this hallucination of an angel who had rescued me from the depths of darkest despair. He couldn't be real, but I had nothing better to do then go along with the madness in my mind._

_Can vampires go mad? The answer: it appeared was a definite yes. _

April 2010

Astoria, Oregon

Of course I'd finally accepted they weren't hallucinations after that first animal hunt. I had been offered a choice. I could either have gone with Carlisle and meet the Cullens, gone to Denali, or gone my own way. After ten years of isolation, I had no intention of choosing more solitude. I didn't like the idea of going unannounced to some unknown coven either. In the end I chose to go with Carlisle, for lack of any better options.

It wasn't until we were on the Cullen's private plane on the way to America that he mentioned the word 'family'. I had bristled at the word. I didn't need another family. I decided I would stay with them a short while, learn the basics of the animal-feeder lifestyle, and then leave him and his 'family' in peace. Obviously that didn't turn out as I had planned.

I looked at the pictures on my wall, detailing my life. As resistant as I had been to the idea of a new family at first, slowly I find myself enjoying family life.

The idea of parents was amusing to me at first; I hadn't had them in over a century. I was older than Esme, for crying out loud. But resisting the gentle love Esme so willingly offered to everyone who crosses her path is impossible, especially coupled with the gentle compassionate patience of her husband.

My attitude towards siblings was different however, due to my past experience with my twin sister. If I had learned one thing in the past hundred and fifty years it was that siblings were more trouble than they were worth. However, I had never had brothers before. Surrounded by sisters as a human and my one remaining sister as an immortal, I found the companionship of Jasper, Edward, and Emmett new, but enjoyable. I was, of course, more resistant to the idea of sisters. Sisters had brought me nothing but trouble and death. But hating Alice and Bella was a near impossibility, and I even found Rosalie if not likeable, then misunderstood.

It had been six months into my stay with the Cullens, shortly after my talk with Esme where I had broken down and called her 'mum' by accident, that Alice and Edward had happily informed me I'd decided to stay with them. And I couldn't disagree. I no longer felt the desire to leave.

"_Everything in life happens for a reason."_

The words echoed in my head again. Yes, we most definitely went west and not east for a reason. For if we had never gone to Ireland, we'd have never met the Irish coven. If I'd never met Siobhan, then she'd have never shown any interest in my decision to starve to death, and if she didn't come to Russia to save me, then neither did Carlisle, and I would probably still be half-dead in a cave.

The jigsaw pieces of my life all fitted together to bring me to here. To the Cullens. To my family. But was there still a piece missing?

"_Everything in life happens for a reason." _Amelia's voice taunted me as I considered what the missing piece could be.

* * *

**A big 'thank you' to Project Team Beta as always.**

**Any thoughts on Harry's past? Reviews are always welcome.**


	8. Smells Delicious

**8. Smells Delicious**

April 2010

Astoria, Oregon

_Amelia_

The kitchen was filled with the aromatic smells of cooking. Esme, Bella and, me were preparing for the arrival of Renesmee, Jacob, and a friend of Jacob's named Seth. A giant pizza was cooking in the oven. Esme was filling the fridge; for once her shopping wasn't heading towards a homeless shelter. Bella was preparing a large chocolate cake.

"God, I used to love chocolate," I said to Bella from where I was perched on the countertop. I had been helping Esme make the pizza earlier, but now found myself without a task to do, so I just sat and watched as they worked.

"I was never that bothered with it," Bella replied.

"How can you not be bothered about chocolate?" I asked incredulously. "Shame I can never eat it again. It still smells nice though. And that pizza… God, I used to love pizza!" Both Esme and Bella turned to look at me in shock. _Great, what freak thing have I done now?_

"It smells nice?" they both asked surprised.

"Take it that's not normal?"

They both shook their heads.

"I wonder if I could still eat it. What with the whole freak thing going on?" I jumped off the countertop, landing a little too heavily on the floor; I pretended not to notice Esme wince. I placed my finger in the icing Bella had just poured onto the cake, ignoring her grumble, and shoved it in my mouth. It tasted divine. Not as nice as the blood unfortunately, but still heavenly.

"Mmm, that's good, Bella," I complimented her, and then I grabbed a plate and cut myself a giant slice. I ate it all in under five seconds.

Suddenly, my stomach felt funny. Without warning, I felt my body repel the food I had just consumed, and I moved to the sink as fast as I could. Gentle hands held my hair back as I was violently sick.

"Okay," I began, wiping my mouth, "so, human food smells and tastes nice, but a definite no go," I summarised. "Thanks Esme," I said, realising it was her who was holding my hair back. She let it fall again.

I began cleaning up the mess in the sink. It appeared to be a mixture of chocolate cake, Coke, and blood.

"You okay?" Esme asked gently.

"Fine," I replied, though I was secretly upset that I couldn't stomach the food. The fact that it smelled nice had made me optimistic. Esme and Bella shared a loaded look but didn't say anything, and went back to doing what they were doing beforehand. I hopped back onto the countertop carefully; Esme had made it very clear earlier that she wouldn't appreciate a dented countertop.

"I thought only three people were coming?" I wondered out loud, hoping to move the conversation on. I looked dubiously at the mountain of food Esme was currently placing beside me on the countertop.

"Yes, that's right," Esme replied.

"I know you all haven't eaten in centuries or whatever, but this is _waaaaaaaaaay_ too much food for three people, especially since you said your granddaughter doesn't even like eating food."

"When you see how much the wolves eat you'll understand. Those two could literally eat a horse each and still be hungry," Bella informed me with a laugh. She had given up on the chocolate cake, since I had somewhat ruined it by taking a huge slice out, and was now checking the pizza.

"So, 'I'm so hungry I could eat a horse' isn't an exaggeration for them?"

"Nope!" Bella chuckled.

"That'd be a sight to see," I mumbled to myself. Esme and Bella heard me of course, and both of them laughed.

"Considering the wolves are as big as horses themselves, it certainly would," Bella said with a smile.

"Do you think they'd appreciate it if I changed the saying to 'I'm so hungry I could eat a wolf'?" I asked jokingly. Bella and Esme burst out laughing again; both of them were laughing too much to continue with their tasks. They were joined by a booming laugh from the living room.

"I am _so_ saying that to Jacob when he gets here!" Emmett called from the other room.

"Please don't!" I replied panicked. I didn't need anymore of my new family members disliking me. Well, Jacob wasn't a family member anyway. _Actually, what is he?_ Carlisle had said he was a "friend" of Bella and Renesmee, but the way he'd said it suggested there was more to it than that.

"Amelia, can we speak with you for a moment?" Carlisle asked as he walked into the kitchen. I jumped off the countertop, carefully again, and followed him into his study. Edward, Harry, and Jasper were all standing there, watching me carefully.

"What's up?" I asked, trying to sound nonchalant, though the looks on their faces had me worried. _What now?_

"Amelia, do you remember what I told you about Renesmee?" Carlisle asked me.

"She's Edward and Bella's half-human daughter," I replied. "How do you have a half-human daughter anyway?" I asked Edward.

"I'll explain later," he replied, before looking at Carlisle, who took that as his cue to start talking again.

"Because Renesmee is half-human, she has a heartbeat and human blood. Do you understand what that means?" I shook my head, feeling like I was being slow on the uptake.

"There's a chance the human blood might appeal to you." Realisation hit me like a freight train as I took in the meaning behind his words. _I would want to kill her._

"I'll want to kill her?" I managed to stutter the words out, looking at the vampires in front of me in complete shock.

"It's unknown what your reaction would be, given that you're different to the-" Carlisle began to say, but my hysterics cut over him.

"But there's a chance I'll want to kill her? What about the other two? Will I want to kill them too? And you're only just mentioning this to me?" My hysterics suddenly stopped, as I was flooded with calm. After all, there was no need to get so worked up about it. I glared over at Jasper, but stopped when I noticed the pained look on his face. The effort of calming my hysterics was clearly hurting him.

I looked over at Edward. _What would he do if his daughter died? Because of me?_ Despite Jasper's best efforts, I felt the hysterics building up. _They can't take this risk because of me! They shouldn't have to!_

"Oh no, Amelia, don't start that again!" Alice was suddenly in the doorway, glaring at me. "For the last time, you're not leaving. Nobody wants you to. You're stuck with us." She smiled impishly at the last line.

I looked nervously over at Edward. "But what if I kill your daughter?" I managed to whimper.

"None of us would ever let you hurt her. Nobody wants to see either of you get hurt," he reassured me.

"And the other two?"

"Smell like wet dog, so no worries there!" Emmett answered my question from downstairs.

"You will have to get used to being around humans eventually, Amelia," Carlisle said gently.

"Right, I can do it!" I said, trying to sound more confident than I felt. Edward, Jasper, and Harry each looked at me in a not so subtle reminder that my thoughts, feelings, and personality traits weren't exactly hidden anymore.

"When do they get here?" I purposefully looked at Alice. She scrunched her face up at me; it looked like she was in pain.

"I don't know," she admitted, defeated.

"Alice, darlin', you have to stop trying to see the wolves and Nessie's future," Jasper said to her as he went up to her and wrapped his arm around her, leading her out of the room.

"Alice can't 'see' the wolves or Nessie," Edward explained.

"Why not?" I asked.

He shrugged. "We don't know. Can I speak to Amelia alone for a minute?" he asked. Carlisle looked surprised but left, which seemed kind of weird considering it was his office. Harry looked uncertain about whether to follow him or not.

"Fine, stay if you must," Edward said to him. Before I could begin to wonder about Harry's strange reaction, Edward turned his attention back to me.

"Can I ask you a favor?"

"Sure. Why, what it is? To not kill your daughter?"

"Well, yes. And to hunt, please," he replied. _His plan to stop me from acting like a vampire is to … force me to act like a vampire?_

"It'll be better if you're not thirsty," he explained.

"Fine, I'll go and get a cup of tea then," I replied snappily.

He dropped his voice before answering again, "Despite the lies you tell Carlisle, human drinks do not satisfy your thirst properly, and we both know it." He had me there. _Damn mind reader._

"For my daughter's safety, please," he asked of me, pleading. _Fine! If it means I'm less likely to attempt to kill someone, then fine!_

"I'll go with you again," Harry said quickly. "If you'd like," he added. I nodded, despite what had happened last time, I still liked the idea that it would be him who would be with me. I couldn't figure out why I felt that way, but I did.

The hunt wasn't as bad as last time. It still felt peculiar to "give myself over to my vampire side," but it was in no way as horrifying has it had been first time round. Maybe it was simply because I had known what to expect this time. At least there was no weirdness between Harry and me this time around.

The entire Cullen family was sitting in the front room_. It looks like it has been in a war with a glitter factory and lost, epically._ A huge silver banner said, "Welcome home." The room was covered in glittering decorations of every sort and colour, helium balloons were placed at strategic points in the house, and every surface was wrapped in sparkly tinsel or shiny paper. In most circumstances, it would have looked overdone and tacky, however it actually looked rather stunning.

"Wow, you shouldn't have!" Harry said sarcastically from behind me, the others laughed at him.

"Wow, it looks amazing. How'd you do it so fast?" I asked, completely mesmerised by the glittering decorations.

"Vampires, remember?" Emmett replied jokingly.

"You did this, Emmett?" I asked unbelievingly. Everyone laughed. _That would be a no then. _

"As if," Alice scoffed. "I did it, of course." That made much more sense.

"Well, you did a brilliant job."

"Finally, someone who appreciates the importance of good decorations." Alice glared at Bella.

"I still think this is completely unnecessary," Bella huffed.

"Oh, stop complaining. It's not even for you anyway. It's for Nessie. What little girl doesn't love glitter?" Alice shot back.

"Hell, I'm eighteen and I'm still attracted to anything that glitters. My mum used to call me her little magpie," I chimed in, and was suddenly hit by an onslaught of blurry memories_. I wonder if they are still looking for me? Surely they will be, they won't give up after only two months_.

"Amelia?" I heard my name echoing from several different voices.

"Don't worry. I'm fine," I lied, struggling to hold back tears. Trust me to be the only vampire who could cry. I closed my eyes and placed my head in my hands, wiping my eyes.

"Amelia, if you want to speak to us about your parents, it's okay," I heard the gentle voice of Esme say.

"Well, I don't particularly," I replied snappishly. It wasn't until after I'd said it that I realised how impolite it sounded; Esme didn't deserve to be spoken to like that. I pulled my hands away and opened my eyes again. The concerned faces of the members of the Cullen family looked back at me. How could I explain how much I missed my human family? About the guilt I felt as my memories slipped away, and I got more and more involved in my new life, and thought about them less and less?

"I'm sure Renesmee will love the decorations," I said to Alice. I knew it wasn't subtle and I didn't care. Turning to Bella and Edward, I recalled my earlier question – it would do as a suitable distraction.

"So how do you two have a half-human daughter anyway?" I asked, and then I decided to ask about the other thing that had been bugging me. "And who the hell's this Jacob guy?"

"Bella conceived Nessie when she was still human, and Jacob is an old _friend_ of Bella's who imprinted on Nessie after birth," Edward explained.

_She conceived a half-vampire child while still human? That means she had sex with Edward while he was a vampire and she was still human. What the fuck? Why would she do that? And there they go with the whole 'friend' bit again. And what the hell is imprinting?_

"Yes, we had sex while Bella was still human. And imprinting is an uncontrollable force in which a werewolf finds their soul mate," Edward answered the questions in my thoughts.

_Soul mate? The werewolf is in love with their child? That is just sick. How can they appear so calm about it_?

"It's not what it sounds like," Edward began, but I interrupted him.

"You mean your _friend_," I used the word sarcastically, (whoever this Jacob guy was, he was clearly more then just some old friend), "isn't a massive paedo?" Emmett, Jasper, Alice, and Harry all laughed at that. But none of them laughed quite as hard as Rosalie. It looked like my comment hadn't just made her day, but her decade. Carlisle and Esme glared at Rosalie, and she sobered herself up, but was still smirking. Bella and Edward seemed completely nonchalant about the entire thing. _Just like you do when some paedo wolf claims your half-human daughter is his soul mate. _

"Jacob isn't in love with her per se at the moment; he's currently just her friend. But when she's older …" Edward's explanation trailed off, and a look of anger flickered across his face. Bella shifted uncomfortably in her seat, a completely unneeded human habit. Finally, they seemed bothered by the whole sick and twisted idea. _Then again, they can't say much. The raving vampire pervert who impregnated a human and the necrophiliac._ Edward sighed then. _Shit! Damn mind reader just heard all that didn't he?_ As much as I knew that the whole mind reading thing wasn't Edward's fault, it still crept me out slightly to not even have privacy in my own mind, especially with stray thoughts like that one floating around in there.

"We're going to have to tell you the full story, aren't we?" he asked wearily.

"Well, the short version kind of makes you look like some sort of vampire pervert, your wife look like a necrophiliac, and Jacob look like a paedophile, so yes." All of his siblings joined in laughing at me again then; even his parents couldn't quite suppress their amusement at my assessment.

"Amelia, we have to ask you not to mention any of this to Renesmee," Bella stated. _God, how bad could it be?_

"Fine, of course, if you don't want her to know that's up to you," I said as I moved to sit down on the chair opposite them. I heard Harry move behind me. He sat on the arm of the chair next to me. The rest of the family however drifted off; clearly they already knew what I was about to be told. Then Bella and Edward told me their story.

Half an hour - and one incredibly fucked-up story - later, I was looking at them in shock, still trying to get my head around everything they'd told me.

I proceeded to summarise everything they'd just said up to the part I really didn't get – Renesmee and Jacob. Falling in love with a vampire, false-informed suicide attempts, and fighting psycho vampire bitches I could just about get my head round. But I was still confused about the part that happened after Bella got pregnant.

"So, is this all right so far?" I asked as I finished my summary.

"Unfortunately yes," Edward replied, while Bella nodded.

"So vampire father tries to get knocked-up human to have an abortion, knocked-up human refuses and gets support from vampire family member who … knows what it's like to be unable to have children." I had wanted to say 'who wishes to steal the child because they can't have any', but Rosalie was the only Cullen I was particularly worried about pissing off. She didn't like me enough as it was. However, I knew Edward heard me, and by the look on his face, I think he agreed. "Rejected wolf decides to help protect the child to protect Bella. She has a really difficult pregnancy and then goes into early labour by dropping a cup of blood." I looked at Bella; it was hard to imagine the incredibly graceful vampire as the clumsy human she'd been described as.

"Then, and this is where things getting really fucked-up-"

"Amelia, language," Esme scolded from the kitchen.

"Sorry, Esme, really _messed-up_. Edward has to bite into Bella's womb to get the baby out so it doesn't chew its way out on it's own." I paused then, still trying to get my head around it. Both Edward and Bella just calmly watched me. It was kind of infuriating. _How could they be so calm about all this?_

"Why are you both looking at me like that is perfectly normal?" When neither answered I continued, "Jacob thinks Bella's dead and goes to kill the baby, but then he imprints on her, which means she is his soul mate, but it won't be romantic until she grows up. And we think the reason he thought he was in love with Bella was because he knew all along that she would produce his soul mate?"

"Yes," Bella answered calmly, like she was agreeing to something completely normal.

"And then some shit, sorry Esme, happens with the before mentioned up their own arse royal vampires that I'm not even going to try and understand." _I'll just stick to trying to process their 'love story' first._

"Pretty much, yeah. It was certainly an interesting couple of years," Bella said.

"Interesting," I scoffed, "that's one way of putting it. I can see why you don't want your daughter to know. That day will be interesting."

"What day?" Edward and Bella both asked.

"The day when she's grown up and you have to explain all that shit-"

"Amelia!" Esme again.

"Sorry, Esme," I said exasperatedly. _So I swear a little, what 21__st__ century teenager doesn't?_ "Anyway, the day you have to explain all that to her."

"They'll be here in a minute," Alice called. "I think," she added sadly.

_Right, time to not kill anybody._ I still couldn't quite comprehend the idea of me actually killing anyone. But I would think about my two hunting trips, and how the animal blood had called to me, and how human blood was supposedly so much more potent. Then I could see how it could be possible for it to happen.

"Do you mind if I have drink first?" I asked. I always felt more human when I drank.

"That might be for the best," Edward replied. I flitted off to the kitchen and grabbed a bottle of Coke. I downed it all in five seconds without thinking. So much for being human. But it still had the same humanising feel to it. Like it washed away the vampire in me, the one who seemed to become more alive straight after a hunt.

I flitted back into the living room just as the sound of an approaching car became clear.

"Edward, Bella, and I are going to go speak to Jacob and Seth," Carlisle began.

"Leah's with them too," Edward cut in.

_Who's Leah?_ A look of surprise crossed Carlisle's face.

"I thought she never-" Carlisle began again, but was again cut off by Edward.

"She doesn't, but Jacob wanted extra protection, and with Quil and Embry both having imprints in La Push, she was the only available member of his pack."

"Well, then the three of us will go outside to meet all four of them. The rest of you watch Amelia." Everyone in the room nodded their agreement.

The three vampires darted out the door as the car came to a stop. The remaining vampires all surrounded me in some obviously earlier planned formation. Emmett and Rosalie stood between me and the door. Jasper and Harry flanked my sides, while Esme and Alice stood behind me. There bodies were tense, not moving. It took me a second to realise I was doing the same – vampire stillness.

I could hear the sound of four heartbeats, one was much quicker then the other.

"Mommy. Daddy!" I heard a girl's voice shout.

"Hello there, princess," I heard Edward say lovingly.

"Hello, darling," Bella called. Then there was a sound that sounded like someone being kissed on the forehead, followed by a girl's giggle.

"Put me down, silly Daddy," she ordered. "I'm too big to be swung around like that now," she added proudly.

"You're never too big to be my little girl." This was followed by another round of giggling.

My attention was brought away from their conversation to the one between Carlisle and the wolves by the sound of my name.

"We don't know how she'll react to Nessie's blood," Carlisle stated seriously. "And obviously Alice can't see it because of yours and Nessie's involvement."

"I still don't think we should take this risk with Nessie. We should test her control elsewhere before allowing her anywhere near her," a husky voice stated, sounding slightly over-protecting in my book. I guessed this was Renesmee's "soul mate" Jacob. Though a part of me agreed with him, _why were we testing my self-control with a member of their family?_ They would all hate me if anything happened to her, and I would no doubt have to leave. _Maybe I should just leave now, before I killed anyone._

"Amelia," Alice growled at me. Everyone looked at me in alarm. "You're not leaving," she clarified, clearly as a way to show everyone she hadn't seen me killing anyone.

"Better with Nessie, surrounded by vampires and wolves who will stop her before she could harm anyone, than with some poor defenceless human where we can't do anything." Carlisle's reply to Jacob from outside helped to calm me down. They knew what they were doing. They wouldn't let me kill anyone.

"Doc's right, Jake," another male voice said, that must be Seth.

"I still don't see why I have to be here," a female voice grumbled. That must have been the Leah they mentioned, whoever she was.

"I needed as many wolves as possible to help protect Nessie."

"And of course you couldn't drag Quil and Embry away from their imprints to help protect your bloodsucker love," she replied bitterly. _Bloody hell, what is her problem?_

"Sis, like it or not Ness is Jacob's imprint. And she's our family as well." So, Seth and Leah were siblings, I deduced, but how was Nessie their family?

"Thank you, Seth," Bella said to him gratefully.

"No problem, sis." _Wait, Bella is his and Leah's sister as well?_ Interesting family - two werewolves and the human who married a vampire. They didn't even mention that part in their already fucked-up little back-story. But didn't the wolves used to hate the vampires? So I doubted Bella's brother and sister were impressed by her decision. Surely they would have stopped her?

Outside, Edward laughed.

"What could possible be funny right now, Leech?" Jacob growled.

"Can we not resort to name calling, please?" Carlisle interjected.

"Not in front of Renesmee, boys," Bella reprimanded.

"Sorry. Bella is Leah and Jacob's step-sister, Amelia. Their parents got married after everything that happened," Edward called to me. "She was trying to figure out why two wolves would allow their human sister to marry a vampire," he told the others.

"I want to meet her. Can I please, Daddy?"

"Haven't you told her?" Edward asked someone, incredulously.

"No, I didn't want to scare her or see her upset. Would you have preferred if I'd brought her home scared out of her wits?" Jacob replied.

"No, of course not, but you should have given her some warning."

"You shouldn't be making her go through with this. What kind of parent-"

"Don't you dare tell me how to raise my daughter, Jacob Black."

"Jacob. Edward. Not. In. Front. Of. Renesmee." Bella punctuated each word angrily, lowering her voice, though if I could still hear her, I assume her daughter could too.

"Will someone please tell me what's going on?" Renesmee asked.

"Care to explain, Edward?" Jacob growled.

"Jacob, be nice to Daddy!" Renesmee ordered, sounding like her mother earlier.

"Maybe I should explain," Carlisle said with a sigh.

"What's going on, Granddaddy Carlisle?" I stopped focusing as he explained to her my newborn status. I had to concentrate on not killing her. What was it Carlisle had said on the plane? Stop breathing? Yes, that was it. If I smelled human blood, it was best to stop breathing. The sound of seven footsteps and four heartbeats was getting ever closer. So I stopped breathing.

Three Quiletes walked through the door first. They were giants; the two men must have been about seven foot, and the woman about six. I made sure not to breathe. They stopped in front of Rosalie and Emmett. Carlisle appeared from behind them and stood to the side of them. Instantly, his eyes travelled to where I stood. I wished there were some way to convey to him that I had no intention of killing his granddaughter. I couldn't see the doorway anymore, blocked as it was by all the people standing in front of me. _Was I really this dangerous? _But I could hear the quickly thumping heartbeat as it entered the room. _Don't breathe, don't breathe,_ I chanted to myself. It was an unusual feeling, I didn't need the oxygen anymore, but being without the sense of smell I had become so acclimated to over the last two months was off-putting.

I realised all eyes on were on me, waiting for my next move. I stayed perfectly still and didn't move, not knowing what would happen if I did.

"Well, that was anti-climatic," Emmett quipped.

"You're not breathing are you, Amelia?" Carlisle asked. I shook my head, knowing that to answer out loud I would need to take in air.

"You need to breathe, to acclimatise yourself to the scent." _What? They wanted me to breathe? Even though her scent would apparently make me want to kill her?_

"If you want to live our lifestyle, Amelia, you have to get used to ignoring the scent of humans. You can't hold your breath forever." I heard Edward's voice from behind the wall of werewolves. _Can't I just stay in the house, away from humans, forever then?_

"That would be incredibly boring and nearly impossible. Breathe, Amelia."

So I did. It was a sensory overload after holding my breath for so long. The first scent that hit me was nauseating, a smell that could only be described as canine. It was overpowering, yet beneath it there was a different smell. It was sweet and succulent, a mixture of roses and something else, something delicious. All the other scents in the room faded to my senses. I felt my throat burn more than it ever had before. It was parched and I needed something to cool it. That sweet delicious smell called to me, telling me it was what I needed. What I wanted. What I had to have.

Everything became a blur then. I was suddenly aware of two pairs of ironclad hands on my arms, restraining me. I growled at them. I didn't know or care who they were; they were stopping me from getting to that scent. There was a cacophony of sounds and shouts around me, but I wasn't paying any attention to anything other than that sweet, delicious smell. I threw off both pairs of hands without thinking, but next thing I knew, I ran into something solid in front of me and fell backwards slightly. Then I was pushed onto the floor, with six pairs of hands holding me down. I struggled against them, still too focused on that smell to consider anything else. I had to find its source. It was the only thing that could cool the inferno in my throat.

"You don't want to kill her. She's my daughter remember? You didn't want to kill her. We all love her," I heard a voice say to me among the madness of sounds.

_Renesmee. Bella and Edward's daughter. The little girl who had been so eager to meet me_. _I was trying to kill her._ But even as I realised what I was doing, I couldn't stop. Her scent was too compelling. I was going to kill the innocent child.

"Stop breathing again, Amelia," a different voice ordered. _Stop breathing._ It was the only hope either of us had now. With great difficulty, I forced myself to stop. Slowly, my sense of smell disappeared, but the burn in my throat persisted, and there was nothing I could do to rid myself of the memory.

Without the compelling scent, I was able to come to my senses. I was lying on the floor with six vampires holding me down. Two of them were behind me. I couldn't see their faces, but in my range of sight were Rosalie, Emmett, Edward, and Carlisle. I tried to sit up, but was forced back down again.

"She just wants to sit up," Edward said. The hands on my shoulders were suddenly pushing me up to a sitting position, but they remained loosely clasping me.

My attention was instantly caught by what stood by the front door. Three giant wolves hovered in the entrance. Bella hadn't been joking when she said they were massive. She stood behind them, and beside her stood a girl of about twelve. She had long, curly bronze hair that reached halfway down her back and these wide chocolate brown eyes that seemed to show you the depths of her soul. She was looking at me with a mixture of fear and curiosity. She seemed so young and sweet and innocent.

_I'd tried to kill her._

I forced myself to look away. Alice and Esme were standing to the side of me, looking hesitant. Jasper and Carlisle had probably told them to stay out of my way so I didn't harm them. I would have hurt them too, had they stood in my way, I realised with horror. _These people, who had been nothing but good to me, and I hadn't cared at all about what I was doing to them._

"Amelia," Carlisle said. I snapped my attention back to him. His eyes brimmed with concern and compassion. _I've just tried to kill his granddaughter, and he is still concerned about me? What if I had killed her?_ _Surely then he'd have spent every day from now on regretting his decision to save me. He didn't deserve that kind of regret. Neither did Harry. Where was Harry anyway? Had he left in disgust after seeing I most certainly wasn't 'the nicest person he has ever met'?_

"Harry's behind you, Amelia." Edward was clearly rummaging around my head again.

"Amelia." One pair of hands left my shoulders as Harry crouched down beside me. My eyes flickered over to look at his, and they were worried and concerned, just like Carlisle's. More remorse flooded me. "I'm right here. Everything's going to be okay. We won't let anything happen."

My eyes flickered back over to Renesmee, her soulful brown eyes on a child's face. Harry was right - nothing was going to happen to her because of me. I would make sure of that.

The next thing I knew, I was standing. All six hands had left me. Rosalie, Emmett, Edward, and Carlisle all stood in front of me again, clearly ready to stop me should I launch another attack.

Instead, still being careful not to breathe, I headed in the opposite direction, toward the back door and ran out of it. I ran away from the house where I didn't belong. The house I didn't deserve to live in.


	9. Running and Searching

**9. Running and Searching**

April 2010

Canadian Wilderness

_Amelia_

I didn't know where I was or how I'd got here. I didn't care. I just ran. Ran away from innocent brown eyes and concerned gold ones. Ran away from the monster I'd clearly become. The monster that would attack an innocent little girl without a second thought. That would attack someone who was dearly beloved by those who had saved her, taken her in, and accepted her.

I had thought I wasn't a vampire, or at least that I was less of a vampire then the others, but clearly I was wrong. I was more of a vampire than them; no one else had tried to kill an innocent child. It didn't matter to me that I was what they called a newborn - what sort of excuse is that? _'Oh I'm so sorry, Bella and Edward. I killed your daughter because I'm not yet use to not killing people.'_ I had not been killing people for eighteen years. The Amelia I used to be wasn't a murderer, she would never even have considered it. The monster I was now would do it without a seconds hesitation.

I stopped suddenly. I didn't want to run anymore, every step could be taking me closer to a town or city, closer to people whose lives I would want to take without a second thought. _What do I do now? Where can I go?_

I don't know why I had been running anyway - I had nowhere to run to. No home to return to.

I was across an ocean from my real home in Britain and could never return. I would never sit in that pink bedroom again and be able to do something as normal as sitting in my big pink computer chair and Facebooking my friends. Nor would I ever sit at my desk doing coursework again. Or curl up in my warm bed to watch a DVD or read. It all seemed so simple now. My biggest worry had been what to wear to the upcoming party or if my coursework would be done on time. I wonder if my parents would change that room or leave it as it was in the hope I'd return.

As for that big white house in Oregon, I couldn't return there either. Not after what I'd done. They wouldn't want me; I didn't understand why they had to begin with. _Why would anyone want me around? My own friends hadn't wanted me around enough to not push me down a flight of stairs and leave me to die_.

I collapsed onto the forest floor and cried desperate sobs. I had nowhere to go. I couldn't go back to being Amelia Hunter anymore than a dead person can come back to life. _Or maybe that is the same thing,_ I thought bitterly. Amelia Hunter had been a living, breathing human with a life ahead of her; all I was now was her corpse. A walking, talking corpse, yes, but still a corpse. A blood sucking, would-be-murderer of a corpse, at that. And almost inevitably a murdering corpse someday. I couldn't avoid humans forever, but I could try. I could try to stick to the forests and wilderness, and animals. This is what I'd become – a vampire with no home, no family, and no foreseeable future. In other words – no hope.

* * *

_Harry_

Carlisle, Alice, and me had followed Amelia's haphazard trail for days, crossing the Canadian border last night. We had no choice but to follow her as she fled the house, we couldn't just let her leave with no guidance. As far as Carlisle was concerned, she was still his responsibility; he was the one who had created her. If she really didn't want to stay with us then she needed to know more about the way of nomads. I really couldn't imagine her leaving that way. I had lived as a nomad for over a century and it was not a pleasant life. Definitely not the sort of life I would wish upon someone like Amelia. I wanted to convince her to return, the idea that she never would cut through me like a knife.

Her newborn speed had given her the ability to stay ahead of us, as did the fact that she had not yet decided where she going. According to Alice it appeared she was just running without a purpose.

"She's stopped running. She's collapsed on the floor crying. We should find her in ten minutes," Alice informed us. She had been surprisingly keen to help, and of course her visions were invaluable in our search. With renewed purpose we followed her trail.

Just as Alice predicted, ten minutes later we found her. Her scent washed over me. It was like the sweetest of candies to a child, the ripest of whiskies to an alcoholic, the finest heroin to an addict.

She was lying on the forest floor, her head in her arms, crying loudly. Her wild brunette curls covered her face, they had leaves and twigs stuck in them, and her dress was mud-streaked and frayed in places.

She looked up at the sound of our arrival. Her burgundy eyes were sad and I could see the tracks her venom tears had left as they criss-crossed down her face.

"What are you doing here?" she asked surprised. Her minor personalities weren't flying around her as usual; actually there was no other scent to her except her main one. It was like she had been numbed.

"We came to find you," Carlisle replied.

"Why?"

Alice sighed at her question before answering. "How many times do I have to tell you we don't want you to leave?"

"Why wouldn't you?"

"Because you're a part of our family."

"No, I'm not."

"Oh, stop being so stubborn. Yes you are."

"Alice," Carlisle warned her gently. "Though she's right, Amelia, as long as you want to be a part of our family then you are."

"But I … How can I return after …"

"I won't lie to you Amelia, it takes years, decades even, to master self control. But if you want to then you can. And you have to try," Carlisle told Amelia, and she nodded.

"I want to go back, but I don't think I can."

"Why not?" Carlisle asked.

"You were in the room when I tried to kill your granddaughter, right?" she asked sarcastically.

"If you wish to come back with us you're welcome to, but you will have to work on control. You will have to fight that bloodlust around Nessie."

"Yeah, you're coming back!" Alice shouted victoriously, clearly Amelia had made her decision. "Come on, Carlisle, we'll go tell the others, these two can follow." She was grinning now, though I had no idea why or what she up to. Her scent had become overwhelmingly optimistic. _What is she planning?_

She skipped over to me and whispered, "Talk to her," in my ear, before skipping away again.

"Come on, Carlisle."

Carlisle looked curiously at her and then back at the two of us, but before he could ask any questions Alice grabbed his wrist and pulled him away. The two of them disappeared.

"We should get going," I said to Amelia, offering her my hand to help her up, not that she needed it. She grabbed hold of it and pulled before I could, sending me flying onto the floor next to her.

"Oops. Sorry." I'm fairly certain if she still could have she would have blushed. "I don't get it. I tried to kill that innocent girl, why are you all acting so nice to me? I'm a terrible person," she wailed.

"How many times do I have to tell you that you're the nicest person I've ever met?" I whispered fervently to her.

"Hmph. Well I think your spidey-senses are acting up," she replied grumpily, crossing her arms. Her reply made no sense to me.

"My … my what now?" I asked.

"Your," she threw her arms up in despair, "it doesn't matter." She turned away from me.

"O…K." I shook my head in confusion, but remembered we had much more important matters to discuss. "Listen to me, Amelia." I gently held her face and turned it towards me. "You are the nicest person I've ever met." I concentrated on her scent again - it intoxicated me as usual. Then I stared at her tear strained beautiful face. I wanted to show her I meant it. That, far from being a terrible person, she was special. That she was by far the most amazing person I'd ever met. And then, without thinking about it, I kissed her. Our lips met only briefly, but it was the most wonderful sensation I had felt in a hundred and fifty years of immortality. We broke apart and she stared at me, her eyes showing surprise.

It was in that moment I faced the realisation I'd been staring down for the last two months. _I love her._

**I'm not entirely certain if there is anyone reading this story on this site, so if you are, I'd love a review!**


	10. Meet Your Fellow Freaks

**10. Meet Your Fellow Freaks**

April 2010

Canadian Wilderness

_Amelia_

I stared at Harry in shock. _Did he … did he just kiss me? _For a few long seconds neither of us said anything.

"Why … why did you do that?" I finally managed to ask, still in shock.

He stammered, "I … I … I lo ….I'm sorry,"

"No, no don't be. Do, do it again."

"What?" Instead of answering, I kissed him again. I needed to know he had meant something by it. That, far from not wanting me around, he wanted to kiss me. This was the man who had deemed me worth saving when I had been left to die. I needed to know he still felt that way; that, despite what I'd done, he could still see me as worth saving, worth kissing. I threw my arms around his neck and pulled him closer, kissing him more passionately. Harry responded with equal vigour, much to my delight.

"I," he looked down and shook his head slightly. When he looked back up he had determination shining in his eyes. "I love you." The words were like a balm to my soul. Not only did he want me around, he loved me. Me, the girl whose life had been worth so little it had been thrown away for the amusement of bored drunks. Someone loved me. _Not just someone. Harry. Harry Leone Cullen._ There were no words to describe Harry to me in that moment – everything he was, everything he'd done for me, it went beyond words.

"I love you too." The words fall out of my mouth unbidden, but it just felt right to say them.

"Let's go home, Amelia." _Home. The place I'd run away from. _Somewhat reluctantly, I began following him as he headed in, what I could only assume was, the direction of Oregon – I didn't even know where I was at this point.

I froze in front of the door. "I can't. I can't go in there."

"It's okay, Amelia. I'll be right here." He squeezed my hand affectionately, and together we walked through the door.

"Finally," Alice and Jasper said simultaneously - they were waiting for us by the doorway.

Harry laughed. "I take it you know?"

"Of course," Alice replied smugly.

The scent of wet dog washed over me, causing me to nearly gag.

"That is disgusting," I stated. However, I was thankful it was the wolves I could smell, and not the tempting scent of Renesmee.

"You don't smell so nice yourself," a youthful voice told me cheerily. I looked up to find Jacob, Seth, and Leah standing in the hallway. Jacob was glaring at me and Leah was scowling. Seth didn't seem angry though; it was probably him who had said the earlier comment.

"I'm sorry," I said, mainly in Jacob's direction.

"So you should be," he growled. I felt Harry wrap his arm around me protectively.

"Oh great, more vampire love," Leah said sarcastically.

"I … I want to go apologize to Renesmee," I said.

"Over my dead body," Jacob said.

Just then the same cloying scent from before washed over me. I instantly stopped breathing, though I knew if I were going to speak to her, I would have to breathe eventually. Cautiously, I took a small breath. The back of my throat burned, but I knew I had to fight it.

"You can do this, Amelia," Harry whispered in my ear. _I can do this. I can do this._

"I want to speak to her," I insisted. The act of speaking caused venom to pool into my mouth. I concentrated on the different part of her scent, the part that smelled like roses. The vampire side, I suddenly realized.

Impulsively, I followed the scent. However, I was still in my proper mind, following for the purpose of apologizing, not to kill. I felt three pairs of stone hands pull me back, as the three people in front of me began to shake.

"I just want to apologize. Nothing will happen, right, Alice?" I turned to the small psychic vampire, hoping she would be able to back my argument, and needing reassurance myself.

"I don't know. I can't 'see' the wolves or Ness, remember? I don't see Bella or Edward grieving in the near future though."

"I need to put this right, please," I begged. The surrounding wolves and vampires all shared a significant look, before encircling me. Harry still held my hand from his place in the circle.

"Let's go, leech," Jacob ordered. Our strange ensemble walked toward the living room. This close up the stench of wolf was so strong I could barely smell anything else, for which I was thankful.

As we stopped in the middle of the room, I felt all eyes on us. The rest of the Cullen family were all here. Renesmee's scent mixed in with that of the wolves, making it much less potent.

I looked over Jacob's shoulder at the young girl sitting between her parents.

"I'm sorry, Renesmee," I said, trying to sound as sincere as possible. The words seemed somewhat empty in light of all I'd done.

"It's OK. It wasn't your fault." Renesmee sounded very mature as she spoke the words. Some of her scent drifted over and my throat burned more. I decided I had pushed my limit enough for today.

"I'm going to go get a drink. Hey, I can actually say 'does anyone else want one' now, without being looked at like I'm stupid. So, does anyone else want one?"

"What?" all three wolves asked.

"Does anyone else want one?" I repeated. They looked quizzically at each other.

"Erm…no, thanks," Seth finally replied.

"Okay." I headed towards the kitchen; our interlocked hands meant Harry was still with me.

"Well, that went alright," I said conversationally.

"You did brilliantly," Harry whispered, placing a gentle kiss on my cheek. "This is slightly weird, isn't it?" he asked.

"Yes, but slightly weird is good," I replied. I pulled him close to me and kissed him again.

We pulled apart suddenly when a voice went "oh!" behind us. We turned around to find a very confused Esme.

"Sorry," she said with a smile. "I came to show Amelia something." She opened the cupboard and got something out of it. "I bought some chocolate milkshake. You said you missed chocolate."

"Thanks, Esme," I said as I hugged her. It was heart warming to me that someone would go to that much effort for me.

I heard Emmett's booming laugh coming from the living room.

"That's right, Amelia Cullen, the world's freakiest vampire," he said to someone.

"Amelia Cullen?" I murmured.

"You're a part of this family now," Esme said. "And we love you. Well, I'll leave you two alone now."

I jumped on to the counter and began drinking the milkshake Esme had gotten out of the fridge. Harry jumped up next to me.

"We have chairs, you know?" he told me. I shrugged. He wrapped his arm around my waist.

"What's wrong?" he asked gently. I shrugged again. "Amelia," he said beseechingly.

"It's just a lot to take in," I replied, unable to find the words for everything that bothered me.

"Amelia?" I looked up to find Leah stood in the doorway. "Do you mind?" she asked Harry. He looked at her quizzically, before jumping down off the counter.

"I think Leah wants to talk to you," he said. "I'll be back soon," he promised, giving me a gentle kiss on the cheek before leaving.

"Hi," I said uncertainly. Leah pulled out one of the chairs and sat down.

"I know this may seem a little strange, but your … family was just telling me that you're, well, a-"

"Freak?" I supplied for her.

"That's one way of putting it. Did you know there are no other female werewolves?"

I shook my head. "That must suck."

She snorted sarcastically. "That's one way of putting it. I'm a freak too."

"Me too," a voice I recognised as Renesmee's chimed in. She stood in the doorway with her parents. I took another swig of the milkshake as her scent washed over me, concentrating on the chocolate taste rather than delicious temptation. _I never thought I'd find something I'd prefer to chocolate, but we have a winner._

"So what? Are we starting a club or something?" I asked sarcastically.

"It's not nice to feel alone, like the only one," Leah said. I realized she was trying to help me.

"Thank you," I said sincerely. "If you don't mind me asking, what happened to you?"

She snorted. "That's a different story, for a different day." Then she stood up and walked out of the kitchen.

I took another gulp of chocolate milkshake as my throat continued to burn from Renesmee's continued presence. Her brown eyes focused on the bottle in my hand.

"Can you eat food too?" she asked, intrigued. "I can eat food, but I don't like it very much. Except pancakes. Pancakes are my favorite," she said solemnly. "Can I have pancakes for breakfast tomorrow, Daddy?"

"Maybe. Come on princess, do you want to play piano with Daddy again?" She squealed with delight and followed her father out of the room.

_Thanks Edward, _I thought after him. He had no doubt picked up on the panic in my mind that stemmed from being so close to Renesmee. Or maybe he was just protecting his daughter from me. Either way, I was thankful.

"How are you?" Bella asked.

"Been better. Been worse," I replied nonchalantly. "Do you think Renesmee would like it if I made her pancakes for breakfast tomorrow, as a way of making it up to her? I know making breakfast doesn't exactly even out trying to kill someone but-"

"I'm sure she'd love that," Bella said with a smile, cutting across my rambling.

I hopped off the counter and followed Bella into the room where the rest of the family were sitting. I went and sat down next to Harry, and his arm curled around my waist. Bella sat down next to Edward and I smiled when I noticed his arm do exactly the same.

We actually had a fun evening. I spent most of the night playing games on the X-Box and Wii with everyone but Jacob, Renesmee, Carlisle, and Esme, who were all upstairs. I beat Emmett twenty times at the 'retarded knitted cow game'. I watched on as the other Cullen siblings got into a battle of the bands on Guitar Hero. Alice kept complaining because she couldn't see who would win. Even Rosalie, who admittedly spent most of the evening watching on, stony faced, cracked a smile when Emmett pretended to do a guitar solo on his controller. Overall, it was a great evening. I actually felt normal – being silly and joking around with these people. It didn't feel like I was a freak, like this was a room full of vampires and wolves. It just felt like a bunch of friends, having a good time. I remembered what Leah had said about not feeling alone and for the moment, I didn't.

By morning it was just Harry and I left in the living room. We had spent the last couple of hours sitting together in each other's arms, talking about silly things. Above us I heard the sounds of Renesmee and the wolves getting up.

"Time to make some pancakes," I told Harry.

"You need any help?"

"Depends – when was the last time you actually cooked something?"

Harry pretended to think for a few seconds. "OK, good point."

"I'll be fine, go beat Emmett and Jasper at … whatever stupid war game it is you play."

"I don't play the war games. They're not as much fun when you've actually seen the wars with your own eyes," he said sadly.

I looked at him quizzically. "Aren't those games set in, like, the World Wars?" Harry raised his eyebrows at me. "Oh!" I said as the penny dropped. "You saw both … you're going to explain that to me as soon as I've finished making pancakes."

I waltzed around the kitchen happily. First making the mixture in a large jug, then pouring each pancake out into four pans which all had their own ring on the hob. I would have the first batch finished by the time they got downstairs, and I could make the second while they ate.

"What are you doing in here, leech? Don't tell me you eat too?" Jacob said rudely as he walked into the kitchen.

Renesmee skipped in to the room. The familiar scent of her blood washed over me. I grabbed the drink I had placed on the counter for this purpose and gulped. Though the cool liquid came nowhere to near erasing the burn, it made it tolerable. "Hi, Auntie Amelia. What are you doing?" Renesmee asked. That took me by surprise. _I'm struggling to not to kill her and she's calling me 'Auntie.' _A surge of affection for the sweet little child rushed through me.

Ignoring Jacob, I addressed Renesmee. "Making pancakes."

"You know, I usually do that for her," Jacob stated, walking over to take my place in front of the oven.

"Well, you can sit down and relax. They're nearly ready anyway."

He looked critically at the pancakes on the hob. "What the hell are you doing?"

"Making pancakes. What does it look like?" I said defensively.

"It looks like you're doing wrong," he said as he tried to push his way in front of the oven.

"You know, I'm trying to be nice, would it kill you to do the same?" I snapped. I was trying to make amends and he was being a pain in the arse about it.

"Not my fault you're doing it wrong," he muttered darkly, but I heard him loud and clear, and I suspect everyone else did too.

"Jacob, stop being mean to Amelia. She's trying to be nice," Renesmee spoke up, managing to sound more like an adult than either Jacob or me. "Come sit with me, Jakey." Still grumbling under his breath, Jacob went and sat next to her.

_At least he listens to the three-year-old. Or twelve-year-old. Or whatever._

"Something smells nice," Seth announced cheerily as he and his sister walked in. They both went and sat at the table. Leah attempted a smile in my direction but it came out as more of a grimace.

"Pancakes are ready," I declared. I grabbed four plates out of the cupboard and put a pancake on each. I placed each down in front of a person, and then pointed to the selections of fillings I'd placed in the middle of the table. "There's syrup, lemon juice, sugar, chocolate spread, and jam." All four looked at their plates and then at me.

"Erm… Amelia, it's going to take more than one pancake to make us full," Seth told me.

"I told you, you were doing wrong," Jacob said smugly.

"No, I'm going to make the next batch while you eat that one, and so on, and so on," I explained. _Anyone would think they'd never eaten pancakes before._

"Why is there lemon juice?" Renesmee asked.

"For your pancakes," I told her. _Wasn't that obvious. _

"Who has lemon juice on pancakes?" Leah interjected, speaking for the first time.

"Doesn't everyone? You put some lemon juice on, roll it up, and sprinkle the sugar on top." They all looked at me like I'd gone mad. This was not how I'd envisioned my attempt at making it up to Renesmee, by making her favorite breakfast, would go. To start with, they were supposed to be happily eating the pancakes.

"Who eats pancakes like that?" Seth asked.

"Everybody!" I shouted, getting annoyed. "Everybody eats pancakes like that!" _Had I done it wrong? No! This is how I'd made pancakes at home, as a human. They're just being annoying!_

"Are you gonna eat your damn pancakes or not?" I snapped.

Seth reached for the bottle of lemon juice. "So you put the lemon juice in the pancake? Roll it up? Then put sugar of top." He did each action as he spoke. "Hey, this is good!"

"Told you I knew what I was doing," I said smugly.

"Pass me the lemon juice please, Seth," Renesmee requested. I turned back to the hob to make the next batch as I heard both her and Leah begin to eat their pancakes.

"Try it, Jakey, it's good."

"Yeah, man, try it. The freaky vampire makes good pancakes."

"Even I ate mine, so eat up, all mighty Alpha."

I gave them all a new pancake once they'd eaten up.

"So, did you like them?" I asked.

Seth, Leah, and Renesmee all nodded while proceeding to eat their second pancake.

"I don't see why you can't cook pancakes the normal way." Jacob grumbled.

"Normal way? This is how you cook pancakes." Suddenly realization hit. "Oh … this is how you cook pancakes in Britain. You do it differently in America, don't you?"

"Wow! Who knew the British didn't know how to cook pancakes," Jacob said sarcastically.

"We know how to cook pancakes. We even have a day for them. Maybe you're the ones who don't know how to cook them."

"You have a day for them?" Seth asked.

"Yeah, pancake day."

"Imaginatively named," Leah pointed out.

"Just admit you don't have a clue what you're talking about, leech," Jacob sneered at me.

"You know what," I said, now on the verge of tears. I've always hated the fact that whenever I get mad I start to cry. It means people coo around me, so I always end up breaking down, when all I really wanted to do was to shout at them. "I was just trying to help. To make up for what happened."

"You think cooking pancakes makes up for trying to kill a child?" Jacob growled. His body began to shake.

"Jacob, mate, calm down."

No! No it doesn't! How can I ever make up for what I did? I tried to murder her – murder her for God's sake!

"That's enough, Jacob." I didn't know where Bella and Edward came from, but Edward was holding a refraining hand on Jacob's shoulder.

"How can you forgive her?" Jacob shouted at the pair of them. "She tried to kill your daughter!"

I tried to kill their daughter! I tried to kill their daughter!

The overwhelming desire to run filled me again. Without listening to the rest of the argument, I fled the room. Jacob was right – I didn't deserve to be forgiven.

_What do I do now?_

"Amelia?" Harry's voice caught my attention. I couldn't leave him again. I couldn't be alone. I just couldn't face it. The tears I had been holding back began to fall, becoming huge racking sobs. Harry wrapped me into his arms and I cried on to his shoulder, thankful that he was still there. In that one moment I just felt overwhelmed by everything that had happened. This wasn't how my life was supposed to turn out. Nothing interesting ever happened to me. I was supposed to be sitting at home in London, living the boring day to day routine I'd live for years, and should have been doing for years to come. I wasn't supposed to be an ocean away from the place I'd lived all my life, in a house full of vampires, wolves, and hybrids, where I couldn't even cook pancakes properly. So I clung onto Harry as I cried on his shoulder, because if there was only one thing I was certain off in this strange new life on mine, it was that he loved me.

* * *

**I have nothing against American style pancakes (I ate them nearly every day for breakfast when I was in New York a few years ago), I just don't know how you cook them.**

**Reviews are greatly appreciated :)**


	11. Family Moments

**11. Family Moments**

April 2010

Astoria, Oregon

_Amelia_

I'm not entirely certain how I ended up having a paint fight with the Cullen matriarch, but I did. Admittedly, I probably started it. I'm sure if I used my perfect recall I could have figured it out, but I honestly wasn't that bothered.

We both looked around at the paint-splattered room.

"Do you think they'd buy it if we claimed we meant for it to look like this?" I asked uncertainly.

"Not for a second," Esme replied.

"Be fun to watch their reactions though," I said wonderingly.

"Well, Carlisle should be home soon. Do you want to give it a try?" Esme asked me, a mischievous smirk on her face.

"Yeah! We should, like, act proper serious though," I replied enthusiastically.

"You know, apparently Carlisle could never hate anything designed by me, so this should be interesting."

"You're a mischievous one, Mummy Cullen, you know that?" She smiled at my nickname for her as I'd known she would.

Twenty minutes later, we heard Carlisle arrive home from the hospital.

"Up here," Esme shouted. "Do you like it?" she asked as her husband walked into the room. I watched on from the side as she smiled sweetly and Carlisle quickly composed his face.

"It's, um, different," Carlisle finally said.

"Don't you like it?" Esme asked, doing her very best to sound wounded. I resisted the urge to giggle and tried to keep my face straight.

"No, no, love. It looks lovely. It's just a little different to your usual designs," Carlisle said quickly.

"I think I might paint some of the other rooms like this," Esme said innocently.

"That's certainly an interesting idea, dear."

"Maybe with brighter colors though," Esme continued. I had no idea how she was managing to speak so convincingly without smiling; I was struggling to keep my laughter in on the sidelines. Carlisle's face was a picture, though he kept trying to hide it, which just made it funnier. "How about purple? Or green?" Esme continued.

"Whatever you think would look nice, darling." Carlisle's confusion was evident in his voice despite his best efforts.

Esme giggled, clearly unable to hold her amusement in anymore. "No, Carlisle," she said between her laughter, "the correct answer is 'no, Esme, don't paint our house purple and green, it'll look horrible.'" We were both laughing our heads off by now while Carlisle watched us, bemused.

"You were winding me up, weren't you?" he asked.

"No, Carlisle, I really want to paint our house purple and green," Esme said sarcastically.

"You're a little minx, you know that?" Carlisle said before pulling her into a deep kiss. I cleared my throat purposefully to remind them off my presence.

"Oh, hello, Amelia," Carlisle said, looking a little sheepish. "And what part did you play in this little trick?"

"Don't look at me, it was your wife's idea," I said.

"Yes, but you started the paint war to begin with," Esme reminded me.

"Well, yeah," I agreed. "I think I'm going to leave you two alone now. I might go hunting once Harry returns from school."

"Actually, Amelia, you seem to have enough control to go into the forest to hunt alone now."

"OK, Carlisle," I said as I left. I got to the doorway, but as always I couldn't resist saying what was on my mind. "By the way, that was the least subtle thing ever in the history of unsubtle things. You may as well have just said 'get the hell out of my house, Amelia, I want to fuck my wife'," I called as I left the room.

"Amelia!" they both shouted at me.

"Sorry, 'make love' or whatever you want to call it. And I'm going to stop talking now because this is just getting creepy. Eww, parent sex." I scrunched my nose up and shook my head in over-exaggerated disgust, even though they couldn't see me anymore. I heard them laughing behind me. I stopped at my room to pick up a book before leaving the house – I had no intention of returning until a lot of time had passed, and therefore I would know it would be safe.

I was happily reading in the middle of the forest when I picked up a familiar scent on the wind. My face split involuntarily into a smile.

"Alice sent me to tell you it's safe to return home now," Harry said as he walked up to me.

I shrugged. "I'm quite happy here. Even happier now."

Harry laughed and came to sit next to me. "I missed you," he whispered in my ear.

"I missed you too," I whispered back. Our lips met and I allowed myself to be overtaken by the delightful sensation. Too soon for my liking, Harry pulled away. I tried to pull him back to me but he resisted.

"What's wrong?" I asked, trying to disguise my hurt.

"Sorry," he mumbled. "It's just, where, or should I say when, I come from, you wouldn't do something so risqué when you were only courting."

I knew he was trying to be serious but I couldn't stop myself from laughing. It was the word 'courting' that sent me over the edge. It was a word my Grandma used to use and it always amused me because it sounded so silly.

"What's so funny?" Harry asked. This time it was his turn to be defensive.

"Sorry. It just sounded so old-timey, especially 'courting'." I did little quote marks with my hands when I said the word. "People don't 'court' nowadays." I couldn't hide the amusement from my voice.

"What do they do then?" he asked.

"I dunno. Date. Go out. See each other."

"Well, that sounds even stupider in my opinion," he huffed.

"When were you born?" I asked curiously. I always forgot the Cullens were decades, or even centuries, older than me. I couldn't quite get my head around that sort of lifespan, and they all looked so young, it was easy to forget they weren't actually in their twenties or teenagers.

"1829," he answered.

"So that's like, Victorian era?"

"Just before, I was eight when she took the throne."

"When were you changed?" I had always wondered what age Harry was frozen at, as he didn't look much older than me, but he had a much more mature air to him.

"1848. I was nineteen."

"What happened? You said on the plane you were changed by someone other than Carlisle." I had sensed this was a hard topic for Harry, but I couldn't help but be curious. Didn't I deserve to know more about the man I loved?

"Like I said. It's a long story." I could tell that meant he still had no wish to talk about it.

"What was it like? The Victorian era, I mean."

"I barely remember it now. It was very different to the world we live in today. You would have been considered a harlot for showing ankle like that, you scandalous women." His eyes travelled briefly over my exposed legs before he looked me in the eyes again. The attention made me almost tingle with excitement. "My father was an industrialist; the industrial revolution was in full swing at that time. My grandfather had been the typical, heavy-fisted factory owner you read about in history books, but my father was more of a radical." I saw his face screw up in concentration. I remembered how blurry my human memories were becoming and wondered how bad it must be after a century and a half had passed. "Before my grandfather died and Father took control of the factories, he worked on a government report looking into the working and living conditions of the working class, and he was shocked by what he found. Do you know what Saltaire is?"

"Yeah, we did it in history. That, um, factory owner guy built a town for his workers so they wouldn't live in such crap conditions, right?"

"Titus Salt? Yeah, he was a friend of Father's. Father wanted to build a town as well; they were going to build them at the same time. Flagship communities – one in the South and one in the North."

"I don't remember learning about another town."

"You wouldn't. Father's never got built," he said sadly.

"What happened?" I asked gently. He looked away, and I had a feeling I had pushed him too far.

"He sounds like a good man, your father," I said, trying to cheer him up, though discussing his presumably long dead father probably wasn't the safest way to do it.

"He was. He was even anti-Empire, and an abolitionist, because he took a trip to Africa in his youth before he married my mother. You didn't get many anti-Empire men in Victorian England. Paradoxically though, despite being what most would have considered a radical, he was also a stern monarchist. He may not have believed in the Empire, but he was glad they at least named the land they snatched after the Queen." He chuckled slightly at the memories. "I blame him for the fact that-" he cut off then uncomfortably and looked away again.

"Harry?" I said beseechingly.

"Whenever Jasper annoys me, I point out that the Confederacy lost the civil war here, and he always replies with the fact that Britain no longer has her Empire. Now for most people from Victorian England that would be a huge insult, but it just makes me happy, because I imagine my father looking down from Heaven and feeling contented as each country gained it's independence over the course of the last century." I smiled at him, but I didn't miss that he still had not explained his hesitation earlier. I decided not to push him.

"Shall we go home then?" he asked, standing up.

"It's definitely safe? We're not going to walk in on Carlisle trying to fuck Esme's brains out?"

Harry gave a shocked snort of laughter. "Thank you for that. That was a mental image I could have done without."

"You're welcome."

* * *

_Harry_

"Do you think you could turn the anxiousness down a notch?" Jasper asked.

"You and Alice could have driven home with Rosalie and Emmett," I retorted back. He shut up. Nobody liked having to share a car with Rosalie and Emmett, our talents made it uncomfortable for Jasper, Edward, or myself. This is why all five of us always ended up crammed into Edward's Volvo, while Rosalie and Emmett got to drive in her BMW by themselves.

I smiled happily when we finally arrived home. Even Cullen driving speed hadn't got me there fast enough. I went upstairs to Amelia's room like a shot. I knocked on her door.

"Come in," she shouted; she still hadn't realized she no longer had to shout. I smiled happily as I walked into her room and her scent washed over me.

"What you reading?" I asked, eyeing the book in her hands. She put it down next to a book with a similar drawing on the front. There was a hint of whimsy to her scent.

"Hey," she said, pulling me down for a kiss. I sat down next to her on the bed, wrapping one arm around her. I picked up the book discarded on her bedside cabinet. "Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone," I read from the front cover.

"Philosopher's," Amelia corrected me. Stubbornness briefly entered the room, making me smile. Only Amelia could make stubbornness smell nice.

"No, love, it definitely says 'sorcerer's'." Amelia simply tutted at me but didn't expand on her comment.

"What's that one?" I asked, looking at the other book.

"The second one. Chamber of Secrets." She said it like I should understand what she meant.

"I read them as a human," she said sadly. "I used to get excited each time a new book came out, but I never went to the store dressed as a witch. I wasn't that bad." Again she spoke like I should understand what she was talking about, but I didn't have a clue. "I'm sure you remember the Harry Potter mania of the noughties?"

That's why I don't understand what's going on. Whatever 'Harry Potter mania' is, it happened while I was starving myself in a cave.

"Ummm," I said hesitatingly. A part of me knew I would have to tell Amelia about my past some day, but I didn't want to. She was so innocent, so oblivious to the vileness of the vampire world outside our cosy little vegetarian family.

"Or not," she continued. "I guess books about wizards don't go down well with vampires. What about vampire books? There's a bit of a trend for vampires in pop culture at the moment," she said with a laugh. "Not that any of it's very accurate. Did you ever watch True Blood or Vampire Diaries?" I shook my head. "I guess you wouldn't. I'm sure if I watched them now they'd seem ridiculous. I don't actually remember much about the plots. True Blood had the creepiest opening credits though."

She leaned across and picked up one of the books. "I've read the first one now. It's weird considering how many times I re-read these books as a child that I'd all but forgotten the plots. It does make it more fun to re-read them again. I guess it's a one-time deal though, because I'm never going to forget now. You should read it. It's a good book, I promise." She passed me the book she had picked up and then picked up the second one. I looked at it, intrigued by this little piece of Amelia's human life.

"Where did you get them from anyway?" I asked.

"I happened to mention to Esme and Bella that I'd read all their books, and all of Carlisle's that aren't medical, which admittedly isn't that many."

I felt my eyebrows rise. "You really do read fast, even for a vampire."

"Anyway, while Alice and Esme were shopping yesterday, Esme remembered what I'd said, and Alice 'saw' that I would like these because I read them as a human." The sad look came over her face again. "I got the first three as a box set for Christmas when I was eight." I noticed the tears beginning to form in her eyes.

My arms tightened around her sobbing form and we simply lay like that for a few minutes.

"Sorry," she finally said.

"It's OK," I murmured, placing a gentle kiss on her forehead.

"How many of these books are there?" I asked.

"Seven. One for each year at Hogwarts." I had no idea what that meant, but I supposed I would find out soon enough as I opened the book she had passed me. Amelia had already returned to reading the second one, snuggling her head against my chest.

I looked at the copyright information. _First published in 1997. The very same year I went into the cave. _With sudden realization, I recognized the fact that most of Amelia's life had taken place while I was in the cave. The trends and the technology that had affected her life and made her who she was today I knew nothing about. We were two very different people, yet we still fit together perfectly.

I guess it's true what they say about opposites attracting.

* * *

_Amelia_

"Are they always this bad?" I asked Bella and Edward.

"Yes," they replied simultaneously. From the garage, Rosalie's screeches at Emmett became louder.

"So what's wrong with Remmett, anyway?"

"You mean Emmett?" Edward asked.

"No, _Remmett_."

He looked at me confused. "Are you purposefully not thinking about what you're talking about so I don't understand?"

_What? No. Remmett. Rosalie and Emmett._

"Like Brangelina," I said out loud for Bella's sake.

"Oh!"

"See, she gets it," I said to Edward. "Tsk, silly Bedward."

"My name's-" Bella cut him off.

"She's means Bedward as in Bella and Edward, right?"

"That's right," I said happily. "Where are Jalice and Cesme?"

"That's-" This time Edward cut Bella off.

"Jasper and Alice, and Carlisle and Esme. I understand now." He and Bella had that gooey look overcoming both their faces so I left, quickly.

"What you looking at?" I asked Alice as I walked into the living room. She was on the computer while Jasper was watching TV. Carlisle, Esme, and Harry were all upstairs in Carlisle's office talking about whatever serious stuff they talked about, and the wolves had taken Nessie out for the day.

"Paris spring line," she replied. I looked over her shoulder. I knew little about 'fashion' as a concept, but I knew what I thought looked nice or not. We spent a good half an hour searching through the dresses, ordering the good, and laughing at the bad.

"Any chance I could drag my beautiful wife away from the computer?" Jasper drawled as he came to stand beside us. Alice went to shut down the computer.

"I'll go on," I chipped in before she did so. She and Jasper left, and I took over Alice's place in the computer seat. After another five minutes, I grew bored of looking at dresses; it wasn't nearly as much fun without Alice to discuss them with.

I clicked on the address bar at the top, but then paused - what website to go on?

_What websites did I go on as human?_

Curiosity overtook me as I made my decision and typed the address into the bar. I wanted to check my Facebook account, to see what comments had been left since I 'disappeared'. As soon as I had logged on I quickly turned my chat status to offline, as that would have been difficult to explain. I knew I wouldn't be able to write any replies or make any comments, I just wanted to look at what other people had wrote. I went to my profile. The page was full of messages from people hoping I would come back soon. I didn't even remember some of them. There was a long message from Katie that had me on the verge of tears. But it was the messages from Holly, Nicole, and Emma that sent me over the edge. They'd sent me messages telling me to come back and that they missed me when they knew exactly what had happened to me and that I was never coming back. An uncontrollable anger filled me and I had the sudden urge to throw the computer across the room. Instead I ran out of the house before I could break anything, stopping once I was in the forest. I took deep breaths to calm myself.

Fifteen minutes later, I finally felt calm enough to return home. I found Carlisle, Esme, and Harry looking at the computer screen confused. My Facebook account was still open.

"That's a little rude, don't you think?" I snapped at them; perhaps I should have stayed in the forest a little longer.

"What is this, Amelia?" Carlisle asked curiously.

"What does it look like?" I asked sarcastically. All three shared a confused look.

"It's Facebook," I explained, though it came out in the same voice you would use to explain something to a three-year-old.

"Amelia," Carlisle said softly, "it isn't safe for you to be online like this. You're supposed to be dead."

"I set it to show me as offline and I'm not stupid enough to actually leave a comment, you know," I told him defensively. "And I'm missing actually," I corrected him.

He sighed. "Yes, but eventually we want people to presume your dead. Anything else would be false hope." I glared at him. I knew what he said was true, but that didn't mean I wanted to accept it.

"Amelia," Harry said my name softly. He came to stand next to me, gently interlocking his hand with mine. I pulled my hand away. I was still annoyed - I didn't want sympathy.

"It's still rude," I snapped. "You shouldn't have been looking anyway! And what do you all understand? You're all billions of years old anyway, you're probably confused by the shiny box thing with the pretty colors." I knew I wasn't making any sense anymore but I was too angry to care.

"Centuries, not billions of years, Amelia," Carlisle corrected me gently with a smile.

"Oh, 'to-ma-to', 'ta-mah-tah.'" I said, purposefully emphasizing the different pronunciations.

"Why are you listing vegetables?" Esme asked confused.

"It's a fruit, actually," I snapped back smugly.

"Amelia," Harry said again, trying to get my attention. Not that I could blame him. _Why was I arguing with Esme over tomatoes again?_

"Just leave me alone!" I shouted at all three of them. Just then Alice and Jasper arrived in the doorway. Jasper was eyeing me accusingly.

"What?" I growled at him. I could see he was resisting the urge to drop into a crouch.

"You're finally acting like a newborn," he said calmly. I felt the strange calming sensation overcoming me again; I didn't fight it or complain this time though. I did need to calm down. "I just wondered why," he continued.

I shrugged. "Because tomatoes are a fruit."

Jasper's eyebrows shot into his hairline. "Weirdest. Newborn. Ever. I need to go find Bella and tell her she has officially lost her title."

I felt my temper increasing once more despite Jasper's influence. "Oh, just shut up already! Unless you want me to give you another scar!" I snapped. I clamped my hands over my mouth the second the words came out, as I realized what I'd said. "I'm sorry," I said quickly, hoping to repair the damage.

"It's fine," Jasper said coolly before leaving, Alice following behind him.

"Amelia?" The remaining three all said gently. I looked into their faces, all full of concern and care I didn't deserve at this moment.

"Can you all do me a favor and leave me the fuck alone for a minute."

"Am-"

"Please!" With one last worried glance in my direction, Carlisle and Esme left the room. Only Harry remained. I couldn't face him right now. "Please, Harry. I just need a moment alone," I pleaded. Reluctantly, Harry followed his adopted parents out of the room.

I collapsed onto the computer chair and placed my head in my hands. _What is wrong with me? What have I done?_

A while later, I heard someone arrive in the room, but I didn't pay any attention to who it was until I heard my name.

"Amelia?" It was the unexpected voice that caught my attention.

"You're the very last person I would have expected to come and check up on me," I said bitterly. Rosalie walked over and looked at the picture on the screen.

"Is that you?" she asked.

"Me and Katie. It was Katie's 18th I was returning from when my friends decided a good drinking game was 'push Amelia down a flight of stairs and see if she lives'."

"Was she was one of them?" she asked softly.

"Katie? No!" I said incredulously.

"You look different," she said, scrutinizing the picture. "Younger. And you've got straight hair."

"It's from year ten." She looked confused. "I don't know what the American equivalent school year is. I was fifteen though. And everyone straightened their hair back then. Never really suited me though."

She gave a sigh. "Look, I know I've been a bit of a …"

"Bitch," I supplied - apparently my insulting people streak wasn't over yet.

She laughed bitterly. "I suppose I deserve that." There was another moment of silence while she looked intently at the picture. "How are you not angry?"

"Not angry?" I asked incredulously. "So far today I've: shouted at Carlisle and Harry over Facebook, snapped at Esme over tomatoes, told Jasper I'd give him another scar, and called you a bitch." It sounded so much worse in list form. "What part of that suggests I'm not angry?"

She laughed bitterly again. "That's just newbornitis, we've all been there."

"'Newbornitis'?" I questioned.

She laughed again, but it was an actual proper laugh this time. "I've been spending too much time with Emmett."

"Makes it sound like a disease. How has Carlisle not come up with a cure yet? Isn't he supposed to be a doctor?" She laughed again, but her face became serious once more.

"I mean, why aren't you angry about what happened?"

"I am," I admitted. "That's why I've been shouting at people today, because I was angry earlier when I saw some messages on here from my so-called friends."

"But you're not angry at Carlisle and Harry? Just like you said a few weeks ago."

I shrugged. "Like I said, they saved me." Her eyes moved from scrutinizing the picture to my face.

"Do you want to know why I've been such a bitch to you?" I nodded - this should be interesting. "You got to keep a part of your humanity. I'd give anything to be human again, or just to have any small part of it back. And you got to, and you don't even seem to understand how lucky you are."

"Lucky? The only part of humanity I want back is being able to go see my family and my friends. I want to stop them from being upset because of me. But I can't. Stupid vampire laws.

"So I can drink a goddamn can of Coke? It doesn't change the fact that I'm an ocean away from my home, that I tried to kill a little girl, or that I'm forever frozen as a teenager. I'm just as stuck as you, Rosalie. You still want to be human now? How many decades down the line? No offence, but everyone you once knew is dead, what the Hell would you gain from it? Look around you. You have a family who loves you, and a husband who loves you. Why the Hell would you want to give that all up?"

"Wouldn't you? If you could go home?"

"I don't know," I admitted. That was a part of the problem. Yes, I loved my family, but I loved the Cullens too. And then there was Harry.

Our conversation was disturbed by the sound of a car pulling up.

"Oh great, the dogs are home," she muttered. She went to walk away.

"Rosalie," I called after her. "You have a lot to celebrate in this life. So do I. Maybe we should actually celebrate it instead of clinging to the past."

She smiled. "Maybe," she agreed, before walking out the room. I clicked off the picture and shut down the computer, realizing the truth in my own words.

Nessie and Leah walked in the door. The second Nessie spotted me she ran up to me, excited. In the last few weeks I had become much more accustomed to her scent. It helped that it was always mixed with the repulsive scent of the wolves.

"We're having our first club meeting tonight," she told me happily.

"Club meeting?" I asked.

"The 'Freaks' club meeting." She scrutinized my face. "What's the matter, Auntie Amelia?" she asked.

"What? Nothing, I'm fine," I said, trying to sound off-hand. She looked at me for a second, walked over to Leah and put her hand on her face, then walked off. "I'm off to tell Mum and Daddy," she called as she left.

"I was being sarcastic," I told Leah. "About the club thing."

"I know. She doesn't have to though," Leah told me. She seemed a lot happier than I remember ever seeing her, or at least a lot less hostile. "What's wrong?" she asked.

"Oh, nothing," I lied.

"Nice try, you have tear tracks all down your face. Which is weird considering I thought vampires couldn't cry?"

"It's a freak thing," I informed her. "It's nothing." She looked at me disbelievingly, but seemed to decide to drop the subject, much to my relief.

A loud bang came from outside.

"Excuse me," she said. "I have to go see what my spaz of a brother and my dipshit of an alpha are doing."

A couple of minutes later, Jacob walked in. He took one look at me and said, "Jeez, what's wrong?"

"What do you care?" I snapped.

"Vampire or not, I can't just leave a crying woman."

"I'm not crying anymore."

"Trying to be nice here," he said, mimicking what I'd said when I was cooking pancakes.

"Yeah, and what's up with that? All the people who hated me are being nice to me, now I've made the people who were nice to me, hate me."

"Who hates you exactly?"

"Harry, Carlisle, Esme, Alice, and Jasper."

"OK, let's start from the top. Harry doesn't hate you – that guy loves you. Why is a mystery to everyone-"

"Thanks," I interjected, though I could tell he was joking. Or I hoped he was anyway.

He laughed before continuing. "As for Carlisle and Esme, I think it's pretty much impossible for them to hate anyone. Hell, they didn't even hate us during the whole vampires-werewolves amenity thing. Alice is so happy and bouncy she can't hold a grudge, and if Alice likes you then Jasper does."

"Thanks," I smiled weakly. "What is with the sudden niceness though?" I asked suspiciously.

He shrugged. "Nessie likes you. I can't be nasty to someone Nessie likes. It's an imprint thing."

"I think I'm beginning to like this imprinting thing." I heard a bitter chuckle from the doorway. Leah was standing there - all happiness vanished.

"Um, I'm going to go find Ness," Jacob said quickly before walking out.

"What's wrong?" I asked Leah.

"Long story short – my boyfriend, ex-boyfriend now, imprinted on my cousin," she said bitterly.

"Oh," I said, at a loss for words. "Sorry." I thought about what I'd said to Rosalie. "You know what I've learned today though?" She looked at me curiously. "You can't live in the past."

She laughed bitterly. "I try. It's not that easy though."

"I'm sorry. I wish I could help but-"

"There's nothing you can do," Leah supplied.

"Yeah," I agreed sadly. I honestly did wish there was something I could do. Nobody deserved to go through something like that, particularly someone like Leah, who underneath the tough interior, seemed like a good person. "Do you want a cup of tea?" I asked.

She laughed, shaking her head. "Could you be any more British?"

"Why are you coming to the 'freaks' club meeting?" I asked Harry, who couldn't hide the smile from his face as we walked down the hallway, his arm around my waist. I had the feeling something was going on.

"I'm the only vampire whose talent links to their sense of smell, do I not qualify?" he asked jokingly.

"If I say yes, does that mean I get to keep you with me?" I asked optimistically.

"Deal," Harry said, sneaking a kiss. We stopped at the top of the stairs and looked down to find the entire Cullen family, plus all three werewolves in the living room.

"Why are you all here?" I asked as we walked down the stairs.

"We're all vampires, werewolves, or hybrids, Amelia. None of us exactly qualify as normal," Renesmee said. She came to stand next to me, placing her hand on my wrist. I saw her suggesting this entire thing to Leah, Jacob, and Seth, followed by getting each member of her family to agree.

"You did all this for me?" It still shocked me that she even liked me, all things considered. She nodded; before I could stop myself I pulled her into a hug, letting go quickly as her scent filled my senses.

"I thought it was a good idea," Leah said. "To know you're not alone."

"Thanks. But I'm still a little bit freakier than you all. By the way, does anyone have any idea why I am the way I am?"

"I have many theories," Carlisle answered. I turned my attention to him. "For example, your transformation was a day shorter than most."

"Well, I'm not complaining about that," I muttered, shuddering. I saw all the vampires in the room do the same.

"You had also been drinking the night of your transformation."

"Could that have affected me?" I asked.

"Maybe. The problem is we have nothing to compare you to."

"You forgot the theory about your venom being slightly defunct nowadays," Harry chimed in.

"Yeah, well, I'm not particularly keen on that one," Carlisle muttered.

"So, basically, the short answer is you don't have a clue."

"Pretty much," Carlisle admitted.

"Anyway, moving on. What's the next order of business for the Freaks Club?"

"Oh!" Emmett shouted. "We need a club leader. I suggest me!"

"Not in a million years, Emmett," Edward said.

"I'll do it," Alice said.

"Na-huh, little sister," Emmett replied.

"I can do it," Jacob said. "I do have prior leadership experience."

"Or I could be allowed to be the leader for a change," Seth suggested. They continued like that for a few minutes, their discussion turned argument slowly getting louder and louder, and more boisterous. Jacob threw a piece of cookie at Seth and all Hell broke loose. Suddenly cookie crumbs were flying everywhere; I blame whoever left the box in Emmett's reach. Somewhere among the ramble we could hear Carlisle and Esme trying to get control of the situation. Harry, Nessie, and I watched from the sidelines.

"What about Nessie?" I suggested over the noise. They all turned to look at me. "It was her idea, after all." Nessie beamed at me.

"Can I?" she asked. Everyone made noises of agreement.

"Well, now that's sorted. You can all sort this mess out," Esme snapped, turning on her children and the wolves, while shaking cookie crumbs out of her hair. There was several mumbled 'yes, Mom' and 'yes, Esme'.

"Do you need some help?" I asked.

"Oh, you don't need to, dear, you weren't the one throwing cookies around," Esme said to me sweetly before glaring at the others. I shrugged

"Sure," Emmett shouted. "Grab a dustbin and brush."

* * *

May 2010

Astoria, Oregon

_Harry_

Amelia was spinning around and around. Her brunette curls flew out around her as she continued to spin. Her dress billowed around her. The tinny sound coming from the headphones suggested she had it on full volume, though I didn't recognize the song, some modern pop thing. Faster and faster she spun, oblivious to the fact that five vampires were watching her from the hallway. The spinning caused the air to shift around as well, throwing wave after wave of her captivating scent at me.

Suddenly she stopped, her orange eyes stared at us, wide with surprise for a moment before she ripped the earphones out of her head, accidentally breaking them.

"Oh crap," she muttered, breaking the magical feel of the moment.

"We'll buy some more," Esme said sweetly. "And language," she added. I don't know if anyone else spotted it, but I saw Amelia begin her eye roll before stopping herself.

"Did you know vampires can't get dizzy?" she asked us. Actually I hadn't, and by the looks on their faces neither did the others, for why would a vampire ever spin around enough to find out?

"Really?" Alice asked. She picked up the iPod in Amelia's hands - a present given to her by our entire family, Edward had put his entire collection on there for her and then Alice had added the top thousand best-selling songs of the 'noughties' according to the UK charts – and placed it into the docking station we had in the living room.

As the music began to play, Amelia grabbed my arms and began to spin us around. The world swirled around me, going faster and faster. I laughed out loud - this was amazing. I had not felt so carefree and happy in so long. We just kept spinning and spinning, until,

CRASH!

Suddenly I found myself flying to the floor. I looked up to find Amelia and the other four on the floor too. They most have joined in, and then we'd crashed into each other. After a second of stunned silence, everyone started to laugh. I looked over at Amelia, who was laughing happily. Her face was lit up with a bright smile. Before I could stop myself, I leaned over and kissed her.

"I love you," I whispered.

"I love you, too," she whispered back.

* * *

**My apologies for the delay, there was some beta issues.**

**By the way, the phrase 'noughties' refers to the decade between 2000-2009. I don't know if it's a purely British saying or not, but my beta didn't understand it so I thought I best clarify.**

**Reviews are greatly appreciated :)**


	12. Curls

May 2010

Astoria, Oregon

_Harry_

I didn't know where the determination had come from, but ever since her eyes had finally turned gold a earlier last week - a lot quicker than a normal vampire's would have, or so I was told by the rest of the Cullen - Amelia was determined to gain some self-control. Depsite her earlier lapse with Nessie, she was making amazing progress. She used her ability to drink human drinks to her advantage to help her supress her thirst.

We were currently sitting on the back seat of Carlisle's car. Amelia was seated in the middle, with me to her left and Alice to her right. Alice had been brought along to watch Amelia's future to make sure she wouldn't lose control. Carlisle and Esme were in the front seats. We stopped at the outskirts of town. I could sense Amelia's determination. Though the four of us barely noticed the distant scent of humans, Amelia's eyes blackened.

"I'm fine. I want to try getting out of the car," she insisted.

"Amelia, I'm not certain-" Carlisle began up front.

"It's fine," Alice said confidently. She got out of the car so that Amelia could get out as well. Feeling apprehensive, I got out too. I could remember what bloodlust felt like as a newborn. This didn't seem safe, especially considering that the last time we'd decided to test her self-control, she had tried to attack Nessie.

I was surprised to discover Amelia was emitting confidence, just like Alice.

"I'm fine," she insisted again. "I think all that time spent not killing Nessie has desensitised me. The chocolate milkshake helps as well." She took another swig from the bottle in her hand. She still radiated nothing but confindence.

"That's good," I told her. I gently took hold of her hand as I stood next to her. "But I have to ask why the sudden determination to test your control?" Up until a week ago she had been nothing but apprehensive towards the idea after the near disaster with Nessie.

"You'll see," she said with a secretive smile. I tried to dissect what her current personality traits were telling me but came up with nothing. _What did I expect? This is Amelia. I'll never be able to predict her._ That didn't really bother me as much as I once would have thought it would. Amelia's unpredictabilty was a part of the woman I loved. It was nice to be surprised for once, and I'm sure whatever Amelia was planning would leave me pleasantly surprised.

"Can we try actually going into Astoria?" Amelia asked. Determination was now coming off her in strong waves again.

"Another day," Carlisle said gently, though he was smiling, as was Esme. Intuition flared as I realized they knew whatever Amelia wasn't telling me.

"Tomorrow?" Amelia asked determindely.

"Maybe the day after," Carlisle said, glancing at his wife. He was being protective, of course. We all, aside from Amelia, knew what tomorrow was, though I had learned the hard way. None of us would mention it outloud, but the Cullen family had an unwritten agreement regarding what happened on the 28th May.

"Sure," Amelia shrugged.

We all got back into the car and drove home. Amelia sat with her head against my shoulder, and I couldn't help but hold her waist, despite the fact we were in a car with my adopted parents and sister.

Once we arrived home, we found Jacob, Seth, Nessie, Edward, and Bella on the driveway surrounding a car. Leah had decided she was going back to La Push. The seemingly cold young woman had always intrigued me. Just like Rosalie, she was actually a much nicer person beneath the surface - deeply protective and loyal for a start.

"Bye, Leah," Amelia said as she skipped over to the car.

"Bye, Amelia," Leah said, giving her a rare smile. Amelia had helped Leah to see she was not the onlt one who was abnormal even amongst the supernatural. We all waved as the car disappeared into the distance.

"I have to go get ready for my shift," Carlisle told us. He and Esme disappeared into the house.

"We're all off on a day-long hunt tomorrow," Edward told Amelia.

"We are?" she questioned. "Anyway, I thought you all hunted a few days ago." Amelia didn't miss the way we all traded significant looks.

"It's just a tradition for us to go on a day-long hunt on the 28th May," Edward explained. I knew he had picked up on my silent pleas not to tell her any more than that.

"Why?" she asked suspiciously. Persistent and stubborn, I knew she wasn't going to drop the subject. The scents I associated with people being sypathetic were coming at me from all sides, particularly from Rosalie, which might have surprised most people, but she could understand me, at least where this is concerned.

"Just come on the hunt with us," Rosalie insisted.

"OK. Everyone's acting really weird. What's going on?" Amelia's persistance and stubbornness didn't decrease in volume. She turned to me. "Harry? What's going on? What's so special about the 28th May?"

"It's the day the Cullen siblings go on their annual day-long-sibling-only hunt," I answered.

"Why the 28th though?" she asked.

"We just picked a date at random," Emmett said with a shrug. She scanned us all critically - she had now swapped to suspicious - before shrugging herself.

"Cullen sibling hunt it is then," she agreed. The scent of suspiciousness quickly began to decrease, as was Amelia's way. She never stayed any one way for too long, quickly move on to the next thing. "So, what are we doing now?" she asked.

"What's on the TV?" Emmett asked. He moved to sit in front of the TV, and Amelia and Bella followed. The others seemed to converge around me. I knew without asking they wanted to talk.

"Edge of the forest," Alice said. She most have seen my desire to be out of Amelia's hearing range.

Once we were there, all four of them turned to me with sympathetic faces.

"You have to tell her," Edward insisted.

"I know," I admitted glumly.

"You can't move forwards with your relationship until you tell her," Alice informed me. "Trust me, I know."

"She deserves the truth," Rosalie said forcefully. "You know I understand, not as much as Esme does, but still I understand. But you can't hide something like that from someone you love."

"It's not exactly a cheery story," I said darkly.

"But who here does have have a cheery story," Jasper said to me. I had to concede it was a good point.

"How do I tell her though?" I murmured, more to myself than them.

"Have you told her any of it? Sophia? Cecilia?" Jasper asked. "Sorry," he added quickly. He must have felt the stab of grief when he said the last name.

"No," Edward and Alice answered for me.

"How do I tell her all of that though?" I asked again, despairingly. I simply couldn't imagine it.

"I don't know," Rosalie said softly. "You have to though," she added determinedly.

"I know," I agreed reluntantly. "Thanks," I said to them all, knowing they were genuinely only trying to help.

I rushed back into the room, bypassing the main room were the others were watching the TV. I went into my room and stood in front of the picture I had drawn. Drawings of a former life. I wasn't that person anymore. I looked at the pictures as memories blurred together. They were the clearest memories I had from my human years, memories I had clung to with all i had for I couldn't lose them. They were all i had left of the people who I had once loved so much.

Without thinking about what I was doing, I got my sketchpad out and began to draw. This was what I always did when my mind was rattled. The familiar action soothed me. It was only once I'd calmed down that I looked at what had begun to draw. I looked at the woman I had drawn and tried to decide who she was supposed to be. The only distinguishable feature I had given the drawing was wild, brunette curls. That didn't help me decide which one of them it was supposed to be. It was the woman I loved - but which one?

I threw the sketchpad across the room with force. It smashed a hole in the opposite wall. I would have to hide that from Esme. I wasn't going to drag my grief onto her again, not considering what day it was tomorrow.

Two faces blurred into one in my mind. This is what I had been so determined to stop from happening. I had to remember who was who. I couldn't allow them to blur together. Amelia was Amelia - no one else. She had to be something entirely seperate, not a replacement. The brunette curls may have been similar, but nothing else was. I had been so cautious to start of with. So afraid to even consider loving Amelia. Surely it was a betrayal. Betrayal of the three people I had once loved more than anything.

"Harry?" Alice's voice was timid as it drifted through from the other side of the door. I wondered how much of my breakdown she had seen. "We need to go. Carlisle will be home soon."

I walked out the room and followed Alice to where the rest of them were waiting. They were all sympathetic, except Amelia. She was persistent and determined again. I knew she was not going to stop until she knew the truth.

_So why not give it to her?_

I didn't even want to consider that possibility. It just seemed so implausible.

"Come on. We should go," Emmett said. "Time to catch some pairs." We all piled into the two cars.

Amelia and I were in the back of Rosalie's BMW. I knew Amelia still had questions, but she seemed to have decided to leave it for now. She talked with Emmett and Rosalie about trivial things while I stared out the window. Images flashed through my mind. Images from my past, both distant and recent.

I remembered what had happened this very same day three years ago. The day that had sealed my place as one of the Cullen children.

Forks, Washington

_May 2007_

_I threw the meager possessions I had collected in the month I had stayed with the Cullens into the backpack. I couldn't stay here anymore with this sickly sweet 'family'. I heard the Cullen 'children' moving around in the rooms beneath me. Something about a Cullen sibling tradition. That they always hunted on the 28__th__ May or some rubbish like that. I didn't care. I was not their brother. Being a brother to anyone had only ever caused me misery._

_I suppose Alice and Bella seemed likeable enough. Even Rosalie had a decent side beneath her tough exterior. I just didn't want any more sisters. I'd had a family once and look what happened to it._

_I had thrown everything else into the backpack with furious disinterest, but I picked up the last item with care. The only object I had not acquired __over the last month, as it was the only thing I took into the cave with me. An object I'd had from the very beginning of my immortality. Sophia had rescued it from the house for me along with some other family photographs before she had helped to raze our childhood home to the ground._

_I looked at the faces smiling up at me out of the century and a half old photograph. Despite how long we'd had to wait for it to be taken, our smiles had not faltered. Tenderly, my fingers brushed the glass of the frame, stroking each face individually. Three faces I would never see again._

_I fought the temptation to throw the picture against the wall. I couldn't lose it. It was the only photo I had of them. It helped to keep the memories clearer because it showed me what they had looked like._

_I hated this. This re__ignited pain. It was these people. They made it all worse. I would always be thankful to Carlisle Cullen for saving me, for now that __I was in my rational mind once more,__I understood that I could not have gone on like that forever. Something would have given first – either a human would have come past or I would have finally lost my mind (if vampires even could.) But no amount of gratitude was going to make me stay with this 'family' any longer. I scoffed at my own sarcasm. The Cullens really were a family; there was no denying it. That was why it hurt so bad to be around them. They reminded me of what I once had. What I could never have again._

"_Aren't you coming with us?" I heard a voice say from the doorway. As always, __that little girl's voice stung __me. I forced myself to look up. To look at the hybrid child who always reminded me of Victoria. It was the curls that always did me. Renesmee's were a different color, but aside from that they were so alike, down to the chocolate brown eyes that always seemed wide with wonder._

_I shook my head in answer to the girl's question._

"_Come on, sweetheart. We have to go," Edward picked his daughter up. He shot me a worried look. He was sympathetic, __but that only made things worse. Then he disappeared down the stairs._

_Gently, I placed the framed photograph at the top of the backpack and zipped it up. Though I could no longer see her in the picture, Victoria's face still swam in my mind with those curls so like Renesmee's. So like her mother's._

_The Cullen household was now silent. I assumed the others had all left for their traditional __28__th __May hunt._

_With a sigh, I picked up the backpack. I was doing exactly what I'd said I would do. I had stayed with the Cullens until I understood the basics of their vegetarian diet, __and now I was leaving them. So why did a part of me want to stay? Why did some small part of me wish I could have been a part of their family?_

_I laughed darkly to myself at the thought._

_There was no need to leave a note or anything explaining. I was__ sure Edward and Alice already knew. They hadn't even tried to stop me - didn't that just show how much I didn't belong here?_

_I had got to the top of the staircase when a noise made me stop. Apparently, I wasn't the only one left. I took a deep breath to see whose scent it was. I only caught one main trait nearby, loving. It was Esme who was still at home. Her current minor traits were bizarre though. There was maternal and caring, which was fairly standard for her, but also self-doubt and self-pitying._

_I realized the noise I could hear was her sobbing. With a sigh, I put the backpack down. I couldn't leave a sobbing woman alone, particularly not one as kind and sweet as Esme._

"_Mrs. Cullen?" I called as I knocked on her bedroom door. Cautiously, I opened it. She was sat on her bed with a small blue blanket clutched in her hands._

"_Oh, hello, __Harry," she said, trying to make her voice sound normal but unable to avoid giving a small sob._

"_Mrs. Cullen, are you alright?" Even as I said the words, __I realized how stupid a question that was._

"_Fine," she clearly lied. I tried to guess what was wrong with her. Going off the personality traits currently strongest in her scent, __I would have guessed something had happened to one of her children, but what? They had all seemed fine a while ago._

"_Is everyone OK?" She nodded. I didn't know what else to say, __but I couldn't just leave her when she was so visibly upset._

"_What's that?" I asked, indicting the blanket in her hands._

"_Do you know how I became a vampire?" she asked. I shook my head, wondering where on Earth she was going with this. "Carlisle found me in a morgue, after I'd jumped off a cliff."_

"_Why?" I asked without thinking. She held up the blanket in her hand._

"_My son died."_

"_I'm sorry," I muttered, at a loss at what else to say. _

"_You probably think I'm stupid. Crying over something that happened eighty-__six years ago."_

"_No. No, I don't think you're stupid."_

"_It's just Nessie. Having a child around. I'm so glad she's __here - such a little blessing. I never thought I would ever have children again after what happened to William. I'm so blessed, with my husband, and my children, and my granddaughter. So why am I sitting here dry sobbing into a blanket?"_

"Because something like that never goes away completely," I told her. "Losing a child. No matter what happens. You love them unconditionally, even after they're dead. You wonder what they would have grown up to be. Would they have been like you?" I shook my head. "You never can forget them. Never. So no, I don't think you're stupid. The very opposite in fact. You've moved on with your life, but you haven't forgotten your son. You haven't clung to a life that's now over, but accepted it and grieved for it, and then moved on." Esme was looking at me, her eyes widening with realization. I began to sense sympathy coming of her as well.

"_What happened?" she asked me. A part of me wanted to spill everything out to this kind heartened woman, but I couldn't do it._

"_It's a long story," I said bitterly._

"_I've got time. Carlisle should have been home by now, but surgery's running late. Not his fault, of course. I know he hates the idea that he had been forced to leave me alone today of all days." Suddenly, I realized exactly what the traditional 28__th__May hunt was about. To give their mother some privacy as she mourned what I could only presume was the anniversary of her son's death._

_I shook my head at her. "I'd rather not talk about it."_

"_OK. But if you do decide you'd like someone to talk to, __you know where to find me. It's nice to know that you're not the only one. Thank you for that, by the way." I was only half listening to her words. I was thinking about how she'd turned her life around. She hadn't allowed what she'd lost to prevent her from enjoying her new life. From loving a new family. _

"_You're welcome, Mom." The last word slipped out unbidden. She looked at me in shock. Where had that come from? I had been so determined that I would not allow the Cullens to become my family. But maybe that was exactly what I needed. To allow myself to attempt to enjoy this life. To let people in again. To have a family again._

_One thing was certain; I didn't feel like leaving anymore. In fact, the idea horrified me. The thought of being alone with nothing to think about but the past. I had done that for the last decade in the cave; I had to stop torturing myself._

_Esme's phone rang. I gathered from the conversation that Carlisle would be home soon. I walked toward the door._

"_My son died of a lung infection," she told me as I was leaving. I knew she was hoping to get more information from me._

"_My family were murdered," I replied, and then I left her room. I knew I shouldn't have said that. I would have to explain everything soon – that was if Edward hadn't already told everyone anyway._

I picked up my backpack from where I had abandoned it at the top of the stairs and went back to my room. I wasn't leaving now.

* * *

**Apologies again for the delay, more Beta issues. Hopefully, everything is all sorted out now.**

**So a (rather big) part of Harry's past has been revealed there. I'd love to hear your thoughts :)**


	13. Celebration Marred By Ghosts of the Past

**13. Celebrations Marred by Ghosts of the Past**

Astoria, Oregon

June 2010

_Harry_

Emmett's name was called first, and then mine.

"Harry Cullen." I followed my brother onto the stage and collected the high school diploma from the fake-smiling principal, who relunctantly shook my hand. I heard a small cheer and knew it had to have come from Amelia. I had been most surprised when I had first smelled her scent in the high school. Suddenly, her determination to build self-control made a lot more sense. I was extremely touched by her effort, remembering my own newborn struggles with bloodlust all too well. Though, of couse, Amelia's situation and mine were very different.

I turned the diploma over in my hand. I knew this meant nothing to my siblings – they had been through the American education system more times than I cared to imagined – but to me it was an achievement. I hadn't attended school since I was human, let alone graduated.

Once Rosalie and Jasper had received their diplomas as well, we went over to meet our family.

Amelia came rushing over, at a pace that could just about pass as human. With a squeal, she threw herself into my arms. Slightly thrown by her public display of affection, I was a little slow to react.

"Well done," Amelia said with a smile, taking a step back and looking slightly embarassed. She looked so adorable that I had to resist the urge to pull her into my arms once more, despite the public setting.

"You did it, honey."

"_You did it, honey," _a different voice said in my head.

I turned to look at Amelia, trying to stay in the present. I tried to look into the honey-colored eyes she was so proud of, and realized in horror they were now a deep dark blue.

"Like oceans, you always said," Amelia said. Her curls were now much longer, down her back. Her oval face had become a heartshape. She was still pale, but 'English Rose' pale, not vampire pale. She was dressed in the clothes of my era. She wasn't Amelia anymore.

Somewhere in the back of my mind, I registered that this wasn't right. I had to be seeing things, but in this one moment I didn't care.

"I'm glad to see you so happy," Cecilia said. "You deserve it. All these years. All these centuries you've hated yourself because of what happened. You deserve a second chance. Amelia seems nice."

My throat had closed up. I had so much I wanted to say, but I couldn't say any of it.

"You did it, honey," she repeated. "I remember that night. You'd been so preoccupied with helping your father organize his plans for his town. You came rushing into our bedroom to tell me the plans were finished, and I told you I was with child again - what would have been our third child." She smiled sadly. "Stop mourning for me, Harry. I loved you. I _love_ you. But I'm dead. And you have to move on. Amelia and I are very different people. She's not a replacement, she's your soul mate. That's how it works for ... for what you are now." She looked sideways. "I have to go now. The mind reader's looking at you funny, but don't be afraid to love again." Her face was thoughtful for a second. "And forgive Sophia." She was fading now, disappearing from my life once more. "Victoria and Albert say 'Hello, Daddy.'"

"Harry?" Amelia's voice was frantic. Her eyes were gold once more. "Harry?" she repeated. "What the hell just happened? Are you OK?"

"Fine," I murmured. My mind was still reeling. What had just happened?

_A decade in a cave and I decide to lose my mind now._

"Er... no, you're not," Amelia told me forcefully. She was currently emitting persistant and stubborn once more. The rest of my family's personalities were as normal, except Edward, who was sympathetic. He had heard it all.

"We should go home," Carlisle announced into the unusually tense atmosphere. They may not have known what I had just seen, but it was obvious the rest of my family knew something was wrong.

We all began to walk. Amelia's eyes never left me. Somehow, Edward managed to make it so it was just me and him in a car.

"Don't," I ordered sternly as soon as he sat down. "I don't want to hear it."

"You really need to talk to Amelia," he said.

"Why? So she can think she's just Cecilia's replacement," I said bitterly. For despite it never being my intentions, surely that was how she'd see it if she knew. "She's not. I'm not trying to replace her," I said frantically. I was aware I sounded like I was trying to force myself to believe my own words. I thrust my head into my hands in frustration, sighing heavily.

"Clearly things aren't OK as they are," Edward said to me, not unkindly.

"Things were fine until everyone started trying to get involved and mentioned Cecilia."

"Don't blame us. You couldn't have hid from this forever. Cecilia - and Victoria and Albert - are a part of who you are."

"Can you leave the pyscho-analysing to me, please? I'm fine," I said forcefully.

"You just envisioned your dead wife speaking to you," Edward said gently.

I shook my head. "What happened in there?" I asked. "Amelia just became Cecilia. I always wanted them to be separate. They're separate people from separate lives."

"How can you claim your human life as separate when you've clung to it so hard?" We were pulling up outside the house now.

"Can't a man lose his own mind without everyone getting involved nowadays?" I muttered.

"You're not losing your mind. Trust me, I've seen inside the minds of the truly insane before."

"Then how do you explain what just happened?" I asked desperatedly. I needed some answers.

"You lost somebody – somebodies – you love and now you're moving on and it feels like a betrayal. You want to think Cecilia would accept that fact. That's why your version of her told you to move on. You were trying to give yourself permission."

"Would the real Cecilia have said that?" I asked.

Edward's brow furrowed. "I don't know. I never knew her, remember? Only you can answer that." He got out of the car and, relunctantly, I followed him.

The others had made it home before us. Amelia met me at the doorway.

"We need to talk," she said softly.

"Uh-oh," I forced myself to joke. Trying to act normal. "No good has ever followed that sentence." Amelia rolled her eyes at me and then linked her hand into mine.

Running together, she lead me to the clearing we had spoke together in just under two months ago, where I had first told her anything about my human life.

"What's going on with you? You've been acting weird ever since the annual sibling hunt thing." She was being loving and concerning, and I knew her heart was in the right place.

I closed my eyes gently, sighing. Distractedly, I ran my fingers through my hair. I could feel Amelia's eyes on me.

_Where to begin? What to say to her?_

I knew I had to. There could be no more hiding from this anymore. I felt the gentle pressure of Amelia's hand squeezing mine comfortingly.

It began to rain.

Without opening my eyes, I began to speak. "Amelia, I… I need to tell you something." The words were spoken so quietly I'd be surprised if she heard them, vampire hearing or not.

"What?" Her own voice was barely louder than mine.

"I…when I was a…there was…" I trailed off. Unable to speak the words I was thinking.

_When I was a human there was a woman I loved more than anything._

I heard Amelia gasp as a flash of light caused me to open my eyes. A few seconds later, the thunder followed it.

"We should go home," I suggested gently, relieved by the distraction.

"No," Amelia shook her head vigorously, causing her now soaking wet hair to fly out around her.

"We can talk at home," I promised. I knew exactly what I was doing. I was stalling. She looked at me critically for a moment before agreeing.

I escaped to my room once we arrived back home, much to Amelia's obvious chargin. I knew I had promised her an explantation, but I simply couldn't do it.

Changing out of my wet clothes, I went downstairs to join the rest of my family - hoping Amelia wouldn't bring anything up in front of them.

I tried to ignore them and their scents; I didn't need nor want their opinions on the matter.

A part of me knew I was being stupid, that I could procastinate all I wanted, but I still had to tell her eventually if I wanted Amelia and I to work as a couple. And I did. I truly did.

I just couldn't tell her today.

"Harry-" Edward began.

"Don't. Just don't," I ordered.

"Don't what?" Amelia asked, choosing exactly the wrong moment to walk down the stairs.

"Nothing," I said quickly.

"Oh, not this again," she snapped.

"What can I say, Amelia? Some people are just cowards," Rosalie said snarkily. Before I could stop myself, I growled warningly at her. Whatever her reasons - for I could tell in her own twisted way she was trying to help - I was not in the mood for this.

"Oh Rosalie, will you just shut up," Amelia snapped on my behalf. "This doesn't involve you."

"I think it does," Rosalie retorted.

"Oh, just shut up!" Amelia shouted. The weirdest thing happened then: for just a second Rosalie's scent disappeared from the room.

"What the hell was that?" Three different voices asked.

"Erm... Rosalie? Can you try to talk?" Alice said uncertainly. Rosalie opened her mouth to speak and no words came out.

"What the fuck did I just do?" Amelia shouted. She was backing away from Rosalie, panicked. Her hands were over her mouth in shock, and she was looking around with wild startled eyes. Her eyes finally settled on Edward.

"I have no idea," Edward replied.

"Did you feel that?" she whispered in shock. She was staring at Rosalie again, who was making wild hand gestures. She opened and closed her mouth uselessly.

"Yes," Edward replied.

"Her feelings disappered for a second," Jasper asked.

"Her personalities too," I added.

"What the fuck is going on?" Emmett asked furiously. He was trying to comfort his irate wife. I noticed his body was placed to put himself between Rosalie and Amelia, even though whatever Amelia had done, she certainly hadn't physically done it.

All of us were staring at Amelia. She had backed herself against the wall, afraid. Carefully, I made my way over to her.

"What just happened?" she muttered. Gently, I wrapped her into my embrace.

"I don't know, dear," I told her truthfully.

* * *

**Reviews are greatly appreciated :)**


	14. Explanations

Denali, Alaska

July 2010

_Amelia_

The car was slowing down. I was staring out the window so I easily spotted the large cabin ahead of us. It was nice to see something other than endless trees, which had grown boring after a while. Still, the view out the window was preferable to having to pretend to be interested in any of the conversations going on in the car. Harry sat next to me, and I was still furious with him because he was hiding something from me. Everyone seemed to know except me. I'd tried, repeatedly, to get him to open up to me, but nothing. Finally, I'd lost my temper and things between us had been cold ever since. It hurt me, not just because I was upset with him, but because I knew whatever it was he wasn't telling me was hurting him.

Five vampires arrived outside to greet us as our two cars pulled up.

"We'll just say hi to the cousins first before we go take our stuff to our home here," Carlisle said from up front. I had a feeling 'saying hi' was going to take a while. After all, the whole reason for this trip to Alaska was to find out what the hell I had done to Rosalie, who was still unable to speak. She hadn't spoken to me since, well, she hadn't spoken to anyone technically, but she was pointedly ignoring me. And her usually cheery husband wasn't exactly being friendly towards me either.

As I got out of the car, the five vampires looked at me with great interest. One of them seemed the most fascinated. I had to assume this was the one the Cullens had told me about, the one who could tell others talents. Eleazar.

"What is she?" he asked.

"We were kind of hoping you could answer that for us," Carlisle replied.

"She has a talent, but there's something else. That… thing," he said the word uncertainly, "you mentioned on the phone?"

"Can you really drink human drinks?" one of the females asked. I nodded in response.

"Yep. Do I have to do the freak show again?" I asked exasperatedly. As much as I appreciated my extraordinary ability, it sure got tiring to be constantly treated like a freak of nature.

"To be honest, I'd be more intrigued to see you manipulate someone's mind," Eleazar said. We all looked at him in shock.

"Do what now?" I asked. _Is that what I do? Manipulate minds?_

"You're here to find out what your talent is. You can manipulate minds." I was still just staring at him in shock.

"What exactly does that mean?" Harry asked on my behalf. Everyone turned their attention to him, giving me a chance to process what I had just been told.

_I can control minds._

"How?" I asked. "I don't know how I did what I did and I can't seem to reverse it."

"You said it usually happens when you lose your temper?" Carlisle asked.

"Yes, but it's only happened twice. And the first time, with Esme, it didn't work. It gave us both a weird headache but I didn't … manipulate her mind," I said the last part uncertainly; the concept sounded so strange.

"That suggests there's some sort of natural shield around people's minds that your mind waves have to penetrate," Eleazar explained.

"So how did I get past Rosalie's shield?" I asked. This wasn't making any sense. I looked over at Rosalie; despite her inability to speak, I knew she was absolutely furious at me. Not that I could blame her, all things considered.

"Shields aren't permanent things, Amelia. Just ask Bella," Elezear told me softly.

"Have you tried simply telling Rosalie to speak again?"

"Yes," I snapped. I wasn't that stupid.

"Rosalie, perhaps you should try and let Amelia in," Carlisle suggested, and Rosalie glared at me.

There was a few seconds of silence and then.

_Like I'm going to allow the stupid freak back inside my mind._

"Oh, so I'm a stupid freak, am I?" I snapped at her.

"She didn't say anything," Emmett replied to me harshly. "She can't speak remember, because of you."

_O f course I didn't say anything. Because of you, you stupid bitch._

"Oh that's just uncalled for!" I shouted.

"What?" several voices chorused.

"She called me a stupid bitch!"

"No, she didn't," Harry told me gently. But the list of insults continued. _How can none of them hear that?_

"I can," Edward told me. "She didn't say anything out loud though."

"Come again?" I questioned. Several people gasped.

"You're reading her thoughts," Alice exclaimed.

"Her shield must be down then," Eleazar noted.

"But how can her shield be down? She was thinking about making sure it stayed up, not trying to take it down."

"Indeed," Edward agreed.

"Does it matter? Will you just give my wife her voice back, please?" Emmett requested testily.

_Speak,_ I tried to think at Rosalie. _Talk. Say something. Speak again. _I could still hear her thoughts, but there was no surge of brain waves or whatever that funny feeling apparently was.

"I can't seem to do it," I exclaimed, irritated.

"Concentrate," Carlisle suggested gently.

_Speak. Talk. Say something. Speak, Rosalie._

"It's not working!" I cried in frustration.

"Try saying it out loud as well," Harry suggested.

"Talk, Rosalie." Nothing. I took a deep breath, trying to focus all of my vampire concentration. "Talk again, Rosalie." This time my voice took on a strange, persuasive tone, and a now recognizable force pulsed through my mind to hers.

"Spare us the rant, please, Rosalie," Alice said before Rosalie could even speak.

"I can speak?" she said. I gave an excited squeal.

"It worked?" I exclaimed happily. "And I'm sorry about the whole, you know, taking your voice away thing. Would you believe me if I said I didn't do it on purpose?" Rosalie glared at me for a second before her face softened slightly.

"I suppose so," she agreed reluctantly. I was relieved that gaining her voice back had appeared to soothe Rosalie's frustration. Hopefully, relations between me and her and Emmett would improve again soon.

"Can you hear my thoughts still?" she asked uncomfortably.

"No," I said. "These shields are tricky things."

"I don't understand why Rosalie refusing to give Amelia access to her mind, did just that," Edward stated.

"That was odd," I agreed. "I mean, how do I get past the shields?"

"This is just a guess," Eleazar began cautiously, "but from what I've been told, and what I'm reading off you, it suggests that you can access people's mind if they're -what's the best way of wording this- being… malicious or … evil. So Rosalie's mind opened because she was trying to keep you out."

"That's so confusing," I complained. "But that does explain why I couldn't get past Esme's shield. She doesn't have an evil or malicious bone in her body."

"Um…thanks," Esme said.

"It's true," everyone in the room chimed in, causing her to smile bashfully.

"What does that say about me?" Rosalie snapped, and everyone looked away from her awkwardly. "Thanks, guys," she said sarcastically.

"You're welcome, Rose," Alice joked.

"So what else can I do?" I asked excitedly.

"Well, here, there's very little you can do, as I presume you can't get past anyone's shield ," Eleazar told me.

"Damn you all, being good people," I said jokingly.

"However, I think it might be possible for people to allow you in," he continued.

"You mean actually allow me in? Or try not to, therefore allowing me in?" I asked.

"Either would work, I think."

"Any volunteers?" I asked, looking around at everyone. "Well, don't all rush at once."

"I will," the other male Denali said. Garrett, I think his name was.

And suddenly I could hear him.

_Can you hear me?_

_Yes. _I was surprised when I managed to reply. I could communicate with other people via their mind. That was kind of awesome to be quite honest.

_Make me do something then._

_Like what?_

_I dunno. Jump up and down?_

_Jump up and down_. The brain waves pulsed from me to him and suddenly he was jumping up and down, much to the amusement of everyone else around us. It was so much easier when someone let me into their mind.

_Stop. _Instantly, he stopped. There was complete silence for a few seconds.

"Oh my God, that is so fucking awesome," Emmett exclaimed. "What else can you do?"

"I think, as along as she can access someone's mind, she can do whatever she wants to them," Eleazar explained. I was still trying to process that. I could control people. I could take total control of them.

Suddenly, all my excitement drained away. I had accidentally taken Rosalie's voice away from her simply by losing my temper. What else would I end up doing to my family? Obviously, their shields wouldn't always protect them. Would I hurt them? Was I a risk to them? Why on Earth would they want me around if there was a chance I could harm them?

It was only truly beginning to impact on me how powerful I truly was.

The thought terrified me.

"I need a minute," I managed to say. Not caring what it looked like, I ran out of the room as quickly as possible. I hesitated for a second by the front door, before opening and fleeing the house.

Somewhere in the back of my mind, I realized this was a strange paradox, but I simply didn't care. Once more, I ran from my family.

~o~ ~O~ ~o~

"Why are you sitting in a tree?" a voice shouted. I recognized the bell-like peal of Nessie's voice. She and Jacob had come along with us to Alaska, while Seth had returned home to La Push to spend time with his family.

"I don't know," I answered truthfully. Silently, she clambered up the tree to join me. After all the preparation I had done to be able to attend Harry's graduation, it was no longer any effort to ignore her scent. Being around humans I still struggled with, but one little hybrid I could cope with.

Gently, she pressed her palm to my cheek. I saw my own shocked face just before I fled the house. She was obviously asking me what was wrong.

"I'm fine," I lied.

"I may still technically be a child, but even I'm not that naïve."

I sighed." I just don't want to talk about it," I told her, perhaps a little harshly.

"Did my family ever tell you what happened with the Volturi?" she asked gently.

"That's that bunch of Italian psychos nobody likes, right?"

"That's one way of describing them, yes. Shortly after I was born, the Volturi found out about my existence, but they were told I was an immortal child, something strictly forbidden by their laws. So they, along with their guard, came to kill us all." She paused then. As fascinating as what she was telling me was, I couldn't see how it was relevant to what had just been discovered about me.

"Anyway, we gathered a collection of friends for support, to give evidence that I was a hybrid, not an immortal, but at the end of the day, when they finally came, it was Mom that saved us."

"Because of her shield." I remembered Edward and Bella telling me about it a while ago, but I had been too preoccupied with trying to understand their so-called 'love story'.

"And we've always feared the Volturi will return," Edward's voice sounded from below me. He and Bella came to join us in the tree.

"I see Nessie found you," Bella said softly. "You certainly ran a long way."

"It wasn't that far," I defended.

"Amelia, you do realize we crossed the Alaskan-Canadian border a while ago," Edward told me.

"Oh. Oops. Sorry, I didn't mean to worry everyone."

"Well, you did, lil' sis." This time I recognized Emmett's booming voice. Soon he and Rosalie were in the tree as well, on the branches above us.

"Erm… how many vampires do you think one tree can hold?" I asked cautiously.

"Technically, I'm a hybrid," Nessie reminded me. Below us, a wolf howled.

"Jacob's here," Nessie squealed.

"Yes, we found her," Edward called down to the large wolf. "He's going to go phase back," he told us.

"How many people were looking for me?" I asked hesitantly.

"All of us," Emmett replied.

"That was really unnecessary," I told them forcefully.

"When are you going to realise your own importance to us?" This came unexpectedly from Rosalie.

"I thought you'd still be angry at me for the whole 'shutting up' incident," I said to her without thinking about it. I never did learn to keep my mouth shut.

"Oh, I am," she replied in a mock-threatening way.

The branches of the tree next to us began to shake, and suddenly Jacob's head appeared from within its leaves.

"Smooth, mutt," Emmett joked.

"Where's Harry?" I asked. His absence from this bizarre gathering of our family had suddenly hit me.

"Probably still looking for you," Edward replied.

"Nope, we found her!" Alice chimed below us. She and Jasper were here now, and I realized Harry was with them; I didn't know whether to be pleased about that or not.

"Alice, how were you not the first person to find me?"

"Hybrid and werewolf involvement," she grumbled. Two voices shouted apologies.

"How did you find me first, anyway?" I asked Nessie.

She shrugged. "Luck, I guess."

The three newest arrivals had joined us in the treetops, clambering up the tree just a little behind us, between us and Jacob.

"Why is everyone up trees?" Jasper asked.

"Ask Amelia," Emmett answered. Everyone turned their attention to me.

"I dunno," I replied with a sigh. "I just wanted somewhere to hide," I admitted.

"Why?" This was asked by Esme, who, along with Carlisle, had joined Alice, Jasper, and Harry opposite us.

"Why are we holding a Cullen family meeting up in the trees?" I asked, purposefully changing topic.

"Because you were hiding up one," several voices chorused. _Damn, walked straight into that one._

"Are you upset by your talent, Amelia?" Carlisle asked gently. I didn't reply, though I knew the answer. Yes. Yes, I was. It was just the idea that I could control people… could I trust myself with that sort of power?

"Absolute power corrupts absolutely," I quoted out loud.

"But it's not absolute; you have to get past people's shields," Emmett pointed out.

"And to do so, they have to be thinking something malicious," Edward reminded me. "For example, do you think you could mind manipulate any of us right now?"

I tried to gain access to their minds, but it didn't work. Now I knew what I could do, I could, if I concentrated, feel the pulse of the brain waves, but they were closed off, inaccessible to me.

"No," I replied.

"Is it really such a bad thing to be able to stop people from being able to hurt each other?" Bella asked.

"I suppose not," I admitted.

"You know I believe that a person's talent occurs because they bring something over with them from their human life," Carlisle told me. "For example, Edward could read people as a human and Jasper was charismatic. Both Alice and Bella's talent were there as humans, and amplified by the change."

"I'm pretty certain I couldn't control people as a human," I replied, more sarcastically than I had intended.

_No-one would ever have thrown me down a flight of a stairs if I could. _In fact, most of the time I had felt powerless going through high school, watching all the bullying and other shit that happened there, and knowing there was nothing I could do to change things. That's just the way people are, and there was nothing I could do about it. And it wasn't just high school. After all, turn the news on any day and you're bound to find at least one story about someone who has murdered, or raped, or stole, or lied.

"Perhaps that's where it came from then," Edward said. I looked at him, confused. "That desire to be able to do something. To want to change things. Now you can."

"Oh," was all I could say in reply. But I could see his point, perhaps there was a good side to all this.

"Do you remember what Nessie was telling you earlier?" Edward asked.

"Something about the Italian psychos trying to attack you all?"

Emmett snorted. "'Italian psychos', like it, lil' sis." I felt myself smile slightly, while everyone else playfully glared at him.

"One day," Bella said softly. "We all fear their return. And they know about my shield now; they'll find a way round it. But they can't make themselves good, and that's the only defence anyone could have against you."

"I can use this… _thing_ to help keep them away?"

"It's a gift, not a curse, Amelia." I was surprised when Harry spoke for the first time.

"I think we should be heading back," Esme announced. Everyone started to leave when I heard Harry's voice.

_Can we stay here? There's something I need to tell you._

I was shocked to realize it was his thoughts I could hear. He had let me into his mind.

_Of course._

"I think I want to stay here a short while," I announced.

"I'll stay with you," Harry quickly added. The rest of our family quickly departed and Harry jumped across so he was sat next to me. But neither of us said anything. A short distance away we heard our family greet the Denali coven, telling them I'd been found.

"Wow, everyone really was looking for me," I murmured.

"You scared us," Harry said softly.

"Sorry," I muttered. "I didn't mean to worry anyone. It's just… I get worried. Begin to feel like I don't belong. Or with this, just so scared I was going to lose control and do something horrible to you all."

"But you won't. I'm sure you're sick of hearing this by now, but I'll repeat it once more. You are the nicest person I've ever met-"

"Yes, I'm so nice that you will barely speak to me," I spat out sarcastically. "I've managed to piss off pretty much everybody at one point or another, and let's not forget I tried to kill a little girl. And while we're on about things we can't forget, let's just remember… you say I'm so nice and special, that I'm worth something. What am I worth? My life is –was- so worthless it could be thrown away for the amusement of some bored drunks. Bored drunks, for the record, who were supposed to care about me. So excuse me if I don't believe you." I was crying by the end of my rant, because it was all true. My life was worthless, and I didn't know why anyone bothered to care anymore. I suppose they'd learn soon enough.

Carefully, Harry moved closer, taking both my hands in his and squeezing them comfortingly.

"You can't judge everybody on what… _they _did to you, or yourself, for that matter. If you're not worth anything then why did our entire family come looking for you? You have to believe me, Amelia, you are not worthless. I understand why you struggle with it; after all, you were changed in that state of mind." He paused then, as I allowed what he had to said to sInk in. Was it really all just in my head, a by product of what happened? Hadn't I been the one to say everything in life happened for a reason? And that you shouldn't concentrate too much on the past? Suddenly, and inexplicably, I began to laugh.

"Amelia? Are you OK?" Harry questioned cautiously.

"I really suck at taking my own advice," I said between giggles.

"Erm…" was all Harry could say in reply to that.

"Sorry, I don't blame you for being confused. I'm so all over the place. Learning I can apparently manipulate people hasn't helped. Do you really think I can use it for good?"

"I think the reason that particular talent chose to manifest itself in you, is because you _want_ to use it for good."

"One annoying sister at a time," I added sarcastically in reference to what had happened to Rosalie.

"Amelia, since you became a vampire you've seen very little of the world outside our family. There will be a time, at some point in the nearby future, where you will be thankful you could change the course of things."

"Perhaps," I agreed reluctantly. "Is that all you wanted to tell me? You've given me my pep talk, shall we go home now?" It came out more snappy than I had intended, but I had just realised that this was the first proper conversation we'd had since his graduation.

"No," Harry replied softly. "I have something else I need to tell you. Something I've been holding back from telling you for a long time, because I've been scared how you might react. What you might think about me, and about us, once you know." He sighed as I waited patiently for him to continue, clearly whatever this was, it was a delicate topic for him.

"I've been postponing this conversation for so long. Yet when you ran away again, I worried that you might run too far, that something might happen to you, that I might never see you again, and I realized that I have to tell you. For us to ever have a chance at being together properly, I have to tell you."

"So what it is?" I whispered.

_I want to be truly honest with you. Let me show you…_

**Reviews are greatly appreciated :)**


	15. My Past I Can't Escape

**What's this? An update? I'll bypass the excuses and move straight to the apology. I'm sorry – I left this chapter much longer than I intended too.**

**Since it's been awhile, the last chapter ended with Amelia discovering her talent and Harry deciding to tell her the truth about his past.**

* * *

1848

Southern England

_Harry_

As I entered my bedroom, I found Cecilia laying on the bed, resting. Her eyes flickered open at the sound of the door opening and closing, though I'd tried my best to be quiet.

"I didn't mean to disturb you, dear," I whispered. She smiled softly at me.

"It's fine." She paused uncomfortably for a moment, her gaze flickered down to our bed coverings which she was playing with absentmindedly. "Any news on Sophia?" she finally asked. Her voice was barely above a whisper – I could see how much it pained her to ask. No doubt because she knew how much it pained me to answer.

I shook my head. "No," I whispered back. My mouth only just managed to form the words. Despite my best efforts at disguising it, my grief was still clear to be heard.

There had been no news on my twin sister since the day she had disappeared over two weeks ago. She had been on her way back from the local Lord's house, for she had recently started to court his son. Not a bad match for an industrialist's daughter, as people were constantly reminding her. I should have known Sophia would have her sights set on the best, not from ambition, but from sheer optimism. She would already have been imagining herself as a happily married Lady, her imagination glossing over anything that wasn't picture perfect, such as the very common rumour that the Lord's family were fast running out of money. An industrialist's money in exchange for a titled daughter, it was becoming a more and more common exchange nowadays. But I just knew that in my sister's mind that Lord John loved her. Maybe she was right and I was just a cynic, yet I doubted that. I had always considered myself a good judge of character, and, aside from my own wife, I knew no one quite as well as my loveable, optimistic, but naïve and slightly dippy twin sister.

I sat down on the bed beside my wife, kissing her gently on the cheek. She stroked my arm in an attempt to offer comfort.

If my sister had been heading towards a marriage of convenience (at least from the groom's point of view), then I knew without a doubt that I married for love. I had been just fifteen when I first met Cecilia. Both our families had been down in London during the Season (though my family had actually been there for my older sister, not me.) I had found my attention captured by this sweet, gentle girl when I had first met her. Going over to speak to her had been the most terrifying thing I had ever done, but somehow I had found the nerve. Practically stammering, I had introduced myself, and she had smiled shyly, and somehow I had found my nerves slowly disappearing as we talked comfortably. With a lot of interfering from Mama (who had noticed us), her family was invited over for dinner at ours the week after next. Where, much to my surprise, her father had given me permission to court her (again, I suspected Mama was behind that as well.) The next year, at sixteen, we had married, with our parents' permission. I had thought that I would never again be as happy as I was that day, but this had been disproved first a year later, and then the year after that, when she had bore me first a daughter, and then a son.

"I should go check on Victoria and Albert," Cecilia said softly. She smiled slightly at their names as always.

"I still blame my father for the names," I joked. There was no denying my monarchist father had been the main influence behind naming our children after the Queen and her Prince Consort.

"I do, too," Cecilia joked back with a soft laugh. After she had left, I allowed myself to once more think about my twin's disappearance. I had accompanied my father to the morgue where they had taken the bodies that had been found near the crashed carriage. Thankfully, none of them had been Sophia's, but I could still clearly remember John's corpse. His neck had the most disgusting wound I had ever seen, it looked as if he had been attacked by an animal. It was an horrific image I would never forget for as long as I lived. I couldn't help but wonder if Sophia's mangled body was out there somewhere, as morbid as the thought was. For what other explanation was there for her disappearance, given the circumstances?

"Sophia?" I heard my wife shout my sister's name. I was out of my seat like a shot, but my joy only lasted a few seconds. I hadn't even made it to door when I heard a bloodcurdling scream.

Hastily, I raced along the corridor as fast as I could. My heart was beating frantically in my chest, my breaths were short and shallow. I willed myself to run faster though I was already going at my full speed. Something was wrong; terribly wrong. All I could hear was my wife's scream in my head, fearful and frantic. Or the way she had called Sophia's name. I had not comprehended it in my excitement, but Cecilia's voice hadn't been relieved and joyful, as I would expect. It had been confused yet scared, as if she hadn't been certain who it was.

It was eerily silent as I came to a stop outside the nursery. There was a few distant noises; a few shouts and a sobbing sound that almost reminded me of Sophia when she cried, but no noise emitted from the inside of the room. No cry from Albert. No uncomfortable shuffling from Victoria, as she did when she couldn't sleep. Cecilia's quiet voice wasn't comforting them.

A ripple of adrenaline passed through me. My skin tingled uncomfortably and I was well aware of my still thumping heart. I was on edge. Something strange was happening. Something not right.

Hesitantly I turned the handle of the nursery door and opened it with caution.

I felt my knees collapse from underneath me and heard the strangled cry that left my lips, but I wasn't heeding them any attention. My entire focus was on the sight in front of me. To horrific to even look at, yet so tragic I couldn't seem to tear my eyes away.

Cecelia's dark brown eyes stared back at me, but they were cold and lifeless. Her head lay limply to the side. I tried not to look at her neck, but there was no avoiding it. It looked like it had been ripped out by an animal. Lord John's corpse suddenly flashed into my mind. His neck had been shred in much the same way, but, in comparison, his injury had been neater. Tidier. The wound on Cecilia's neck looked savage.

"Cecilia?" I managed to whisper frantically, clambering closer on shaky knees. "Cecilia?" I repeated desperately. There was no reply. Her body didn't move. She didn't stand up and laugh her merry little giggle.

"Cecilia?" I didn't know what I had expected to happen, but I had to try, because I couldn't accept this. I purely couldn't. She couldn't be…

"Cecilia!" Now by her side, I gently pushed her hair out of her face. Her usually gentle features were contorted in pain. I didn't want to think about why that was, yet I couldn't stop myself from staring at her neck in disgusted, horrified fascination. Somewhere in the back of my mind, connections were being made. Cecilia's neck. Lord John's neck. My twin sister's disappearance. Cecilia shouting Sophia's name. I knew they were connected, but I couldn't figure out why. Not in my current state of mind.

Suddenly, it dawned on me that it was still too silent in the nursery. With trepidation, I walked over to Victoria's bedside. Blotches of red stained the white bedding. I could see her outline under the sheet, but it was pulled up over her head, to cover her entire body. She didn't move.

I didn't want to move the sheet, but I had no choice. I had to know for certain. With shaking hands I slowly peeled the sheet backwards. Her eyes were closed. Her chocolate curls tumbled onto the pillows. She looked like she did every night when she was asleep, and I tried to tell myself that was all it was. That she was just asleep. But instinct told me she wasn't, as much as I would have liked to believe her to be. I stopped as soon as I saw the red at the top of her neck, letting the sheet fall back over her delicate, sleeping features.

I didn't stop to think about the implications. Of what had happened to her or her mother. I couldn't cope with it. Instead, I moved numbly to Albert's crib, almost certain what I would find there but still hoping against hope for a different outcome. His face had been covered up just like Victoria's, as if their murderer had wanted to cover up their crime. I moved the blanket quickly this time, I just needed to know – one way or another. The wound was on not just his neck, but covering his left shoulder as well. As I stared incomprehensibly at it -trying to work out who would do such a thing and how, and yet still not even beginning to comprehend what it truly meant for me and my family- another shrill scream sounded through the house. It stopped suddenly, as if someone had cut her off. But I was still able to recognize it – Mama. Suddenly, I became aware of the sounds in the rest of the house, which I had been tuning out in my shock as I made gruesome discovery after gruesome discovery. There was shouts and screams, and I thought I heard someone laughing. It was a cruel, sadistic laugh that made the hair's on the back of my neck stick up.

Loath though I was to leave my wife and children, I realized I had to go and try to save the rest of my family. I had only moved a few steps when I heard footsteps running towards me, much faster than I had ever heard anyone run before. I began to move quicker, powered by rage and grief, determined to catch the bastard. I had no plan, no idea what I would do when I confronted him, I just wanted to hunt him down.

The door flung open just as I reached it, sending me flying backwards across the room. I opened my eyes in time to get a glimpse of her as she attacked me. Sophia. So changed and yet still recognizable. Her eyes were a demonic red and her face was twisted into a gruesome snarl. She looked possessed, inhuman. By the time I had processed all this she was already upon me. I felt a sharp stabbing pain in my neck as she ravaged it, and I realized this monster who looked like my sister was the one who had killed my wife and my children.

"Sophia, it's me. It's Harry." I managed to stutter my pleas out in a desperate attempt to save my own life. But I knew it wouldn't work, I could feel my life drifting away, my eyes were closing despite my best attempts to keep them open, and I numbly recognized my beloved twin sister was murdering me. I couldn't even figure out how. All I knew was that she was and that it hurt. It hurt unlike anything else I'd ever experienced.

"Cecilia?" I whispered. I felt around clumsily for my wife's hand, even though I had no idea if I was beside her or not. I felt almost peaceful, as my consciousness began to fade and the pain began to lessen with it. I realized that at least we had all died together. At least we would be together in Heaven. In a way, I was actually relived – I wouldn't have to live my life without her. We could be together with our children once more.

A dimly recognized the removal of the pressure on my bleeding neck and the sound of a growl above me. I was sure I would be unconscious soon, and then all the pain would go away and I would be back with Cecilia and our children.

"Harry?" a voice whispered, shocked and disgusted. It was vaguely recognizable as Sophia's. I couldn't help but wonder what had happened to her, why she had done this. She sounded as though she was choking, though she could have been sobbing.

"Aren't you going to finish your meal, or can I?" a different voice sneered. There was no reply and then I thought I heard a hiss. Footsteps were re-treating. Slowly, as if ever step was a struggle.

"You sure about this?" the voice asked.

"Will he survive?" Sophia asked desperately. Whoever else was there laughed at her.

"That's not how it works," it said to her harshly. "You really are naïve, aren't you?" It scoffed. "Well, you already proved that by coming here tonight."

Pain was returning. All through their conversation it had been building again. But now it was unbearable, worse even than before, when I had been getting murdered. It felt like I had been set on fire, and my first thought was that Sophia had done just that. I even thought I could smell smoke.

I let out a agonized scream as I lost all control of my body, surrendering to the scorching hot pain all over me.

Finally, after what had felt like forever, the pain receded. I was hit by an onslaught of sounds and smell, much louder and stronger than I ever remembered them being.

"Harry?" I recognized Sophia's voice. My eyes flickered open and I looking once more upon the monster that looked and sounded like my sister. I stood up quickly, much quicker than I had expected.

"You killed them." It came out as a snarl and before I knew what I was doing I launched myself at her. She dived out of the way in a blur and I stopped and refocused. An inhuman-like growl sounded from my mouth. I was about to attack her again when I felt two pairs of hands of my arms, holding me back.

"Easy, tiger," someone mocked me.

"Get off me!" I growled.

"Not as long as you keep going after your sister."

I looked at the monster in front of me and shook my head. "Whoever, or whatever that is, it's not my sister. It just looks like it."

"Harry!" the monster proclaimed, upset. I didn't care.

"Come on, you, you need to feed," a different voice said from behind me. Still holding onto me tightly, they begin to push me through what I realized was a forest.

"How the hell did we get stuck with two newborns to look after?" his companion grumbled.

"David liked the look of the lass but it turns out she's a right idiot."

The monster hissed at them.

"Oh calm down, love."

I was struggling against my captors' grip. I could feel it was a struggle from them, and I got the feeling if it had only been one of them I could of fought them off easily.

"Stop struggling," one of them said. "We can make that burning in your throat go away." Resignedly, I stopped. I had no idea who they were or what we were doing, but my throat was on fire and if they could make it stop I wouldn't complain.

"Always works on troublesome newborns," the same man muttered smugly. No longer struggling, I concentrated on the new sights, sounds and smells. Everything was brighter and more refined, while noise was clearer and it felt like I could hear everything for miles around. But it was the scents that were most interesting of all. The two things behind me smelled bad, and, for some reason, I felt as if I shouldn't trust them. It was several bad smells combined to make a odour that was truly potent. The monster, on the other hand, smelled much nicer, and I felt myself softening towards it. Her. Sophia. Then I reminded myself of what she had done. The full horror of that night went through my mind, one appalling memory after another. No, I could never forgive that monster, no matter how much it looked or acted like my sister.

"Here we are," one of the voices announced. All other smells were forgotten as the sweetest one of all drifted up on the wind. Sometimes it was sweeter than others, but it didn't make much different right now, as my throat burned raw, telling me it was this that I craved so badly. I strained against my captors' hands, and I noticed the monster had frozen in anticipation.

Suddenly, I felt the hands realise me and I rushed forward. I knew the monster had done the same. I growled at it and it growled back, and I heard laughter behind me. I thought I heard a scream but I didn't care as I pounced, and a delicious, cooling liquid filled my throat. It was only once the ecstasy was over that I cam back to my senses. I looked at my feet and saw the corpse of a woman lying there. Her neck was torn apart just like Cecilia's had been. I stumbled backwards, horrified by what I had done. I looked over at the monster, who was crouched by a different body with its mouth at their neck, and I realized I was a monster too.

"What have you done to me?" I snarled. I turned around at the sound of laughter and found two men stood there, except they had the same red eyes and pale skin as Sophia now had.

"I'm sorry, Harry," I heard Sophia whisper. She was done with the body now.

One of the men sighed. "There's time for explanations later. Right now, we need to burn the evidence."

"Unlike when we got that one," the other one muttered, looking at Sophia.

"Then we'll go back to David," the first man continued.

"Who's David?" I asked aggressively. "And why should I go back to him?"

"Harry, don't run off," Sophia whispered. "I did and look what happened."

"And you don't really have a choice in the matter," one of the men said. "Newborn or not, I like the odds of two against one. And since your sister here wants you to come with us as well, it'd be three." I quickly realized I had no choice in the matter.

"Will you let me explain?" Sophia said softly. We were somewhere in the middle of the forest. I had been brought back here and had things explained to me by the man named David, who apparently was the leader of our… coven. Even inside my head the words sounded foreign, like something out of a horror novel. Vampire. Blood-sucking. Coven. It hadn't sunk in yet.

When I didn't answer, Sophia continued anywhere. "I just wanted to go home," she whispered. She sounded so pitiful, I couldn't help but feel sorry for her, despite everything. In that one sentence, she truly sounded like my sister again.

"I didn't like it. I didn't want to be here. So I ran away. We're faster than them. And I … I was stupid. I didn't think it through. I wasn't thinking. I just wanted to be home. It was completely stupid. I thought I could go home, and that there was no way on Earth I would try and kill my own family."

"Obviously," I murmured sarcastically. "And what, you thought we weren't going to notice the blazing red eyes."

"You were my family. I thought you wouldn't care." I laughed bitterly. My naively optimistic sister had really taken things up a notch.

"Well, you've certainly fucked things up this time, Sophia," I muttered angrily, not even caring that I had just swore in front of a woman.

She gasped. "You swore! You never swear!"

"Yeah, well, it seemed like the right fucking occasion to!" I roared at her. I was breathing heavily as anger overtook my body. How could she sit there so calmly and discuss our family's deaths. Where was the remorse? She had killed Cecilia. And Victoria. And Albert. And Mama. And Papa. And Louisa. And Maria. And everyone. Our entire family. Dead at her hands.

Unknowingly, I growled. The noise was inhumane, animal-like. The next thing I knew several pairs of strong arms were holding me back as I tried to attack my sister again. I fought against them furiously, all I wanted was to hurt her like she'd hurt them.

"Calm it, newborn," a voice ordered. Still I struggled.

"Harry?" Sophia's voice was quiet, worried. She was looking at me with hurt-filled eyes. She could have been ten years old again and reproaching me for abandoning her to get caught when we tried to steal the cookie jar from the kitchen.

The old memory calmed me. This was Sophia, my twin sister, my best friend, what was I doing?

"Sorry," I murmured, ashamed. The hands released me.

"It's OK," Sophia replied quietly.

* * *

2010

Rural Canada

_Amelia_

"It was an endless cycle," Harry said out loud, his voice quiet. His mind was still open to me though, memories of Sophia whirring through it, but with my expanded mind I was able to watch and listen to his words at the same time. We were still sat up the tree where the rest of our family had left us. I had watched his memories of his human life in stunned silence. The few happier human memories that he had of his wife and children that he clung to desperately. And his worst memory, the night he was changed and his family were murdered by his twin sister. This was what he hadn't told me, this was what he had hidden. I found I couldn't be angry at him, only remorseful that he felt he couldn't share with me, only pity that someone so kind had suffered so much.

"I'd grow angry at her for what she did, then I'd remember she was my sister. The girl I'd promised to protect no matter once," he laughed bitterly.

"Why did you finally leave?" I asked.

The memory began to play through his mind.

"We argued. She told me she didn't need me, so I took her words to heart and left for Europe. Stayed there for awhile, did various things."

Several memories flashed through his mind. The two World Wars. Sneaking into a Beatles concert in the 1960s. Watching England's World Cup win in 1966 on the TV. Working in a mental asylum to learn more about his talent and how people with personality disorders effected it. As he thought about that a more modern memory flashed to mind, discussing this with Alice, who wanted to know what reason a vampire had to work in such a place.

"Finally, I ended up in Volterra, stayed there a few years until…" I watched the memory play out as he killed a young girl who had been too nice to live, smelled too nice.

"Ended up in a cave for a decade. You don't want to see that." He shook his head despairingly, but I still saw a flash of memory. Of him in a frozen state of sorrow.

"Finally, Siobhan find me, she still owed me from when Sophia and me helped her with her little coven problem in Ireland. She brought Carlisle and here I am."

I watched the last few memories, as he fought against being part of a family, as he tried to leave but ended up calling Esme 'Mom' instead and how he finally accepted them as family.

"And then I came along," I whispered. He smiled.

"The nicest person I've ever met," he said fervently. Suddenly, as I saw me through his mind, I understood what he meant. And I felt his desperation – that another good person couldn't die.

"You should have told me earlier," I challenged him.

"I know," he agreed sadly. "I was worried." I saw in his mind why. Worried I would think I was a replacement.

I thought very carefully about my next words. "I might have thought that," I admitted reluctantly. "If I hadn't been able to see into your mind like this. But, you were never searching for a replacement. You never looked elsewhere until I fell down a flight of stairs and into your life. And I know that you love me, for me."

"For being the most loveable, but unpredictable, person I ever met," he teased with a soft smile. I saw in his mind then, how my scents always teased him, swapping quickly from one to the other, and laughed at his predicament.

"I love you, too, by the way," I added as an afterthought. He chuckled then, before pulling me close, and sealing his lips to mine.

"What about Sophia?" I asked as he pulled away, as always. (Stupid Victorian morals!)

"I don't know," he shrugged. "I went to Britain to find her, instead I found you. That's a deal I will happily take."

"Didn't Siobhan say Sophia told her you were in the cave?" I asked. He shrugged. "Isn't that proof she still cares?"

"I never said she didn't," he sighed. "Nor do I not care about her. But with so much past between us, how can I ever forgive her?"

"If it wasn't for Sophia neither of us would be here having this conversation," I challenged.

He sighed again. "Indeed. If I was to ever end up face to face with her again I'd want to thank her and attack her at the same time. Because no matter how positive the outcome was in the end, there's still no forgiving what she did."

I had no comeback for that. It seemed Harry and Sophia's argument would last all of eternity.

"I think I could just forgive her, you know, if she showed some sort of remorse. If she stopped trying to make it sound like a mistake anyone could make and admit she fu- messed up."

Unable to say anything to that, I decided to joke instead. "You know, this is the 21st century, no one cares if you say fuck."

He chuckled softly. "You're taking this surprisingly well," he commented. "All things considered."

"You mean considering earlier today I learnt I was a mind manipulator and ran so far away from the house I unknowingly crossed the Canadian border?"

He smiled at me brashness. "Exactly."

"It's hard to explain. A part of me is relieved to finally know what's been bothering you. And I can still see into your mind, and I can see how much you love me. And how I'm not a replacement. And I'm glad to be able to help you. You're a good person, and after all you've been through, you deserve happiness, and I'm pleased to be able to give you it."

We both lapsed into silence then, I leaned my head against his shoulder and we sat comfortably. Harry had yet to close his mind and I could hear his relief, his joy, and his love.

_I should…_ Something had made Harry incredibly excited, but he stopped the thought cold. Suddenly, his mind shut off.

"Hey!" I protested, sitting up to glare at him.

"It's a surprise," Harry remarked happily, grinning. I tried to see if there was a way past his mental shield, but failed.

"I assure you I'm not being evil or malicious, so you can stop trying to get past my shields," he said cheerfully, still grinning. "Let's head home," he suggested. Quickly, he scooped my body up into his arms and jumped out the tree, landing lightly on his feet.

"I can run myself, you know," I remarked sarcastically. Still grinning unashamedly, he put me down on my feet, and together we ran back to the Denali coven's home.

Alice came rushing out the door to greet us, a grin to match Harry's on her face. She was carrying a large bag, filled to the brink with God knows what.

"Alice, what-" I began to ask, but she had already grabbed Harry's wrist with her spare hand and the two of them had disappeared into the forest.

_Annoying, know-it-all psychics, _I grumbled as I entered the house. _And mind-readers_, I added, seeing Edward had a grin just like Harry and Alice's plastered on his face. All my family were there except Nessie and Jake. Everyone was watching me warily, except Edward, who was seemed to be grinning even more just to annoy me, and Jasper, who looked confused and was no doubt trying to figure out the meaning behind my mixed emotions.

"You two sure took your time, what were you up to?" Emmett asked with a smirk.

"Shut it, Emmett," I snapped, still annoyed by whatever Harry's unknown plan was.

Rosalie and Esme shared a loaded look at my anger, before watching me with concern.

"I made some chocolate milkshake for you in the kitchen," Esme told me sweetly, standing up. I followed her into the kitchen.

"There's no need, Rose," I heard Edward tell his sister. "She's not upset because of that."

"You all knew, didn't you?" I asked Esme softly. She looked at the floor, ashamed.

"Harry told us bits, yes," she admitted. I ran my fingers through my hair distractedly, not sure whether I was angry with them or not.

"We thought it was best to let him tell you in his own time," Carlisle told me, joining his wife in the kitchen. "It was his story to tell, and we know how much he hates telling it," he said sadly.

"It's OK, I understand," I told them comfortingly.

"How are you?" Esme asked, still watching me carefully.

"I'm fine," I told her reassuringly. "Edward was telling the truth, I'm not upset. Harry's past isn't his fault."

"That's incredibly mature of you," Carlisle said with a smile.

"You sound surprised," I said challengingly, but I was joking. Carlisle and Esme just smiled.

We fell silent as Nessie and Jake came through the door. I imagined Nessie did not know the truth. It was hardly a child-friendly story. Even a child as mature as Nessie.

"Anyone know why Alice is covering trees in ribbons out there?" Jake asked. I looked at Carlisle and Esme, who seemed just as confused as me.

"No good can come of this," I muttered.

"I wouldn't be so sure," Edward shouted in from the living room.

* * *

**Reviews are greatly appreciated :) What did you think about Harry's past? Amelia's reaction? And what is Harry planning?**


End file.
